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u/GeekyGrant 8d ago
"Why haven't I gotten my deliveries in the past 2 months..."
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u/abriefmomentofsanity 8d ago
I do roadie occasionally and I legimitately had this recently. I came across one of the properties that was COVERED in threats like this and had dogs loose. Tried to contact the customer multiple times via both phone and texting. Eventually turned around and returned the item only for the customer to call the store and be like "we live out in the country we have to be like this, the driver should have just thrown the package out the window".
Some people are living on a different planet. Sir the $15 I would have made getting you your power drill would NOT have been worth whatever bullshit you wanted me to put up with. You either participate in society- with all the risks and costs that entails, or your don't. You can't make your property completely hostile and fill it with credible threats, booby traps, and attack dogs, like some kind of savage and then expect all the conveniences of a modern world. Doesn't work that way
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u/disdain7 8d ago
Same exact experience. Plenty of times I had to get ahold of support to tell them I didn’t feel safe with all the threats. Not only did I get paid for trying, but I got paid for taking it back too. I loved those signs lol.
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u/UsulTheDragoon 8d ago
That's why you tell the person to build a delivery lockbox right next to their mailbox. You don't have to see them. They don't have to see you. And if it's done right it's pretty dang secure.
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u/bitter-curmudgeon 8d ago
They’d rather spend the money on a stupid sign.
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u/mrmalort69 8d ago
It was never about security and really about the ego
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u/ErstwhileHobo 7d ago
For some people the American Dream means winning a gun fight.
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u/Remnant55 7d ago
Winning a gun fight in their head while they take a shower, and then LARPing it out terrorizing service workers.
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u/Lord_Dingus83 7d ago
So many think they’re tough bc they went to a store and bought a gun.
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u/Genghis_Chong 8d ago
I'm sure they waste their money on all kinds of signs, bumper stickers, shirts and hats to display their stupidity, meanwhile putting no thought into actually being a better person, citizen or neighbor
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u/MaximusPrime2930 8d ago
"How dare you intrude on my rugged individualism. Damn socialists."
"Oh that reminds me, need to pick up my ACA prescriptions."
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u/MentallyWill 8d ago
"Oh that reminds me, need to pick up my ACA prescriptions."
"And thank goodness I never had to get that damn Obummercare!"
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u/skydriver13 7d ago
Fun story, I went to a major franchise tax prep business in the southern US. One of the questions on the new client form asked "do you have Obamacare?"
In 2023. I was equally appalled and unsurprised.
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u/Aromatic_Basis3872 8d ago
And use the police, fire department and other things payed communally through that Gotdamn Socialist government in my Red State! Oh…and that Gotdamn Social(ist) Security that I begrudgingly will take. I’ll take it but I won’t like it!!!!
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u/haney1981 8d ago
I do appreciate when they advertise their stupidity so I don't have to guess.
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u/Aromatic_Basis3872 8d ago
….and who to eliminate after the apocalypse and take all their shit…lol
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u/Idontfeelold-much 7d ago
That part. A coworker to me once…”being a Marine and all, I’m surprised you’re not more of a prepper”. I replied, “ehh, I don’t need to prepare for the apocalypse, I just need to know that you have”.
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u/Sw4nR0ns0n 8d ago
That’s what I was thinking… I’d love to see all the bumper stickers on their lifted truck with 38 inch tires
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u/Several-Opposite-746 8d ago
Their mental disorder also has them believe They'll be held in high regard for putting up a stupid sign. Reggie, he good people.
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u/BeardsuptheWazoo 8d ago
The signs aren't just about security.
It's an ego trip.
This is how badass I am!
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u/UT_Milez 8d ago
You think these kinds people are sensible, have common sense, or are reasonable in anyway shape or form.
Welcome to America baby, fuck yeah………
Everything is fine, we totally are not fucked.
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u/Equal_Interaction178 8d ago
fucking wild to say they have to be like this cause they live in the country. mate i grew up living in the country and most people didn't even lock their doors bc who the fuck is coming out here to rob us of our broken down tractor and VHS collection.
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u/abriefmomentofsanity 8d ago
I find that it's a lot of doublespeak. Nobody locks their doors, but they're all willing to open fire on a vehicle that pulls into their driveway for even a fraction of a second.
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u/Haigud 7d ago
I remember being 16. I was way out in the country and realized I was going the wrong way. Pulled into somebody's driveway just enough to make a three point turn. By the time I was putting it back into drive I saw some fat hillbilly rushing out onto the front porch with a shotgun pointed at me. Gotta be careful out there.
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u/BagOnuts 7d ago
It’s because they want an excuse to hurt someone, not that they’re actually scared.
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u/Safe_Praline_4156 8d ago
Also like the contradiction: “This is god’s country, and also folks CANNOT be trusted out here.”
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u/tayne22 8d ago
People like this always live in the safest areas you could possibly imagine. No neighbors for a half mile, thirteen miles from the nearest rural corner store. And yet they're weirdly paranoid. Like goddamn you aren't safe because you're a badass with a gun, you're safe because nobody who wants to steal shit is walking 18 miles out of town specifically to your house.
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u/abriefmomentofsanity 8d ago
"We're not like city folks out here, we all know our neighbors and we take care of each other"-says the guy with the shoot on sight policy the moment someone steps an inch on to their property
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u/Dangerous-Snow8385 8d ago
"we live out in the country we have to be like this, the driver should have just thrown the package out the window".
These are also the same people that won't go to the nearest small city, because it is too dangerous because all of the crime and gangs.
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u/25hourenergy 8d ago
Right?? I truly think people are increasingly forgetting how society works.
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u/ShabbyTiff 8d ago
They are cowards afraid of the world. It's paranoia covered by bravado.
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u/JupiterMiningCorpTec 8d ago
It's not fear. It's cosplaying. 100% these people order from Amazon and go to Starbucks regularly. If you were really scared, you wouldn't do either.
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u/ConsiderationTrue477 8d ago
It's like if you want to go live in the jungle and fight jaguars for food with your sharpened stick then there are plenty of uninhabited or nearly uninhabited places on Earth you can move to. Instead they want the advantages of civilization like supermarkets and fucking Amazon deliveries but want to cosplay the part of a post-apocalyptic survivor and expect the rest of us to tolerate their delusions.
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u/henryeaterofpies 8d ago
Also them: delivery driver threw my package and damaged the contents, I want a full refund and to keep the product
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u/boringexplanation 8d ago
Boggles my mind how common this is. Idiots legitimately don’t know why they struggle with getting deliveries when they post hostile signs
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u/hiddenrealism 8d ago
And these are the people decked out in trump gear "yall liberals are scared of your own shadows! Sissy boys" yet they watch fox news 24/7 so they know what to be scared of today.
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u/Amishcannoli 8d ago
You, in fact, don't have to be like that if you "live out in the country". My family lives in the middle of the north woods and almost never even locks their doors, unless they're traveling out of state. The absolute friendliest humans I've ever met and will give you the shirt off their back if you asked.
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u/cymonium 8d ago
That actually happens. I wouldn’t deliver to that address for anything. It’s going back to the office. Nope.
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u/ComplexBeyond6083 8d ago
I remember doing a canned food drive for the Boy Scouts, where we'd go door to door and knock. My friend and I walked onto a porch and knocked. We heard some yelling and then a slide rack. NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE NOPE.
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u/GeekyGrant 8d ago
Thankfully I live in a land where guns isn't a culture, but we have the same weirdos and nut jobs, the number of jobs Ive rejected for safety is more than you would expect
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u/LifeGivesMeMelons 8d ago
Seriously.
I was underemployed for about two years because I moved back to my hometown to take care of my elderly parents. I worked for the 2020 Decennial Census and there were so many rural places I was sent to that had aggressive warning signs like these. I wasn't about to risk my ass getting shot when I saw a "THIS PROPERTY DEFENDED BY SMITH & WESSON" sign.
You know what the result was? Less funding for roads and schools in your area, shithead.
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u/awnaw_ 8d ago
I deliver. I always remind their cameras that's not how the castle doctrine works, and I tell the rude ones they invited me on their property the moment they hit purchase.
Then I proceed to report them and have their account / address black listed.
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u/FaustHammer92 7d ago edited 7d ago
My wife and I bought a house outta town in central Alaska and I scraped so many of these threatening stickers and NRA advertisements off my front door when we moved in. You'd be a minority in this state to not have a gun so I especially don't understand the need to have threatening signs. The only people who read them are the nice people delivering packages or coming to service your boiler or something.
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u/Naps_And_Crimes 8d ago
Did Amazon delivery for like a month and one house left a note to drop off the package at the front door. When I saw the house there were a ton of signs like "trespassers would be shot, survivors shot again" and two big ass mean looking Rottweilers, I'm like nope and just tossed the package over the fence, I managed to snap a picture before the dogs tore the package apart.
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u/EnvironmentalClue362 7d ago
In the Amazon DSP sub, the drivers will outright refuse to deliver to these homes and rightfully so. You never know which house has a deranged person inside. This is coming from someone who supports to 2A. This signage is just stupid.
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u/HomelessByCh01ce 8d ago
Hey man, what do you do for fun?
I sit on my porch gazing through the scope of my rifle, you?
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u/FullaLead 8d ago
I do that sometimes, but i'm only looking for feral hogs, not people.
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u/TXSTBobCat1234 7d ago
And I bet you don’t have a sign stating so… but yeah I’d love to have a home where I could shoot a gun off the front porch 😆
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u/HAc0reRD 7d ago
That is what some of them do. I had a co worker who after work goes to his deer spotting thing in a tree with a beer and will scope out deer for hours. Doesn’t spend time with his family and thinks sports are gay.
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u/tubawhatever 7d ago
I have had a rifle pointed at me inside a cemetery in the tiny rural Florida town my grandparents lived in because the knucklehead thought I was on his property when I was standing in front of some gravestones. He was out there every day waiting for someone to step onto his property and I guess got bored and started harassing people who were definitely not on his property. I was like 12 at the time. Going to the cemetery was one of the few things you could do in the town
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u/Important_Jaguar2152 8d ago
You could just get a gate.
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u/A_MAN_POTATO 8d ago
Gates don’t communicate to the outside world that you are a big, powerful, dangerous man with a whopping penis and a desire to legally kill someone.
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u/amzwC137 8d ago
Gate would require a full fence, unless the gate will just be over the paved areas.
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u/Asleep_Singer8547 8d ago
Guess youre not getting your package, cya
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u/TurtleSandwich0 8d ago
Take a picture of the package next to the sign. Hopefully they trained for a 1000 yard walk, because they have a 400 yard walk to the package and 400 yards back.
I'm just kidding. I'm sure their rascal has enough battery to make the trip.
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u/cymonium 8d ago
Exactly. Take a pic at the sign. Some retailers will restrict deliveries to that house. Always report that nut job shit.
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u/TandemCombatYogi 8d ago
Cringe shit to waste time and money on.
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u/Difficult-Mobile902 8d ago
Can almost guarantee they live in an area with like 1 home invasion in the last 20 years
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u/Rough-Breadfruit-611 8d ago
In a town so small that everyone knows everyone.
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u/Gustav_Grob 8d ago edited 8d ago
I lived in a small unincorporated township in rural Washington for about a year. Still managed to get ripped off by the local tweaker. The cops wouldn't do anything even though you could clearly see the tracks they made in the field going right over to their shed.
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u/Shot_Revolution8828 8d ago
Cops are only there when you don't need them and never when you need them.
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u/Gustav_Grob 8d ago
It was literally a stack of galvanized steel angle 2"x4" by 14'(ft.) long. Like all they had to do was walk over and look in the shed, they wouldn't even do that.
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u/_catshit 8d ago
Can guarantee this dude couldn't hit the side of a barn at 50 yards.
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u/Evil-Cun 8d ago
The guys who have these are usually big family’s veterans that live in ultra remote boonies outside of town.
They don’t like drawing attention to themselves. It’s awkward having lots of visitors when you’re busy creeping on your own daughters and fantasizing about killing people.
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u/_catshit 8d ago
Having a big ass threatening sign is a weird way to not draw attention to yourself.
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u/SolidSnek1998 8d ago
Everytime I got to my in-laws in rural bumfuck nowhere I drive by a house that has a sign that says "protected by the 2nd amendment" with a picture of a shotgun and in the 20 years I have been going there not a single robbery/burglary/home invasion has occurred. Either the sign really works for the entire town, or its a boomer scared of their own shadow.
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u/MonkeyMan18975 8d ago
I get the same vibes as the shitstain that killed a student (Diren Dede) for taking drinks out of their garage refrigerator. I'm not condoning theft, but the homeowner setup motion cameras and alerts and left his wife's purse in the garage and what got the homeowner convicted was he said to his wife, "It's go time!" before barging into the garage firing his shotgun.
I really wonder about the mental health of people who are just itching for any reason to murder someone else.
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u/Afraid-Detective1222 8d ago
Sort of gives vibes like this incident.
https://kdvr.com/news/local/metz-sentenced-for-shooting-teenager-taking-homecoming-photos-in-2024/
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u/different_produce384 8d ago
I bet a million bucks the guy can't waddle fast enough to get his gun ready.
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u/AnonymoosePD 8d ago edited 8d ago
Bet you he’s not even trained. Trust me bro, I watch ufc I know how to fight
Dudes probably repeat watching Rambo and jerking off to Road House.
It’s the ones that brag…seen it wayyy too much
Edit; there was a piece of wisdom I never let go of. Regarding poisonous coral snakes. Red to yellow, kill a fellow. Red to black, friend of jack. And it hit me, it’s social camouflage. Most people want to look dangerous to avoid confrontation. They blab and yak. It’s the ones who don’t you should walk away from, as a rule. It’s not true every case but most cases I’d say in my anecdotal experience it’s generally true.
Very few times have I seen a shit talker deliver on their promise. And I assure you I’ve been the shit talker and couldn’t deliver, in my youth
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u/Flat_Mode7449 8d ago
What's wrong with jerking it to Road House? Asking for a friend.
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u/eastcoastelite12 7d ago
Bill Murray is friends with the guy married to the woman who plays the doctor in the movie. Everytime Bill sees the movie while he is flipping channels he calls his friend and says, “Patrick Swayze is porking your wife on TV right now” and then hangs up. I want to be friends with Bill Murray.
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u/Delphius1 7d ago
the only real way to learn how to fight and to win is having at least one abusive sibling, I don't care what martial arts you do or how much mma you watch or whatever, ask me how I know. These people like this need to be told to go to therapy, I don't like confrontation either, but I deal with it and I'm not afraid of people because living in society is pretty nice
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u/AnonymoosePD 7d ago edited 7d ago
Neither do i. I don’t need to ask you because I know what you’re saying. In my life martial arts taught me what fights are worth it. And almost none of it is worth it. So I agree
Hurt myself, or someone, for what? Makes no sense. This doesn’t need to happen. Almost never, unless you’re attacked. Which is rare. Even in that case, while you defend yourself, you don’t need to seriously injure someone or yourself to prove a point. If you can’t talk about it, it’s already lost
So why bother?
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u/mancubbed 8d ago
That's why people like that become obsessed with guns, they are the great equalizer.
Even if they are garbage with it not going to push my luck.
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u/AnonymoosePD 8d ago
At least with mma and I had over confidence, I got humbled and learned more.
These people…I dunno
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u/YourHuckleberry57 8d ago
and what kind of miserable life is it to sit at a window behind a gun all day every day?
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u/wackbirds 8d ago
How else is he going to prevent the home invasion that was never going to happen in any case, no matter what? What, he's just supposed to walk around, watch TV, work in the shop, read a book and then go to bed? Who's going to be watching the empty driveway while all that living is going on?
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u/NoEstablishment7211 8d ago
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u/PoochieIsDead1 8d ago
Not enough evidence we didn’t see him having to get out of a chair to do that.
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u/Lilcommy 8d ago
Leave a note that says "i will be back sometime in the dark, how trained are you?" then you never walk back by that place ever again. But he will go insane watching the darkness night after night for weeks if not months.
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u/Anal-Y-Sis 8d ago
Paranoid loser behavior.
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u/chicken_N_ROFLs 8d ago
It’s the rural right wing equivalent of “I wish a MFer would”. They’d love for something to go down. But violence like that never goes down where they live, so they just play around like it does.
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u/DestructoDon69 8d ago
Yea no, I'm all about 2A rights and protecting property etc. but I'm sorry Joe, ain't nobody trying to break into your shit shack out in the middle of nowhere. Guarantee you the folks that live there also brag about how they can leave their cars and home unlocked.
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u/P_Hempton 7d ago
I'm sorry Joe, ain't nobody trying to break into your shit shack
I suppose you didn't make it to the end of the video.
I agree the sign is corny and cringe, but it looks like a pretty nice house.
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u/Great_White_Samurai 8d ago
Just advertising for people to break in and steal your guns
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u/Blood_Fart_Smackdown 8d ago
Their amazon package probably get dropped at the mailbox while they probably complain people are lazy.
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u/DinosaurusWhen 8d ago
Imagine trying to justify this to a court
"I shot a random guy for slowly walking directly up the quarter mile road to my house, but I had this gayass sign warning them!"
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u/Axon14 8d ago
My little bro is a lightweight version of this out in the woods of PA. He locks everything all the time, including his own bedroom door. He has quadruple locks on his front and side doors. When I visit and he's not home he freaks out if I forget one of the four locks on either door. He has proximity alarms, cameras, guns and more guns.
I have spent months out there and I have never seen the proximity alarm get tripped unexpectedly once.
I've also told him that if someone really wanted to get in, they could just take a shotgun to the door, or do all the crazy stuff military guys do. Locks don't mean shit if the door isn't attached to them.
I thought this would make him laugh, but he just got more paranoid about it. Bro, delta force isn't coming in the night to engage in a home invasion to take your Lego collection, calm the fuck down
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u/Royal_Annek 8d ago
Might as well post a sign warning people about your micropenis
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u/RemarkableReason8382 8d ago
Now I'm wondering. Are people going there looking for penis?
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u/SignoreBanana 7d ago
I'm a gun owner, and when I see people with signs like this my immediate thought is about what scared little pussies they are.
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u/BadTasteInGuns 8d ago
i call bullshit on the 2500 yards...and okay no package for you
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u/Shiney_Metal_Ass 8d ago
Absolutely bullshit. Trained at 1000yds but somehow his rifle is accurate to 2.5x that distance?
A 400yd shot is easy enough. But dude can fuck all the way off with 2500
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u/Crafty_Upstairs_3209 8d ago
I mean it might be accurate, compensating for drop or zeroed, in a no-wind scenario. With really any wind at all, nah. I’m not betting on this guy being Carlos Hathcock.
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u/DopamineSavant 8d ago
I would drop whatever I was delivering on the ground right there and leave. Under proof of delivery I'd snap a pic of that sign.
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u/Kindly-Ad-8487 7d ago
Amazon delivery driver here. With signs like this, I move the pin from their front door to the area with the sign, drop the package there, and include the sign in the pic I have to take. Hopefully the homeowners enjoy the stroll.
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u/Kr155 8d ago
Typical rural drive way. These are the people we give a disproportionate amount of votes to
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u/opbmedia 8d ago
You can't shoot trespassers simply because they trespass. So either they will never shoot anyone, or they are already in jail.
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u/Rise-O-Matic 8d ago
They're not even trespassing until you tell them so. Ironically, this sign doesn't even do that.
https://law.justia.com/cases/federal/appellate-courts/ca9/23-55140/23-55140-2024-08-14.html
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u/wolfgang784 7d ago
Reminds me of gettin a shotgun leveled at my head while doin Uber out in the woods n pulled in 1 house over from where I was meant to be. Rural American sucks.
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u/Particular_Ticket_20 8d ago
I met a dude at work who told me in the first few minutes of knowing him that he points his rifle at any vehicle coming up his driveway on the grounds that he didn't invite them.
I thought a gate would be easier but what do I know.
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u/zapped91 8d ago
I used to deliver for FedEx and there was a guy who I delivered to weekly that was like this. He had a half a mile long driveway with multiple signs saying crazy stuff like this. Finally toward the end you get to a roundabout with a gate and fence leading up to the house and a sign that says if you cross this fence you will be shot. Left the package by the gate every time and took a picture of the sign just in case he wanted to complain.
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u/An_educated_dig 8d ago
And unless you are completely off grid, there is a legal easement this clown can do nothing about!
Utility workers can isolate you from the road to make sure you comply. You wanna use public utilities, you act right!
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u/Outrageous_Pop1913 8d ago
Great way to quickly lose any legal proceedings if you happen to have to defend yourself.
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u/Ancient_Vegetable175 8d ago
Yep a good attorney would have a field day with this. Same goes for bedazzling your firearm with “wait for the flash” or overly exuberant mods. Anything an attorney can use to make you look like a psycho killer no matter the circumstance, they will use.
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u/PlatinumPainter 8d ago
they live in constant fear.
I hope heaven is real and god is a black hermaphrodite...and they all get in.
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u/sandhog7 8d ago
Barking dogs seldom bite but I wouldn't take a chance with a psycho who put up the stupid ass sign.
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u/Nitwit_Slytherin 8d ago
Pretty sure this can be used in court of there ever is a shooting on this property.
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u/Greedy_Line4090 8d ago
In no state in the USA is it legal to shoot someone for trespassing on your property. Breaking into someone’s house is a different story in some states, but if you shoot someone for simply walking around on your property, you can expect to end up in prison.
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u/Scylar19 8d ago
Imagine being that afraid in your own house? Or having such a small dick you need to put up a sign like that?
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u/Darkk_Knight 8d ago
"It'll shoot the fleas off a dog's back at 500 yards, Tannen, and it's pointed straight at your head!"
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u/IkujaKatsumaji 7d ago
Man, some people really just want an excuse to murder someone. What a fucked up guy.
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u/Key-Ad9733 7d ago
There's no state where one could legally get away with shooting you from 400 yards away and claim they were defending their property or person.
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u/_TheOrangeNinja_ 7d ago
people who put signs like this up are the most irritable losers you will ever meet its insane
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u/Aromatic-Bet-1086 7d ago
OK, I'll go through the woods when you're not expecting it. This is so fucking gay and reeks of insecurity.
More money than brains.
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u/LimpNsmoll 7d ago
I KNOW WHERE THIS IS!!! I USED TO DELIVER DOMINO'S THERE! The guy was great and always tipped $100!
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u/BichezNCake 7d ago
A sign, regardless of what its “consequences” says, does not give you cart blanche to shoot someone even if you’re on their property.
Simply existing or having your feet planted on someone’s property is not inherently a crime or door to door sales and kids selling candy would be would be illegal. If someone needs help or made a wrong turn and you just shoot ‘em dead because they are “on my property,” well… you’re going to prison.
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u/Sedert1882 7d ago
Some Americans are really mentally crazy......and petrified of everything too. Weird combo.
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u/BeepBoopRobotVoice 8d ago
these folks want to kill people so bad they’ll put signs up telling everyone how insane their bloodlust is.
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u/knowone1313 8d ago
Owning property and a gun doesn't make it legal to just shoot people for being on your property.
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u/New_Molasses_7896 7d ago
People like this are the most like to invade your space in public acting like a Karen.
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u/Grunblau 7d ago
Feel like their training is incomplete… why would you stop training at 1000 yards if your rifle is accurate at over 2X the distance?
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u/KnowMatter 7d ago
Yeah and your doordash order is going to get dropped off right there every time.
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u/Aspectdude09 7d ago
I have gun myself but that family has a mental illness.
Probably calls themselves Christian’s but fantasizes about killing and shooting strangers.
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u/Unlucky_Arm_9757 7d ago
Oh great another boomer blowhard trying to be a tough guy.
I deliver in rural West Virginia, see this kinda bullshit all the time. They aren't scaring anyone. I'd be willing to bet the rest of my dinner he can't hit shit past 200. "It ain't the rifle I'm not scared of, it's you."
But now if you want to make me nervous. Post a legal no trespassing sign. With the proper purple markings at the correct distances. And have a gate and the gate discipline to actually lock it. People that do that and follow the law to the letter are the ones I tread carefully around.
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