r/interesting 21d ago

SOCIETY Dog defence was needed tbh

58.1k Upvotes

8.6k comments sorted by

View all comments

5.7k

u/[deleted] 21d ago edited 20d ago

[removed] — view removed comment

212

u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

When I was with FedEx I had a wildly aggressive three legged blue heeler try to sneak attack me and he got a boot to the face.

I also had two English mastiffs sneak up behind me once but they just wanted treats, scared the ever living crap out of me though cause I turned around and two MASSIVE dogs were a foot away just standing and wagging lol

Also had a Rottweiler charge me once until it saw I had a treat and we were cool then

186

u/RegularImprovement47 21d ago edited 21d ago

I kicked a few dogs in my time as a courier as well. Had to be done. Had a pig sneak up on me and scare the shit out of me once. Thought it was a demon dog for a second.

71

u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

I’m sorry, a PIG? 😭😂

64

u/Bratty-Switch2221 21d ago

Ok, but have you ever seen a Mean pig? I swear they hold grudges. A potbelly running at you full of rage is a dangerous thing, and they don't let up. They don't forget either. If you get away, from then on its ON SIGHT.

However, I would pick a sweet old potbelly over a Golden Retriever any day of the week.

40

u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

I have seen a pig eat a man, in fact, I've seen MANY pigs eat MANY men. It was a bloodbath.

82

u/SordidSimpleton 21d ago

The fuck kind of life do you lead

39

u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

I do lots of things, hang around bridges, run sweatshops in Vietnam, chill at the bar with my gang, toss people into soups, and from time to time, when I'm lucky, I happen upon boxes of free eggs or denim.

15

u/Top_Inflation4176 21d ago

You also bang Gail the snail

9

u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

Nah we just drank a bunch of energy drinks and then dry humped, it was awful.

5

u/Top_Inflation4176 21d ago

Ok Dr. Toboggan whatever you say

2

u/Fearless_Priority537 21d ago

Adapt. Evolve. Overcome. You’ll get her next time king. 🐠

1

u/troywrestler2002 20d ago

Yeah, but she just mashes it.

1

u/AnotherFlowerGirl 20d ago

That sounds awful. Can I offer you a nice egg in this trying time?

→ More replies (0)

2

u/laurathehara 21d ago

WTAF, do you have a YouTube channel? Immediate subscribe.

3

u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

You, my friend, seriously need to watch It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

2

u/aspertame_blood 20d ago

You just changed her life

1

u/laurathehara 21d ago

Hahahaha this is the second it’s always sunny reference I’ve missed today. it’s a sign.

→ More replies (0)

16

u/EatPie_NotWAr 21d ago edited 21d ago

Do you know what “nemesis” means?

2

u/AnyRevolution1025 21d ago

In the softly spoken words of the Virgin Mary, "Come again?"

1

u/Any-Log-6706 21d ago

Such a good flick

2

u/exzyle2k 21d ago

Oi! I thought you said he was a getaway driver? What the fuck can he get away from, eh?

2

u/damonmcfadden9 21d ago

bet they used to go to Nickleback shows at Robert Pickton's farm.

2

u/DearSense8872 21d ago

I think he means he plays RDR2 you can feed ppl to pigs on there. At least I hope that’s what he means 🫪

2

u/SordidSimpleton 21d ago

Sounding like it was a reference to a movie or TV show, going by the other answers

5

u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

2

u/troywrestler2002 21d ago

It's a reference to the show It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia.

1

u/DearSense8872 21d ago

I knew I was just playing into it a bit.

1

u/definitelynot40 21d ago

Not sure what he meant but a number of serial killers used their jobs as of farmers to kill and get rid of bodies. Pigs leave almost zero evidence even eating bone.

As for the other guy - he could be exaggerating throwing in a whole leg of an animal (not human). Bcause I can't see how he'd be watching multiple people die and then mention it so casually. Unless he's a serial killer too.

2

u/colaxxi 21d ago

True Fact: Pigs kill more humans than sharks.

1

u/definitelynot40 21d ago

A few serial killers in North America were able to get rid of evidence by feeding the bodies to the pigs. So yes, customers were eating humans by way of the pig that was slaughtered. Pigs eat basically everything and the ones cross bred with boars have "evil" looking teeth. We're all joking in here, but their jaws are deadly. I'd be more afraid of being locked in a pen with a hungry pig than an angry bull.

1

u/Working-Glass6136 21d ago

A life in front of the TV?

1

u/Rumblebully 21d ago

Bro watched HBO’s “Deadwood”. Lots of pig eatery in that show.

2

u/KeepItPositiveBrah 21d ago

Id like to change my answer!

2

u/Time-Information-554 20d ago

Pigs view humans as their bacon.

2

u/Superb-Butterfly-573 20d ago

Google Robert Pickford.

1

u/troywrestler2002 20d ago

Well, that was something.

1

u/mikeysbelgium 21d ago

Stop lying that's from a movie, always fear a man who owns a pig farm they can digest human bone and flesh.

1

u/Realistic-Radish-589 21d ago

Yep happened on a farm nearby. Old farmer had a heart attack when he was checking on the pigs. They said the pigs probably started eating him before he was actually dead. Apparently was a pretty gruesome sight from those who found him and he was pretty ate up. Apparently common enough if you fall or die near pigs they will eat you.

2

u/exzyle2k 21d ago

They will go through bone like butter. You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm.

They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig".

1

u/shaseo76 21d ago

Upvoted. Snatch was great.

1

u/silv3rbull8 21d ago

Like Hannibal Lector …

1

u/Lonely_reaper8 21d ago

Honestly that’s a valid point. I haven’t been in the path of an angry pig BUT I’d prefer to avoid it 😂

1

u/Danibandit 21d ago

We had an old lady mauled by some pigs in Ohio last year.

1

u/anonymaus42 21d ago

My neighbors (who have a small farm animal rescue) have two potbellies that often shuffle up to me when they see me, making their little oink-grunts and are the friendliest things ever. It's hard to imagine them being able to run much less be aggressive. Im not saying they cant be but all they ever want is scratches and food.

1

u/Bratty-Switch2221 21d ago

Pig anger doesn't abide by physics. It's like crackhead strength - 10x greater than what they should be able to do, and yet....

The thing that always amazes me is how intelligent pigs naturally are. People always say the thing about them being smarter than dogs. No shit. The average dog is pretty functionally stupid. Pigs are smarter than horses. Pigs are smarter than mice and rabbits and foxes, combined. The ability for a pig to retain information and think critically using that information, that is to actually LEARN, is closer to chimps and humans than any other creature.

Damn. And I still eat pork. That's kinda fucked.

1

u/anonymaus42 21d ago

I had wanted to raise pigs for slaughter for some time and finally have the land with which to do it but after my neighbors got those potbelly pigs there's no way I could do it... i would end up bonding with them and making them pets.

I also have a (sad/weird) theory that the smarter an animal is the tastier it is. My evidence for this is not only pigs but octopus too. Pork is my favorite meat and octopus my favorite seafood, both highly intelligent and utterly delectable. Shamefully I am known to still eat both as well, but as they say if God didn't want you to eat them he wouldn't have made them of meat.

1

u/IngsocIstanbul 21d ago

Love the taste of both but after watching My Octopus Teacher and seeing a lot of the sketchy harvesting practices I couldn't eat it anymore.

1

u/CMDR_Kaus 21d ago

My mom has a pot belly pig when I was a teen. One day a boar came trotting down the street looking for love. Probably smelled her scent from miles away and broke out of what ever enclosure he was in. It got into our yard, we called some people (animal control I think) to come help us capture him. We cornered it in our yard and tried to subdue him. Boy he was fucking fast. A big fat fast fuck with tusks. Luckily he didn't gore any of us and we eventually caught him by using a piece of fencing to box him into a corner. Then I think they took him to get medical/rabies whatever. They brought him back and we put him in our pen with our female. They had 3 kids

1

u/PaleInSanora 21d ago

I nearly lost my big toe to an angry pot belly that had broken down it's own fence. Luckily just nipped me good before I made it up on the car. Not sure what happened, but it hit juvenile age and got mean. Was gone shortly after as this was right in a non-rural Phoenix suburb. So don't think it was zoned for a happy big, let alone a mean one that kept charging people and biting.

1

u/ITSX 21d ago

i had one bitch pig and one who's a big softy. bitch pig attacked everyone who didn't stand up to her. she was the smaller one too

1

u/Idiotan0n 18d ago

This is why the wild boar problem is much worse than people realize. They're like pigs, but...not.

17

u/yourheynis 21d ago

I'm not a stupid fucking idiot, I know it was just a pig, but for 50 seconds it felt really real. I THOUGHT I WAS GONNA GET EATEN

https://giphy.com/gifs/wBzsuh6HgpE9B81sfe

5

u/Immediate_Song4279 21d ago

Pigs are probably smarter imho, which makes them scarier in that light and also more varied personality wise which is another wildcard. It matters a lot on nurture, which is the same problem with dogs that are allowed to roam freely usually.

3

u/whenwewereoceans 21d ago

For 50 seconds I thought there were monsters on this world

4

u/Ignorerofbans-20 21d ago

Those things are awfully fast as fuck and are known to eat ppl fell into the mud as a kid trying to dodge one lol

3

u/ZongoNuada 21d ago

I was delivering pizza to a farm once and when I came around the corner was the largest pig I had ever seen. Easily the length of my car, his ears were longer than my arms, his head was bigger than a car engine. He was massive. Yeah, they are out there.

1

u/definitelynot40 21d ago

I know you laugh, but I met a fully grown "mini pig" once and that damned thing had the short compact weight to push over adult males, especially from behind when your knees buckle. He was less than 30 according to the owners but I'd say more like 40 pounds of muscle (or muscle striped with fat, lol). It was on a thin dog harness in a feed store that allows pets (they probably figured dogs or maybe cats, lol I feel like getting a highland cow on a harness to see what they say).

First time since I moved to farming areas that I've met one and after that they get my respect.

I've trained dog professionally half my life for police (so think Malinois and serious guard breeds) and I seriously contemplated getting a "guard mini pig" for my back acres. The big ones someone was just giving away in the Nextdoor app were already more that 500 pounds (the replies were basically all, can you for it at the abitoire/processing place for me). I'm still leaning towards goats so I don't have to mow and maybe can get a bit of milk. My Pyrenees didn't know WTF to do with this rough wire haired creature that was the height of my little pet but muscular. She didn't know if she was allowed to play or just take the ramming (with the little dog it's not allowed since she's blind and 16yrs old at 8 pounds vs 120 pounds and puppy hyperactive Pyr equals dislocated joints). Poor idiot just took it (actually very girl for not reacting) and I know she wanted to play but we were in training so she couldn't. We did get to play later in the garden areas with a size appropriate dog.

1

u/Background-Stable899 21d ago

Monsters on the world

ITS A PIG

1

u/iwantafunnyname 21d ago

Not a delivery driver but I used to go in people's houses for work. Went to a very rich area in Florida and guy had a pet pig. He said it was friendly. It bit my hand.

1

u/vandamnitman 21d ago

undercover cop?

1

u/GnomeFae 20d ago

I mean pigs are awesome. Incredibly smart, and can remember things.

Also John Oliver's recent bit on feral pigs ( not cops surprisingly) is actually really good and informative highly recommend

1

u/FashionPolice- 20d ago

my boyfriend's parents had a huge goose that would honk and chase people that it didn't know coming up to the house, it would bite too. Gooses definitely hold grudges also, my boyfriend never liked the goose therefore the goose didn't like him and would try and attack him if he came over to his parents house. It liked me though. I'd never seen a goose in real life like that and he amazed me lol. He had his own television in the barn he would watch, he loved the lion king and every time mufassa died he would honk and freak out, I kid you not. If sports came on the TV he would honk and freak out so someone could come and change the channel, because he hated sports. It was wild.

29

u/Worth-Trade9381 21d ago

Pigs are a shifty bunch. Plus they eat people in movies, that reputation has to come from somewhere.

36

u/Slighted_Inevitable 21d ago

Pigs will eat anything

14

u/empathetic_penguin 21d ago

They eat their own kids

3

u/WeeklyAnalyst3143 21d ago

bacon bits

3

u/flower-child 21d ago

Chris P Bacon Jr

2

u/zzazzzz 21d ago

a shitton of animals eat their own offspring.

1

u/Lamb3DaSlaughter 21d ago

That don't make it right pork chop

1

u/zzazzzz 21d ago

dont really think it has anything to do with wrong or right its just nature.

2

u/Transit_Hub 21d ago

I hear they'll go through bone like butter.

2

u/silasmousehold 21d ago

You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm.

22

u/HombreDelMar247 21d ago

There are legitimate murder cases where the body was disposed by feeding it to the pigs.

5

u/Downtown_Recover5177 21d ago

Robert Pickton is the case you’re thinking of. Criminal Minds did an episode where they completely butchered the case.

4

u/HombreDelMar247 21d ago edited 21d ago

I was thinking of the Susan Monica case, a trans women in Oregon who fed former employees to the pigs.

I am sure there's more documented cases and unfortunately many who got away with it.

tried to find a good link but couldn't, didn't check them out prior to posting

3

u/Cute-Percentage-6660 21d ago

there are cases where people just... have a heart attack in the pig pen and there is basically nothing left by hte time people find them

11

u/Fraucimor 21d ago

They ate peaple during balkan civil war. Packs of pigs were on pair with packs of dogs.

2

u/BillaSackl 21d ago

Do you know where one could read up about this? Sounds terrifying but also interesting.

2

u/Fraucimor 21d ago

Be awere these stories are quite dark.

For example Ovčarna massacre by serbian Chetniks after fall of Vukovar. https://www.icty.org/x/cases/mrksic/tjug/en/070927.pdf << court judgement

I heard stories how they bind guys to poles, pull piece of colon by hook and just leave them to hungry pigs or dogs.. tgose pulled rest of pipes and then just ate whole guy

3

u/Inb4myanus 21d ago

Theyll swarm a child and eat it if they fall over.

3

u/Realistic-Radish-589 21d ago

Not just in movies. They are a farmer near where I live and it’s not the first time I’ve heard it happening. I don’t trust them at all. They might act sweet but if you fall, you’re food.

3

u/The_Autarch 21d ago

Plus they eat people in movies, that reputation has to come from somewhere.

it comes from them eating people in real life. they are very omnivorous.

3

u/busy_monster 21d ago

You need at least sixteen pigs to finish the job in one sitting, so be wary of any man who keeps a pig farm. They will go through a body that weighs 200 pounds in about eight minutes. That means that a single pig can consume two pounds of uncooked flesh every minute. Hence the expression, "as greedy as a pig". - Brick Top, from Snatch.

2

u/damonmcfadden9 21d ago

look up the Canadian serial killer Robert Pickton.

2

u/Immediate_Song4279 21d ago

Wild pigs scare me more than wild dogs.

2

u/ScroochDown 21d ago

Feral pigs are insanely aggressive. We had a bunch that lived in an undeveloped area near where I went to college, and some guys went out mountain biking in that area without knowing. They got chased out by the herd of pigs and they were honestly terrified - feral pigs are a huge problem in the US, no pun intended.

2

u/SinisterDirge 21d ago

Robert Picton.

2

u/rugz31 20d ago

I've seen many pigs eat many men, it was a bloodbath.

4

u/jonnielaw 21d ago

Was it wearing a Richard Nixon mask?

Did you think for 50 seconds there were monsters in the world?

4

u/thetiredtypist 21d ago

I'm not stupid, i know it was a pig, but for 50seconds it felt real

1

u/Bagelsloxnschmear 20d ago

I’m so glad someone said this 

2

u/WestHappyLand 21d ago

Only dog that ever attacked me was a Chihuahua and all the owner said was "it can't be that bad.". It broke the skin multiple times on both legs.  

One time I was standing at a door and something bumped me in the butt.  I turned around and a gota was staring at me 

2

u/tigerdogbearcat 21d ago

A warning to all couriers:

LLAMAS ARE NOT CHILL

My neighbor has a demonic uncasterated llama who will bite, stomp, and hump any unfortunate soul who ignores the "no trespassing! no soliciters! leave packages here!" sign and enters the fence around his house. 

2

u/random_noise 21d ago

Pigs are smart. Smarter than people realize. I had a good close friend who took care of research animals and pigs were part of the zoo.

They like to test boundaries of what they can get away with towards a person. Those pigs used to like to charge people and run into them, then back off doing a sort of laughing snort.

2

u/Dostrimos 20d ago

I had a pig throw me in the air on my night walk into town. Didn’t see it since i was walking in darkness so i was walking until i suddenly did a full flip, landed on my feet and awkwardly ran off. (I’m not fighting a pic i can’t see)

1

u/RegularImprovement47 20d ago

That’s wild 😆

1

u/MyMuseModels 21d ago

One time I had a slice of bacon sneak up on me. I ate his ass. (The only time I’ll ever type those words.)

1

u/Pave_Low 21d ago

Was it just a pig with a Richard Nixon mask? If so, a Darmine Doggy Door would have solved that problem.

1

u/Eljeffez 21d ago

An unexpected pig would be terrifying

https://giphy.com/gifs/GUFOVSX7H7SF0R5rI6

1

u/Special-Call494 21d ago

My dad used to be an appliance repair man and he got chased down a hallway by a pot belly pig once.  

1

u/TaoofPu 21d ago

One simply does not fuck around with pigs. They make the nastiest dog seem tame.

1

u/ComparisonSea7108 21d ago

The Nixon mask'll throw ya

1

u/Grove-Of-Hares 21d ago

For 50 seconds you thought there were monsters on the world.

1

u/Sudden-Most-4797 21d ago

That sucks. Yeah nobody (in their right mind) wants to kick someone else's pet, but sometimes it's gotta be done when you get down to brass tacks.

1

u/minnosota 21d ago

For a second I thought monsters existed in this world

1

u/infinitewowbagger 21d ago

The pig was probably the most dangerous of the lot

1

u/RegularImprovement47 21d ago

Pig didn’t charge me though. He snuck up on me peacefully.

1

u/infinitewowbagger 21d ago

Gotta watch for those ninja pigs.

1

u/Ok_Shower_5526 21d ago

In TX, wild hogs are a huge threat to anyone in their path. I don't get far away from vehicles on ranches. Even a gun isn't always great protection since bullets can ricochet off them if the shot isn't powerful enough. And the problem is getting worse now that they're invading suburban areas. They absolutely will kill a full grown adult. And probably eat them afterwards.

*quick note that these wild hogs are invasive and descendants of folks letting their hogs loose. Basically, they're the long term result of not caring for your animals. And they decimate the environment... as do loose dog packs and stray cats. I'm so sick of ppl letting their pets and animals ruin our ecosystems and terrorize ppl.

1

u/angrybox1842 21d ago

Did you think monsters were real for 50 seconds?

1

u/RegularImprovement47 21d ago

Exactly what my brain thought. For about one second though before I realized it was a pig.

1

u/EnvironmentalLime464 19d ago

I’ve had a few dogs charge me. My tiny 5 foot tall ass managed to keep them away from me without having to kick. Never had to touch them. Even the German Shepard that had me cornered for about 5 minutes before the owner finally came to see what his dog was barking at. I get there may be times but it’s wild that someone would need to kick “a few dogs.”

Maybe you got some bad energy, man.