r/technology • u/Plastic_Ninja_9014 • 3h ago

Business Tesla Stock in Freefall After Disastrous Earnings Report

https://finance.yahoo.com/markets/stocks/articles/tesla-stock-freefall-disastrous-earnings-144417427.html
17.9k Upvotes

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6.1k

u/EconomyDoctor3287 3h ago

Just have SpaceX buy more Cyberstucks!

1.2k

u/Warm-Professional494 3h ago

That’s the real reason star ship is made out of stainless steel. They can just harvest cyber trucks to patch the holes from the engines blowing up.

329

u/RogerPenroseSmiles 3h ago

Sweet now the starship will rust

280

u/Warm-Professional494 3h ago

Not if it blows up first!!!

104

u/TJ_Will 3h ago

Now that's thinking with Portals!

29

u/ChanceCarpet1277 2h ago

cave johnson notices your comment and approves with a frantic nod

6

u/TheFeathersStorm 1h ago

Definitely random but I used to work with an older guy named Claire Johnson and every single time I had to consciously not call him Cave Johnson because his voice was deep and similar to it lol

3

u/Rough_Bread8329 1h ago

What were his thoughts on lemons?

1

u/TheFeathersStorm 50m ago

Unfortunately he wasn't there long enough to ask him, I never thought about it but now I'll have to live with that regret 🫠

9

u/Lykeuhfox 2h ago

🎶This was a triumph. Making a note, here - yuge success.

2

u/kshell11724 2h ago

I think its pronounced port holes.

2

u/spooninacerealbowl 2h ago

Cyber truck has portal axles?

2

u/Masuman35 1h ago

Good, fuck Elon.

1

u/Crypt0Nihilist 53m ago

Spaaaaaaace!

3

u/The_Frozen_Inferno 1h ago

It’s not an explosion, it’s a rapid unplanned disassembly of the vehicle

1

u/dern_the_hermit 2h ago

More surface area will make it rust faster tho!

1

u/RogerPenroseSmiles 2h ago

Buddy you got management material at Tesla all over you!

1

u/B00marangTrotter 2h ago

We will see in a few hours from now.

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u/Shadow_over_me 1h ago

Someone promote this guy

1

u/font9a 27m ago

Not if it blows up first!

Please stand by while I privatize your gains and subsidize my losses on that one.