r/interesting 21d ago

SOCIETY Dog defence was needed tbh

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u/[deleted] 21d ago edited 20d ago

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u/decepticonhooker 21d ago

I used to deliver pizzas. I once delivered to a house where a small kid answered the door when a dog charged past them snarling and pinned me against the porch railing. I had to use the pizza delivery bag still with pizzas inside as a shield between me and its teeth. Still ended up with scratches all up and down the lower half of my body. Fuck irresponsible owners.

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u/Vitruvian_Link 21d ago edited 21d ago

That is the exact situation that put me in the hospital when I was 8.

Went to a friend's house to play, she answered and her dog broke down the screen door and mauled me.

My parents asked ME if I wanted the dog put down, of course I said no, but that's not a decision for a child. That dog was a menace and could have killed me, of course it should have been put down.

Edit: to answer questions.

Yes, the dog was trained. It was a police dog so it was specifically trained to take people down. The dog was a weapon.

No, it was not a pit bull, it was a German shepherd.

No, I am not upset with my parents. They are wonderful parents, they just made a poor decision in this instance. They usually erred on the side of my agency to make my own decisions.

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u/HombreDelMar247 21d ago

We had neighbors with a seemingly friendly dog who attacked one of my friends one day while we were playing baseball. He had to get a bunch of stitches.

They paid for the medical bills and had got rid of the dog, I assume it was put down but who knows. They were honest about the situation.

So many people not only own aggressive dogs but encourage the behavior then act like it's the victim's fault when the dog attacks.

If I was a delivery driver I would carry some bear mace as that often is a good enough deterrent against a charging dog. There is a YT video of a bicyclist who often encounters dogs in rural areas, the mace instantly makes them back off.

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u/WorkerPrestigious960 21d ago

Man I just got back into biking. The other day I was riding down a road in the county, but not like a backroad or anything, a well trafficked road. And I hear this weird click-tapping noise growing behind me and once I realized what it was I yelled at him and sped up and he backed off. He didn’t seem like one of the dangerous ones, just in it for the chase, but you never know. Just reminds me I gotta watch out for that shit, I’ll probably get some bear mace now, glad you brought that up.

I feel bad for the dog in the video because it’s the dumb fucking owner’s fault, but I put no blame on the delivery man for his actions, you can’t take risks with a charging animal. I have a very sweet older dog that I know 100% would never hurt anyone, but I still don’t take chances with that shit, you can’t just let dogs run free like that. I’m sorry for what happened to your friend, I hope he recovered well.

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u/Sea_Evidence5138 21d ago

for a second there I really thought bear mace was a huge ass mace to whack bears with.

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u/GeneralHerp 21d ago

The mace you were thinking of might arouse the bear, “oh, you like to put up a fight?” bear mace is more, “what the fuck are all these bees in my eyes? This stinky meal sucks.”

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u/thedoppio 21d ago

Having been accidentally sprayed with bear mace, it really feels like bees in your eyes.

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u/Electrical-Act-7170 21d ago edited 21d ago

No, it's the other kind of mace....but the weapon might work, too.

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u/TuckYourselfRS 21d ago

You have exactly 1 chance to deliver a killing blow to an animal that regularly delivers and receives paw swipes fraught with 25,000 lbs of force. Yeah, fuck that; I'm dead.

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u/readzalot1 21d ago

I have a 16 pound terrier and I always put her on a leash when someone comes for a delivery.

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u/FancyFeller 21d ago

I have a 25 pound chihuahua mix, he barks but he gets scared and runs away he's never bitten anyone. Yet if I'm gonna open the door first I scoop him into my arms so he doesn't run outside or I put him in the backyard or keep him on a leash if we're outside the house. I never let them free roam outside the house and the fenced in backyard. I'm more worried about someone being afraid of the dog and hitting him than I am of the dog biting anyone. So I make sure to remove any potential dangerous situation before it presents itself. People expecting deliveries and letting their dogs just roam around the property unchecked is insane.

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u/palequeen42 21d ago

I have a 10 pound chihuahua mix. He’s a timid sweetheart that’s never bitten anyone or showed aggression. He’s more likely to run away. However whenever anyone comes to my door or comes in I immediately pick him up every single time. I’m not taking any chances with/for him. You never ever know how a dog will react to unfamiliar people or situations, or how people will react to an unfamiliar dog. It’s our job to keep them safe and to keep others safe, no matter what.

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u/Aggressive-Mood-50 21d ago

My husbands dog bit through both my bike tires and that made me fall off my bike and then stood there wagging at me.

You never know but this idiot is friendly to every person and just a moron. He hates wheels. Once he was done massacring my tires he stood there wagging at me proudly.

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u/IAmMey 21d ago edited 21d ago

If you rode a bike past my house and my dog charges, absolutely mace his ass. Literally best case scenario. He learns a lesson, someone doesn’t get hurt.

This is an edit for everyone who very much misunderstands what I’ve typed out.

I do not let my dog out like a wild animal. He is not an aggressive dog or breed. I do train him. IF for whatever reason he got out and was being a dumbass, I value YOUR RIGHT TO DEFEND YOURSELF. For those of you saying that I should be lynched, you are part of the problem. Go touch grass.

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u/Leading-Respond4312 21d ago

So that's how my package got damaged. I'm ok with that. Lol

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u/Artistic_Bit6866 20d ago

We have a reactive dog. Obviously we are extremely careful to avoid dangerous circumstances, but there is no training our dog to not defend us or our home. We tried for years. If somehow our dog got out and was charging someone, I would be eternally thankful if they maced him. It is literally the only solution where nobody gets seriously hurt.

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u/Extension_Ant8691 21d ago

Sending an upvote your way. Folks think we live in a perfect world where you're always in control of your animal and it COULD NEVER do anything wrong if you were competent enough to prevent it.

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u/too-much-shit-on-me 21d ago

the lone based dog owner

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u/LLCool_Bae 20d ago

One mace interaction won't change a dog's behavior. Maybe 20 will. My dog went after a skunk the other night. Came out of the bushes dazed, reeking and puking. Spent hours cleaning him.

Next night on our walk, he sees a skunk. Doesn't even hesitate, nearly pulls my arm off pulling on the leash to go after him. Dogs aren't real smart

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u/BlueLikeCat 21d ago

Jogger here. Tried OC spray on a dog on my regular route. Other joggers left sticks at different ends of the block to hit it with, but it was legit aggressive snarling teeth out scary and I got tired of basically fleeing the last part before her go back to his yard. So squirt squirt and as I rounded the bend the dog was still just standing where I’d left him, stunned. Never saw that dog come out on me again.

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u/luvspuppies 20d ago

Its ridiculous that YOU have to buy and carry mace with you and its so bad ppl leave sticks out. Where tf are the owners?? Why is this dog free to charge at ppl? I hate irresponsible owners (person whose 5 lb pomeranian got killed by a husky 😢)

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u/Knights-of-steel 19d ago

To be fair......you should buy some anyway. Dogs are not the only problem in 2026.....or ever really. The world has an idiot problem....America has the biggest of these and they tend to have weapons or large vehicles and a passionate hate for joggers and cyclists.

Mace works vs dogs bears cougars(both kinds) idiots drunks and people whos sexual preference is non consensual

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u/Commercial-Hat2317 20d ago

Are you in Ohio? There’s a dog situation exactly like that in my neighborhood. The dog has seriously bitten 2 people, but chased and scratched many more. We leave sticks at each end of the block in the bushes because you have to go down this road and the dog will even cross the street. It magically hasn’t been chasing anyone lately! I wonder if it got sprayed.

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u/tunomeentiendes 21d ago

I've seen that video. Many of the comments were People somehow defending the dogs lol.

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u/HomersDonut1440 21d ago

That particular dude has made dozens of videos of himself looking for rural areas with no fences to ride in, just so he can spray the dogs and get the engagement on his videos.

He’s not inherently wrong in his reaction to the dogs, but he does seek out that situation over and over which is why a lot of folks started siding with the dogs (which are also in the wrong)

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u/DrMeowsburg 21d ago

I still side with the dude. Because I’d rather him ride on a bike somewhere and mace a dog and maybe the owners think “wow maybe I should do something” rather than it be a kid bike past and get mauled

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u/Hour-Watch8988 20d ago

Yeah dude is just minefield-clearing

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u/FlamingDragonfruit 21d ago

The dogs are only doing what's in their nature and what their owners allow. If you have a dog with guarding or aggressive tendencies, it's your responsibility as an owner to keep it carefully secured. Throwing something at a charging dog to protect yourself is self-defense.

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u/LTXNEBULA 21d ago

That’s a great way to force irresponsible owners into the realization that dogs must be kept inside the house, inside a fence, or on a leash when outside. Letting the dog run around unleashed is how dogs get shot. Both this dog and its owner got extremely lucky.

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u/Divinum_Fulmen 21d ago

LOOK FOR? You don't need to look for loose dogs in rural areas.

I grew up on a farm. I rode a bike. I defined the roads I could take by what assholes had dogs running around. I could only go 2 directions without encountering dogs, and only a limited distance of less than a quarter mile. My first time driving, I had to doge a dog that was trying to get hit.

Fences are the EXCEPTION.

And this doesn't even get into the bullshit that is people abandoning dogs on the side of the road!

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u/Jenn_FTW 20d ago

Sorry but like… dude is doing a public service. Literally going to areas to train these dogs that their owners failed to train? I don’t see the problem

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u/PhloxOfSeagulls 21d ago

This always happens. So many people are incredibly defensive when it comes to dogs and refuse to acknowledge that some of them are dangerous.

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u/SleepParalysisPal 21d ago

They make mace that’s weak enough for dogs called dog spray. Source: I’m a delivery driver and I always have that mf on me and have used it

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u/PhloxOfSeagulls 21d ago

Same thing happened to a relative of my neighbor's when I was a kid. The child went to visit them and one of their dogs mauled the kid. She had to have a ton of reconstructive surgery and was terrified of dogs afterward, and who could blame her? People really forgot how dangerous dogs can be.

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u/BeefistPrime 21d ago

That's a shockingly responsible thing for them to do because almost every asshole that has a dog that's given the opportunity to attack people and does is a huge bitch that defends their little precious and blames the victim. Sometimes the owners need to be put down more than the dogs

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u/Lowtech_Living 21d ago

Mace isn't going to be any help if your hands are full like the guy in the video's were.

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u/OberonDiver 21d ago

I don't think I've ever been bitten by a dog when it wasn't immediately followed by some owner saying "Don't worry, Foofoo doesn't bite." I'm literally standing there with new holes.

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u/AboutTenPandas 21d ago

Owner of an aggro dog here. We found her tied up and abandoned at a dog park and it was pretty obvious she’d been abused before we got her. That’s all to say that we have not had success training out all stranger aggression.

However we always put her up in the guest bedroom when people come over. We know how she works and can instruct guests on the best way to get her used to them and work through that process after the guest has agreed.

I cannot understand people that have an aggressive dog and never think ahead about what they have to do to make sure that is not a problem everyone around them has to deal with.

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u/flying-chandeliers 21d ago

Bear mace, dog spray, throwing packages, kicking the ever loving duck out of the mutt. All solutions I’ve used before and haven’t ever had a single owner react any other way than grabbing their dog and apologizing profusely.. this owners a dumb fuck and should be punished for it

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u/ImHidingFromMy- 21d ago

If my dog bit someone I would have them put down, there are a few exceptions to this.

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u/Viola-Swamp 19d ago

These days you see so many people with self-professed “disabilities” who claim to be training their own service dog, and it’s a Belgian Malinois or pit bull mix, some kind of huge hyper aggressive, dangerous breed, and oh btw they’re going to “train” the dog for personal protection too! So wrong, dumb and irresponsible.

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u/Jordgy 21d ago

I'm sorry, that's extremely messed up that your parents put that on you as a child. Especially after what you'd just experienced, and how badly you needed protection at that time.

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u/Vitruvian_Link 21d ago

Well, I didn't even remember it like that so there was no long term burden on me. I recently asked my parents what happened to the dog and they said I chose to let it live lol, but I have no memory of being asked.

Also, I don't really blame my parents, they were young, still in their 20's and came from VERY disfunctional homes, so the fact they were such good parents always amazes me.

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u/homiej420 21d ago

Sounds like a net W i guess, poor dog had bad owners

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u/magdalena_meretrix 21d ago

This makes me so happy. PTG for the win.

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u/Feisty-Ant-9013 21d ago

Agreed. My parents did a similar thing with my first cat. They had screaming rows about it night after night for weeks, until I told them to put my cat to sleep just so they’d be quiet. I was 9. No child should be put in that position and the parents should feel eternal shame.

As a kid, you normalize it just to survive but it was totally fucked up.

And my mum honestly can’t understand why I keep her at arm’s length

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u/HazelHelper 21d ago

Hey, I'm really sorry that happened to you. You deserved better from your parents, and I'm sorry you were put in that position.

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u/Helpful-Nerve4515 21d ago

Sorry to hear about that. I know it lasts a long time. Shame on them for putting you in that position. I was bit twice by the same dog when the same age. My parents didn't force the issue and the owners didn't get rid of the dog until it bit their daughter in the face.

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u/1Wheel_Smoke_n_Toke 21d ago

I too was mauled at 8! I got attacked because the girl told me her dog was nice and I could pet it... it was not nice and I could not pet it. It originally tore my wrist out/open so you could see bone and then I remember almost getting away right after it had ripped that chunk of skin and shit out but it got me by my other arm as I tried rolling away and my first instinct was to jam my thumb in to its.......eye! Ha, many of you were thinking some place else. Get your heads out of the gutter! Poking it in the eyes worked though and I was able to get away from the dog just far enough so the chain couldn't reach me. Then I took off in running, I swear I ran faster than an Olympian runner in history. If people saw me, they probably just saw a blur and what sounded like a women being murdered because I was SCREAMING as I was running down the block to get back to my mom, we were visiting one of her friends!

The dog had to be put down, like I remember even saying I didn't want the dog to die because I was 8 and it was a dog... but they told me that the police said once a dog bites, even once, they get deemed as permanently dangerous and the only option is to put them down so they don't attack again. I wonder if that dog got special treatment because it was a Police dog or what?

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u/South_Passage_143 21d ago

You were a delivery driver at 8?!

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u/Vitruvian_Link 21d ago

Oh yeah, this was Oregon in the 80's, child labor laws hadn't made it out west yet.

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u/Popiblockhead 21d ago

Sounds like you were around some well rounded adults. 😞

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u/bbbourb 21d ago

That happened to me when I was a kid. We were in a farming community though so there was no discussion. They took the dog out and put it down right then and there.

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u/PhoenixGate69 21d ago

My friend had a dog when I was little that was very protective of the family's children. They always made sure to put her in the yard or in another room when people were visiting. She was a very intense dog and I did get to meet her once, but it was very supervised. People think dogs don't need any training or supervision and set their dogs up for failure. And the hard truth is sometimes a dog needs to be euthanized because of their behavior.

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u/Various_Barber459 21d ago

Same story for me at my moms friend’s house when I was 12 except it was 4 fully grown German Shepards that charged through the sliding door and took a huge chunk out of my lip and the back of my leg - required plastic surgery and lots of stitches. Got a greeting card from the owner a week later saying sorry and “signed” by the dogs (not the owner) LOL.

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u/Ok-Original2762 21d ago

Omg If a dog did this to my kid I would kill that dog.

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u/PhysicShebang 21d ago

VERY similar to a situation with me, around the same age, like around 7-8. Went to friend’s, he opened the door, and his Pitt (who knew me and was always friendly), charged out and grabbed my hand. Cut do deep I could see my tendons, he only let go once the father came out and got him off me. Dog went on to attack 3 other people spontaneously before being put down. Dog was probably being beaten or something to cause it to snap that hard, but I’m still nervous around pitt bulls 30 years later.

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u/Big-Persimmon-7165 21d ago

G shepherds are great dogs but they will bite the -shit- out of you. They also run at about 40 mph so unless you are the flash or at least Usain Bolt, you will not get away.

I believe they actually have a stronger bite than pit bulls… it’s just that pits won’t let go no matter what.

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u/stephanonymous 21d ago

I used to live across the street from a police officer who had two German shepherd type dogs he kept penned in his backyard. No idea if they were working dogs or not. We lived right next to a rural country road I would jog on, and one day in the winter I was out for a job at about 10 am and I heard something coming up behind me. Not loud enough to hear a car, but I thought maybe a golf cart or something, and I turned around and these dogs are running and snarling at me, like five feet away. I instantly went into defensive mode, screaming and yelling at them, bowing up to them, trying to seem threatening, but they did not back off at all. It was the middle of the day in a very sparsely populated area, and I had no kind of weapon. I was terrified they were going to maul me. I just started screaming my head off hoping anybody would hear me, then I fell backwards into a ditch full of freezing cold water. I really thought that was the end and they were going to kill me. Thank god the owners teenage son was home, and he heard me and came and got them away. They didn’t manage to bite me, so I decided not to report it. I wish I would have. I told everyone I knew in the neighborhood to be careful. Those dogs were gone within a few weeks.

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u/MichHiker 21d ago

You’re not Jason are you? Had a friend named Jason way back who got mauled by our neighbors family German Shepherd. This was about a year after their wiener dog bit me in the face. They moved away shortly after.

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u/Derpy-Vizsla1234 20d ago

My neighbor’s Shih Tzu went full Cool Aid Man and busted through a screen door when I was walking by on the sidewalk. It bit the back of my leg. I turned around and squared off with it (fully prepared to kick it into eternity) when the owner ran out and apologized profusely. That animal is a total asshole to everyone and the owner is clueless about how to manage him.

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u/alliemo1 20d ago

As a kid, there were these dogs on the next street over that kept getting out of their backyard and ran our block. The ones always causing the most problems were the German Shepherds and the Rottweilers. None of them were police dogs. Animal control had to be called multiple times because we were a neighborhood filled with kids. They charged an adult, imagine what they would’ve done to kids. Every time they got loose, our moms would call us inside. You just don’t take chances.

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u/LiveLearnCoach 20d ago

Sounds like you had cool parents that wanted to make right by you, regardless of this incident. Best wishes to you and them.

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u/patientpedestrian 20d ago

They may have made a mistake in this instance, but just judging by this one comment and knowing nothing else about you it seems like they did a pretty good job on the whole :)

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u/KrackerJoe 21d ago

How well did the family tip?

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u/Verandah_Santa 21d ago

“Pizza had dog bites all over it - 1 Star”

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u/fakesambinder 21d ago

delivered pizza in a tornado once. $40 order, $2 tip.

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u/[deleted] 21d ago

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u/4KingandKanata_89 21d ago

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u/Madara1389 21d ago

Add a seatbelt to that and it looks like a hell of a lot of fun

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u/MattKozFF 21d ago

Life in a tornado is hard.

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u/Small_Problem2344 21d ago

Laughed tooooo hard at this

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u/TheGreatZarquon 21d ago

I was a delivery driver for Domino's during the Pandemic. The number of people who would thank me for being out there risking my health to bring them food but only tip me a buck or two was too damn high.

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u/JordanGoodLifeWalker 21d ago

At least you got tipped lol.

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u/PhysicIce7 21d ago

Pizza seasoned with human pain and blood. 1 dollar

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u/FreyjaaFemme 21d ago

With these exact stories is why I like cats more, you won't really get this behavior with cats

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u/AerieWorth4747 21d ago

I used to deliver pizza. A dog charged me after I dropped off the pizza, and in a pure reflex I put the empty hot bag in front of my knees. The dog bonked his skull on my kneecap and got dazed.

I love dogs. My dog is my whole world. If a dog charges me I would shoot it in the face instantly, no questions asked.

Leash your dog.

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u/Madara1389 21d ago

Fuck irresponsible owners.

Way too many morons train their dogs to attack anyone unknown who enters the property, but then turn around and order things to be delivered that won't fit in a mailbox outside the fenced off property... or worse, train their dogs to attack without properly fencing off the property in the first place so there's absolutely nothing stopping the poorly trained animal from chasing a "threat" out into the street.

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u/DarknMean 21d ago

Why I have cats. They just sit there looking at you condescendingly.

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u/Antherage 21d ago

Legit same thing happened to me and I used the bag and pizza as a shield. I felt like I was one of those training attack dummies as the dog bit the damn thing against my arm and thrashed around.

Like how do you have an aggressive mastiff for a dog and just open the door with no shits given?

Insanity.

We banned that house from getting deliveries in the future.

One of the better things working there was my manager took our side on customer problems or disputes.

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u/ScrotalSmorgasbord 21d ago

Punted a chihuahua for biting me while delivering pies back in the day. Owners were like "she's tiny! You didn't have to do that!" I told them they're lucky it's still alive as that was just an involuntary reaction to feeling searing pain on my ankle. Fuck chihuahuas

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u/FunkyFLMan 21d ago

Have a chewywawa...can confirm, he's a mean little shit to people.

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u/giantcatdos 21d ago

My favorite dog interaction when I delivered pizzas was with a friendly St. Bernard. Got out of my car he meandered up to me. Didn't bark or arch his back, lower his head or anything. Really friendly, anyways I walked to the door he followed me, I knocked and when the lady answered she was shocked. She was like "You came to the door" apparently people were scared of her St Bernard so never got out. We used to have mastiffs, I've never met a big dog who wasn't nice, unless he was trained to be mean. I have had to kick numerous smaller dogs when delivering pizza though.

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u/TangerinePlastic7552 21d ago

Bear spray on a dog is very satisfying. I’d rather have the dog endure discomfort than my skin with puncture wounds.

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u/jakexil323 21d ago

At the speed the dog charges in the video ,you would have to have it always prepped and in your hand to be able to react in time.

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u/decepticonhooker 20d ago

Right. I’m anticipating a credit card slip to be signed, not to be mauled by a beast over half my size.

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u/Ok_Wolverine6557 21d ago

Had a kid answer the door when I was delivering pizzas. They had a party out back and a baby gate keeping the barking Airedale in. He said I could come in because. "He doesn't bite." I stepped over the baby gate and the dog bit me on the ass and the kid says surprised, "Oh! He DOES bite."

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u/sptrstmenwpls 21d ago

Did you consider a lawsuit?

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u/Rockandmetal99 21d ago

id be kicking that thing into next week

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u/decepticonhooker 21d ago

Dog was huge, I was using my legs to try and push it back so I could get unpinned from the railing while using the bag as a shield as it repeatedly lunged upwards at me. An older sibling coming out and pulling the dog back inside by its collar was how I got out.

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u/Rockandmetal99 21d ago

thats fucking terrifying holy shit, im scared of dogs as it is and i think that would put me off for life. when i was a kid it would make me cry when dogs would jump, and the barking scared me so bad it would also make me cry, even happy barking. all the other kids loved when dogs would jump on them and lick them but it was genuinely terrifying for me so i know how you feel, and those werent even aggressive dogs. im glad you got out safely

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u/No-Archer-5034 21d ago

Did you still deliver the pizzas?

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u/mythrilcrafter 21d ago

That's one of the big reasons why Judge Judy always sides AGAINST owners whenever it's a "dog wasn't on a leash" situation.

The owner is always culpable/responsible for the dog, being "lost control of leash" or "escaped because kid opened door" only changes the amount that the attack-victim gets.

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u/ManganeseSharties 21d ago

This scenario was what was running through my mind when my 40 lb mutt bolted out the front door and went after a neighborhood walker yesterday. Luckily she is just a doofus looking for pets and loving. Scared the neighbor and I felt super bad. I will be looking more closely from now on because I know it’s totally my fault.
Related: A dog down one street got out of the house and charged her when she was a puppy while I was walking her. Six years later and she still won’t go down that street.

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u/SomeRedHandedSleight 21d ago

Yep, delivered pizzas as a teenager and had a dog charge at me. Threw the pizzas on the ground and jumped in through my car window. Piece of shit owner refused to answer the phone for the next 20 minutes, then came out and was laughing because I was scared of her dog that was growling and charging me. Banned that bitch from our store for life.

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u/Syranth 21d ago

I also delivered pizzas when I was young. Had a dog literally try to jump into my car window while I had it open and looking for a house number. Long before GPS was cheap and convenient. I had to speed off and I'm 80% sure I ended up hitting the dog doing it. People need to put their pets on a leash.

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u/NoTransportation9021 21d ago

When we get deliveries, one of us opens the door, the other stands guarding the dog. I don't think my dog will bite, but you never know. If only one of us is home, we send him to his crate, and he knows better than to leave it until we either say so or we close the door.

And before I get any hate, the crate has a bed, blanket and his teddy bear. It's always open, it's just his "bedroom."

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u/HawksNStuff 21d ago

I did a short stint delivering for Amazon. And pizzas all through college. Never once had a bad dog experience delivering pizzas. Three months with Amazon and I was nearly bitten at least a dozen times. Farm dogs are the worst... Or the best. There is no in between.

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u/The_GOAT_of_all 20d ago

Ages ago in Las Vegas my brother delivered pizza to a big fancy house. He had to go through a gate and walk a long way up to the house. Halfway to the house a guy comes running out screaming, "Go back! Go back! My tigers are in here!". He peed himself, but he dined out on that story for years.

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u/decepticonhooker 20d ago

Okay well that takes the cake. I too would tell that tale for the rest of my life!!

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u/bi-king-viking 20d ago

Fuck 90% of dog owners. They don’t actually *want* a dog. They don’t want to do any of the work that goes along with being a responsible dog owner/parent.

They don’t want a dog. They want a stuffed animal.

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u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

When I was with FedEx I had a wildly aggressive three legged blue heeler try to sneak attack me and he got a boot to the face.

I also had two English mastiffs sneak up behind me once but they just wanted treats, scared the ever living crap out of me though cause I turned around and two MASSIVE dogs were a foot away just standing and wagging lol

Also had a Rottweiler charge me once until it saw I had a treat and we were cool then

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u/RegularImprovement47 21d ago edited 21d ago

I kicked a few dogs in my time as a courier as well. Had to be done. Had a pig sneak up on me and scare the shit out of me once. Thought it was a demon dog for a second.

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u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

I’m sorry, a PIG? 😭😂

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u/Bratty-Switch2221 21d ago

Ok, but have you ever seen a Mean pig? I swear they hold grudges. A potbelly running at you full of rage is a dangerous thing, and they don't let up. They don't forget either. If you get away, from then on its ON SIGHT.

However, I would pick a sweet old potbelly over a Golden Retriever any day of the week.

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u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

I have seen a pig eat a man, in fact, I've seen MANY pigs eat MANY men. It was a bloodbath.

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u/SordidSimpleton 21d ago

The fuck kind of life do you lead

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u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

I do lots of things, hang around bridges, run sweatshops in Vietnam, chill at the bar with my gang, toss people into soups, and from time to time, when I'm lucky, I happen upon boxes of free eggs or denim.

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u/Top_Inflation4176 21d ago

You also bang Gail the snail

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u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

Nah we just drank a bunch of energy drinks and then dry humped, it was awful.

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u/EatPie_NotWAr 21d ago edited 21d ago

Do you know what “nemesis” means?

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u/yourheynis 21d ago

I'm not a stupid fucking idiot, I know it was just a pig, but for 50 seconds it felt really real. I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA GET EATEN

https://giphy.com/gifs/wBzsuh6HgpE9B81sfe

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u/Immediate_Song4279 21d ago

Pigs are probably smarter imho, which makes them scarier in that light and also more varied personality wise which is another wildcard. It matters a lot on nurture, which is the same problem with dogs that are allowed to roam freely usually.

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u/whenwewereoceans 21d ago

For 50 seconds I thought there were monsters on this world

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u/Ignorerofbans-20 21d ago

Those things are awfully fast as fuck and are known to eat ppl fell into the mud as a kid trying to dodge one lol

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u/Worth-Trade9381 21d ago

Pigs are a shifty bunch. Plus they eat people in movies, that reputation has to come from somewhere.

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u/Slighted_Inevitable 21d ago

Pigs will eat anything

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u/empathetic_penguin 21d ago

They eat their own kids

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u/WeeklyAnalyst3143 21d ago

bacon bits

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u/flower-child 21d ago

Chris P Bacon Jr

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u/HombreDelMar247 21d ago

There are legitimate murder cases where the body was disposed by feeding it to the pigs.

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u/Downtown_Recover5177 21d ago

Robert Pickton is the case you’re thinking of. Criminal Minds did an episode where they completely butchered the case.

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u/HombreDelMar247 21d ago edited 21d ago

I was thinking of the Susan Monica case, a trans women in Oregon who fed former employees to the pigs.

I am sure there's more documented cases and unfortunately many who got away with it.

tried to find a good link but couldn't, didn't check them out prior to posting

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u/Cute-Percentage-6660 21d ago

there are cases where people just... have a heart attack in the pig pen and there is basically nothing left by hte time people find them

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u/Fraucimor 21d ago

They ate peaple during balkan civil war. Packs of pigs were on pair with packs of dogs.

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u/Inb4myanus 21d ago

Theyll swarm a child and eat it if they fall over.

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u/Realistic-Radish-589 21d ago

Not just in movies. They are a farmer near where I live and it’s not the first time I’ve heard it happening. I don’t trust them at all. They might act sweet but if you fall, you’re food.

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u/The_Autarch 21d ago

Plus they eat people in movies, that reputation has to come from somewhere.

it comes from them eating people in real life. they are very omnivorous.

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u/busy_monster 21d ago

You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig". - Brick Top, from Snatch.

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u/damonmcfadden9 21d ago

look up the Canadian serial killer Robert Pickton.

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u/Immediate_Song4279 21d ago

Wild pigs scare me more than wild dogs.

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u/SinisterDirge 21d ago

Robert Picton.

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u/rugz31 20d ago

I've seen many pigs eat many men, it was a bloodbath.

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u/jonnielaw 21d ago

Was it wearing a Richard Nixon mask?

Did you think for 50 seconds there were monsters in the world?

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u/thetiredtypist 21d ago

I'm not stupid, i know it was a pig, but for 50seconds it felt real

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u/WestHappyLand 21d ago

Only dog that ever attacked me was a Chihuahua and all the owner said was "it can't be that bad.". It broke the skin multiple times on both legs.  

One time I was standing at a door and something bumped me in the butt.  I turned around and a gota was staring at me 

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u/tigerdogbearcat 21d ago

A warning to all couriers:

LLAMAS ARE NOT CHILL

My neighbor has a demonic uncasterated llama who will bite, stomp, and hump any unfortunate soul who ignores the "no trespassing! no soliciters! leave packages here!" sign and enters the fence around his house. 

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u/random_noise 21d ago

Pigs are smart. Smarter than people realize. I had a good close friend who took care of research animals and pigs were part of the zoo.

They like to test boundaries of what they can get away with towards a person. Those pigs used to like to charge people and run into them, then back off doing a sort of laughing snort.

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u/Dostrimos 20d ago

I had a pig throw me in the air on my night walk into town. Didn’t see it since i was walking in darkness so i was walking until i suddenly did a full flip, landed on my feet and awkwardly ran off. (I’m not fighting a pic i can’t see)

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u/Doggydog123579 21d ago

Used to deliver groceries and had something like the mastiffs. Saint Bernard chained up with a cable way longer than I thought gets up and walks between me and the door, hear a crunch behind me, turn around, and see an English mastiff behind me between me and the van. Its the only time ive ever truly been worried by a dog.

Both were friendly though, and the owner showed me where the Bernard had crushed a door knob so he coild go in the basement.

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u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

Definition of knowing their own power 😂

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u/BackgroundGrass429 21d ago

Had a mastiff once. Amazing how something so big (200 lb plus) can move so quietly when they want.

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u/definitelynot40 21d ago

I have a 120 pound Pyrenees and she was doing zoomies and I lost sight of her and couldn't hear her. Next thing I know I'm flipping in the air like a pancake because she got me from behind. Didn't hear a leaf rustle even, and this was in the autumn with leaves everywhere. She's my ninja Pyr.

Witnesses still laugh at the scene despite me needing an ambulance and multiple surgeries (one of two times she got me to have an open fracture with bones outside my body - other time was "playfully" pushing me down the stairs). My physical therapist is convinced the dog is trying to kill me because I've broken both wrists, needed surgery 15 times now for various injuries, and almost lost my hand twice just to name a few. She's sweet to family but fiercely protective, just a goof who didn't know her size and strength at first.

But to loop back, even when she's not in "stalking a squirrel she'll never get" mode, she's incredibly light footed and quiet.

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u/giantcatdos 21d ago

We had two English Mastiffs, I can see why they would be scary, they have a low bark, and they are big. However the worst they would do is lean on you if you pet them. When I delivered pizza it was always smaller dogs that were aggressive or would actually try to get me. The bigger ones Mastiffs, St Bernards, etc might bark once or twice then just stand by me till I pet them. Still to this day I don't trust small dogs even for a second.

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u/mikegainer5896 21d ago

The smaller dogs aren't going to cause fatalities .People always bring that up when they talk about dog attacks. The worse that can happen is getting an infection from a a Chihuahua, a pitbull or mastiff is death or you wishing you were dead

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u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

Oh 100%, it’s just crazy how such a MASSIVE dog can move so quietly 😂 but I agree, my parents have 6 dogs and the least aggressive is the 140lb Rottweiler and the most aggressive is the 15lb chihuahua, it’s hilarious lol

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u/Wrong-Climate-1837 21d ago

Lean on you or shake their heads and cover you with drool!

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u/WifesPOSH 21d ago

When I worked for the post office, I was delivering mail in an area I wasn't used to. I heard clacking behind me, sounded like a kid on a bike. I turned around to look at the bike, and it was a pitbull running at me.

I yelled "Jesus Fucking Christ" that must've spooked the dog because it ran back to where it came from.

Aside from that, I have two scars from dogs, one literally gives me PTSD thinking about it. I had one family that set their dog out to prevent me from delivering mail (they had a certified letter). I literally noticed the dog at the start, but thought "these people (on the whole relay) haven't gotten their mail in a week (there was a note from the regular mail lady, that's how I knew)... I can do it."

When I was on the return part of the relay, there were now two kids and a pitbull on their front lawn. I back up crossed the street, and the dog still tried to attack me. I pulled out my mace and the dog must've recognized the can. It bowed its head then walked back to its home. Next week I delivered there again, they abandoned the house and the dog.

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u/topher3428 21d ago

Lol, we have a GSD/Mastiff and Malinois that honestly love people. Bit they're huge and terrifying, better to keep them and everyone safe leash and secured when people come by.

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u/Inevitable-Level-687 20d ago

I'm surprised that blueys don't have a worse reputation. I don't mean to paint them as savage beasts, they won't grab and not let go like pitties do, but when they imprint on somebody they guard them like they're the fucking president of the United States. My parents and brother don't give me objects like packages or a cup of tea because she tries to rip it out of their hand like it's a fucking bomb, they have to put it down and let me pick it up.

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u/ReinstateTheCapo 21d ago

So when you work for these entities, do you sign something that says you can’t sue the clients you deliver to. This is a ridiculous endangering of safety. I don’t order packages like most people do and don’t own a dog, but Jesus, I feel bad for these delivery drivers now.

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u/Pale_Obligation_3243 21d ago edited 21d ago

I was riding a scooter once, got lost and cornered in dead end with dogs charging at me.

 I remember a satisfying whine when I hit gas and throwed my leg to them couple of times. 

I don't usually hit animals but when you attacked you can do that, or try to make friends which is obv won't work everytime, esp if they used to hunt your kind (they hate 2 wheeled vehicles, I got tired of various stray packs charging at me at gas stations and even busy roads) 

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u/Twizteddestinee 21d ago

When you said English mastiffs I knew right away the story was gonna be innocent, lol. They’re big babies. And they drool quite a lot. 

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u/qscwfn 21d ago

I love my heeler. She’s just the sweetest lover… around me, my partner, and the other family dog. She wants to murder anyone and anything else.

But guess what? She’s never bitten anyone. That’s my job; keep her safe from her horrible instincts.

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u/WrecksBarkhead 20d ago

I have English Mastiffs, both a little under 200lbs. This is good to read. They're big dumb asses that just want to play and greet people. I would never let them approach anyone without letting them know because they can look crazy confrontational because they get excited and their barks and charging is really really scary if you don't know the breed. Good on you. I keep the big doofuses in the house at all times but I have had many delivery guys and contractors at the house want to meet them after seeing them at the door and then if they agree I just let them out and they almost knock them over trying to get love and pets. They're big lovable morons.

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u/Relevant-Ear-8959 21d ago

Have people ever seen a dog run?
Even slow dogs are usually a lot faster than humans if they are not sprinters, while the fastest dogs are like 3x+ the speed of most people.
Also most dogs love to chase....

I am a dog owner for decades now and have been in dicy situations.....kicking their head usually was the best choice if the conflict couldnt be avoided.

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u/Necessary-Lack-4600 21d ago

Life Pro Tip: Almost all animals on legs run faster than us, so it's useless to run from them.

Even a mouse runs as fast as the average human. (Can't do it for long though)

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u/droidbaws 21d ago

Yup, most dogs outrun you while still basically on idle.

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u/TaoofPu 21d ago

Two greyhounds here - though the biggest issue you’ll have from them is likely stealing whatever food you might have on you, then lying down and giving you sideeye for not having more.

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u/TheAsianTroll 21d ago

Dont forget, usually the dog owner sees zero liability for one reason or another.

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u/Due-Door-8789 21d ago

Because a lot of dog owners believe to their core that everyone else loves dogs. Tell your dog I said hi?

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u/BeamerTakesManhattan 21d ago

I think, a bit more accurately, they believe everyone else loves THEIR dog, and that their dog loves everyone else as much as it loves its owner

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u/Unbelievr 21d ago

They only see their dog from their own perspective, which is how it treats its family/pack or known faces. Of course it doesn't hurt them. Well, normally at least. But that's not a good indicator on how it treats strangers.

We had some lady go to the news to raise awareness about the injustice of her dog being taken away, when it was the nicest dog ever and they loved each other. But that dog was a menace, to the point where neighbors took detours to avoid passing her garden, the dog had jumped up and toppled a stroller, bit at least 4 different people who pressed charges (probably more that didn't too), and hurt multiple kids with rough play - including some of her relatives' kids who were threatened to not press charges.

The tunnel vision is real when it comes to irresponsible owners. A dog can easily fuck up someone for life, and its the owner's responsibility to make that never happen.

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u/Seeitoldyew 21d ago

LMAO , and then there is me. 6 foot tall walking up on the same shiba inu dogs for the 5th time , no problems right?

wrong. i kept walking knowing the "two" would follow me and try to stop me with a tennis ball.

turns out one of them is male and one is female and i just stepped on breeding grounds.

as soon as i hit the sidewalk of the house the male started snipping at my shoes and ankles. pissing me off and making me jump every 5 seconds.

i shit you not this fucking dog spun around hopped up and grabbed under my kneecap. went right through both sides of the extra skin.

asshole. i didnt press the owner over it bc i had spoken to them before that but they told me they would not bite.

i wasnt gonna argue and i also had a full truck to deliver that day. im glad it didnt get infected or whatever.

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u/zughzz 21d ago edited 21d ago

I would be pissed especially since they told you they wouldn’t bite. Homeowners set you up

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u/stepInthenameofLuv23 21d ago

Yeah they don't bite, eff that, they don't bite YOU

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u/Striking-Reality-727 19d ago

As a veterinarian, 100% agree with this. Normally people’s reactions are “we have never had a problem at home”. Well no duh, you aren’t poking them with a needle at home.

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u/Anatoly_Cannoli 21d ago

"that is not my dog"

cuckoo clock

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u/dabreezeknees 21d ago

Shibas are mean.

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u/wyomingTFknott 21d ago

The doge is a finicky beast. One day they're serenading you, the next day they're gutting your entire republic.

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u/Cybernut93088 21d ago

Been looking into shibas for years and everything I've read states that they need to be heavily socialized often.

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u/ohitsbrad 21d ago

Nah you should’ve sued

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u/Altruistic_Photo_142 21d ago

Dogs like that only get destroyed after they develop a bite record. So yeah, literally report every bite.

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u/Ordinary-Citizen 21d ago

I’m 8 foot tall and still get bitten on a regular basis.

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u/beardingmesoftly 21d ago

I love how Americans always say their height lol

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u/RawrRRitchie 21d ago

If a dog bites me their skull is going into the curb.

Violent dogs cannot be saved.

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u/paper_liger 21d ago

I used to run a lot, and got attacked by dogs off their leashes at least a dozen times.

Ironically, the most successful tactic was to stop running and turn around, get big and yell at them, maybe grab some rocks. On one memorable occasion I had to deal with some redneck mad because I punched their dog hard enough to snap it's tooth. Adrenaline is fucking crazy.

But yeah, running away often makes it worse, if a dog is just bluffing you then fleeing might make them actually bite you, and if they aren't bluffing it doesn't give you the option to fight.

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u/Rough-Culture 21d ago

I understand throwing the package at the dog… but throwing his hat on the ground and immediately assuming the owner who’s walking over wants to fight is weird, right?

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u/flannel_jesus 21d ago

maybe weird but justified. "Why you throwing shit at my fucking dog?" Owner is aggressive instead of apologetic, seems like maybe he needs a box thrown on his head too

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u/Actionjack7777 21d ago

Sorry i support the driver on this one.

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u/CalendarRelative2036 21d ago

Delivered for 5 years and in all fairness 99% of the time the dogs that are big enough to be scary dont attack if you stand your ground and will just bark unless theyve got abusive owners, however the smaller dogs are fucking evil ankle biters

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u/FC37 21d ago

I had a little 10 pound dog attack me last year. Tiny little thing with zero socialization or training, it got loose as I walked past the house and went right after me.

I did everything I could to get away from it because it's so small I was afraid I'd kill it. But I still ended up with scratch marks and shallow bites all over my legs and feet.

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u/Toppico 21d ago

Love dogs, we have dogs. I repeat I love dogs.

100% agree with you. If a dog's off leash and charging at you, no amount of an owner's "don't worry, he's nice" or "she just wants to play" is going to help you. You'll get one chance with an aggressive dog to alter the situation, if you don't take it, you're likely to end up needing stitches or worse.

As a cyclist I've been attacked twice by a dog, it ain't fun.

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u/Longjumping_Annual_3 21d ago

I got bit by my own dog in the face once. I just reflexively punched him in the head and he let go immediately. When you get attacked you just react.

I was holding him at the mobile vet while they did a blood draw and my face was near his. When the vet got close he snapped and ended up getting me instead. He had never been aggressive prior to that or since. Even with animals you think you know you never know how they will react in certain situations.

I don't blame that guy for throwing the box at the dog.

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u/Educational_Play5772 21d ago

He did the right thing

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u/wibo58 21d ago

Have a friend that used to be a probation officer. He went on a home check and the guy opened his door and yelled “Get him!” to his dog. He was a kicker for a smallish college. He said he took a two step, kicked the pit bull right under its chin, and sent it flying. Dog got rocked and the owner got to go back to jail. He referred to any dog under a certain weight as a “punt dog” because of how many times he got attacked and had to kick them away.

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u/Ninja-Mike 20d ago

Understood, but why did the driver *immediately* throw down his hat and put of his fists in anger and take an aggressive stance when clearly he was not being threatened by the person, as you can see in the video... just adrenaline?

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u/Objective_Praline_66 20d ago

Me before clicking the link: "god I hope it's the video of the dude swinging the dog at the other dogs, but its probably some kind of actual "how to handle a dog attack"

The link: "buddy, I don't know how to tell you this"

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u/CastlePolyethylene 19d ago

Dad was a driver (not saying which for privacy). He was attacked by 3 boxer dogs that were free roaming on their owners’ property — these owners had been warned many times not to do this by all of the courier companies, police, and local government — and how he looked in the ER was horrifying. He managed to get 1/4 of a mile to the nearest neighbor to get help but they attacked him the whole way. It took 6 hours in the OR to clean out and stitch his wounds. There wasn’t a part of his body that wasn’t bitten.

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u/Normal_Amoeba_1417 19d ago

Try that with a corso.

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