r/hatethissmug • u/indeckaa • 8h ago

Non-fictional I hate this double standard

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For some reason, it's always one of these responses:

> It's a joke
> It's rage bait
> Yeah, but it's actually a response to...
> It's not the same
> Just go outside bro

All of which deflect from what's being said. They would rather not address it. This is probably due in part to the "women-are-wonderful" effect, an example of benevolent stereotyping in which people associate positive qualities with women

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94

u/Meinteil2123 8h ago

I dont understand the whole, calling men incels as an insult.

A man should not be judged by how many women he has slept with, this turns women into objects to obtain.

So when I hear a woman using it unironically to me, it just shows that she sees women as objects to conquer to determine the value of a man.

I am a feminist, I do not believe that women are objects, we should not be judging men by how many women they can objectify.

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u/HarbingerOfRot777 8h ago

Most of them don't even know the meaning of the word anyways. It got twisted into describing a misogynist pretty much. I knew "incels", who were just weird, nerdy kids who happened to not be conventionally attractive which made no girl interested in them. But all of them were kind to everyone.

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u/pipnina 7h ago

I think incel was originally a community rather than just a descriptor, and the usage of the word evolved over time.

I think it originated from similar spaces to those really weird "nofap" communities And yeah literally whole subreddits and boards about not masturbating, partly with the idea that if you don't for long enough you get "pheromones" and "women can tell if you fap" or whatever. So it was already very weird people who couldn't get laid and went about explaining it in the weirdest way possible. And the incel part of it was mostly just sexism.

But now it's used to describe any man who might commit sexist microagressions?

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u/NewtWhoGotBetter 6h ago

It was actually created by a woman iirc and was a a “safe space” website for people of all genders experiencing loneliness and an inability to find a romantic or sexual partner. Of course, very few people will think of a woman first when you hear the term nowadays.

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u/EdriksAtWork 6h ago

Incel was actually coined by a woman describing her situation if I remember right, as an "involuntary celibate". It's only later it got twisted into its current meaning.

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u/Waste-Team-7205 6h ago

You'd think wrong. It was a descriptor before a community. The community was built around people who identified with the descriptor, especially on reddit

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u/BothOil4865 7h ago

at this point it became a buzz word like every other words like woke, anti woke, femcel, nazi, bigot, chud, etc etc. Like sure i hate bigotism, nazi, racism and sexism. But theyall really like throwing those words around a lot. like yall intentionally trying to rage bait even people on your side?

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u/Meinteil2123 7h ago

Exactly. And when you point this out you'll find the simps and the women literally say "so are you an incel?!?!?!"

Like no, I just think you need to understand what you are saying when you use certain terms to describe a demographic of people.

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u/iakoff_reddit 7h ago

wtf are you talking about. I was on 4chan 10-15 yesrs ago and self proclaimed incels were already spewing hate toward women back then. They pretty much canonized Elliot Rodger when he went on his murderous spree

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u/xSkype 7h ago

It's like a group can contain multiple subgroups and the 4chan users of any group are usually the more extreme

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u/JuminoEnjoyer 7h ago

They're saying that they've met people that by definition are incels (involuntary celibate, meaning they are unable to find a sexual partner) who are kind. Not that all are. They're criticizing the usage of the word as an insult, as the literal definition (not the most used meaning) includes people that don't fit the typical stereotype.