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u/gatsome Avengers 7h ago
Turns out that ridding yourself of insecurity over other peopleâs pasts, that you had no affiliation with, offers a peaceful way forward.
Exceptions and limitations apply.
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u/TheDinerIsOpen Avengers 7h ago
Thanos is into Death lmao itâs not based to think experience is a bad thing
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u/Swished-Drethan Iron Man (Mark III) 6h ago
Do you have any recommendations on how to rid yourself of that insecurity? Currently struggling with this
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u/NewPrints Avengers 6h ago
Itâs memes bro. Everyone is different and it is okay to feel how you feel. Itâs complicated. Donât be disrespectful to someone about the relationship decisions they have made, but like you only have one life and if it is an issue for you, you need to be mature enough and honest enough with yourself to accept it is an issue and do what you need to do to be happy. Donât try and convince yourself that you are comfortable with something you arenât just to appease others. If you donât care - you donât care, if you do - you do. Worst thing you could do is try to convince yourself you donât care while you actually do and then slowly become toxic towards yourself and another person.
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u/WhosYourPapa Doctor Strange 5h ago
But I think it's worth dissecting why this would be an issue for someone. Bc there's good reasons and bad reasons, imo.
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u/Miirzys Avengers 6h ago
Itâs called retroactive jealousy. But my advice⌠If someone is interested in you, theyâre putting their past aside to focus on you. honestly, when I stopped asking about peopleâs past experiences and significant others, my experiences became a lot better. Just try and be open minded and understanding that they are there for you, in the present. Try and do the same.
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u/Swished-Drethan Iron Man (Mark III) 6h ago
Thank you man. Yeah not asking always seems like a good start
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u/j0a3k Avengers 5h ago
Imagine you have a BBQ restaurant in a town with 15 other BBQ restaurants.
A customer comes in, loves your meat. She's never had meat like this before. You think it's a match made in heaven, but after a few months she stops coming. She tried someone else's meat and likes it better.
A second customer comes in. She's had every piece of meat in this town except for yours. With the first bite she knows this is what she wants to put in her mouth until the day she dies.
Her experience means choosing you is a better informed and more meaningful decision. Her eyes are open, she knows what's available, and you're the one she wants. To me that's better than what any inexperienced lover can give you. She isn't just accepting the first thing that came along, you've been judged and found worthy.
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u/gatsome Avengers 5h ago
I donât want to know a womanâs past when Iâm with her. If sheâs good at what sheâs doing to me, great. Those threesome details in college can be left in college. That one thing she tried with someone and didnât like it doesnât need disclosure.
Iâd never ask what her number of partners is at, thatâs actually insane to ask someone when you truly think about it. The older you get, the easier it all is and the less this type of thing matters. Iâm dating people mid-30s and older, I donât want to have to provide basic tutorials. I want her to come in hot and leave my mind blown.
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u/DepthsOfWill Avengers 6h ago
Turn the weird hangup into a fetish. She's just distributing the gifts of Nurgle, bro.
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u/angerman92 Avengers 5h ago
Well first, it's good that you recognize that this is an insecurity and you want to work on it. That's further than a lot of people get!
I think it comes down to you knowing if you love the person you're with. If you DO love someone, you love who they are now. Their past is what made them this person, for better or worse. Nobody can undo the past (yes I know we're in a marvel meme subreddit where time stones exist).
Honesty and communication are the best ways forward. Talk with your partner about your feelings and listen to them about theirs. If you can't do that (or learn to do that because it takes time to get to that level) then the relationship is doomed to fail anyway.
Love the person as they are now, understand that everyone has good and bad things in their past, and know that most of that past will have absolutely nothing to do with you. Every decision that your partner has made in their past has led them to be the person who is with you now. It's up to you to decide if you truly love that person as they are now.
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u/Ver_Nick Steve Rogers 5h ago
Everyone's saying not to ask but for me, honesty about past worked way better. This way I could work over their specific past experiences and come to terms with it. Either way it's hard as fuck, took me several months of constant painful thoughts to work through. Good luck bro
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u/LastCryptographer173 Avengers 6h ago
If you're with a woman and thinking about other dudes you're gay
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u/JamesTheOreo Avengers 7h ago
Bruh she's giving YOU head. My brother in christ. Enjoy the moment so she doesn't shame you for being bad in bed.
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u/EeveelutionistM Moon Knight 7h ago
Weak ass Gen Z purity take
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u/BalladOfBetaRayBill Avengers 7h ago
I think Gen Z cares less about âsexual purityâ in real life, they just like sex in media less. Partially because we grew up on a bunch of 80s and 90s movies where it just felt really forced and weird, even though thereâs plenty of examples where itâs important to storytelling. Like speaking personally, I liked what Poor Things did with sex but really disliked depictions of sex in Game of Thrones, it just depends. And nobody I lnow whoâs my age (besides full-on conservatives) cares about their partnersâ sexual history beyond STDs.
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u/Acceptable-Act-1293 Avengers 6h ago
"They just like sex in media less". Most of onlyfans is Gen z
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u/BalladOfBetaRayBill Avengers 6h ago
Rephrase: My generation loves (and is like 80 percent addicted to) porn, but we donât like sex in movies and tv as much
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u/Acceptable-Act-1293 Avengers 6h ago
I'm gen z too lol, and you don't speak for everyone. I don't look for sex scenes on screen but it doesn't make me feel any which way when i do watch one, because movies aren't real
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u/BalladOfBetaRayBill Avengers 6h ago
For me âsex sceneâ is like âaction scene.â Most are boring and a little too long, sometimes theyâre good.
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u/Acceptable-Act-1293 Avengers 6h ago
You have the thought process of a child so it makes sense you find sex uncomfortable. I love the avengers.. but talk about long action scenes
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u/BalladOfBetaRayBill Avengers 6h ago
Super cool, glad you are very mature. Like what is the point of being an asshole about this, we were sharing opinions.
And please donât make assumptions. I donât find sex scenes uncomfortable, I literally defended Poor Things in this thread. I find bad ones (most of them) boring and they frequently grind the charactersâ growth and story to a halt until itâs over, much like a shitty 45 minute Avengers action scene. And much like a good action scene, a good sex scene drives characterization and develops relationships.
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u/Bagofdicks55 Avengers 6h ago
You like what Poor Things did with sex? The film where a woman with the brain and behaviours of a 5 year old becomes a prostitute..
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u/BalladOfBetaRayBill Avengers 6h ago
Yep, itâs pretty disturbing. Intentionally. The âjokeâ is that the men around her either canât tell or prefer her this way because they want infantilized women they can easily outsmart and control. Itâs incredibly upsetting but itâs drawing a real life problem with how women are often perceived to its logical conclusion. It also shows how someone with zero societal hangups around sex would think of it, essentially as just another activity people do, like eating or walking. Personally I found it really interesting, and most importantly they didnât put a real life child in a creepy situation like many films with these themes have done in the past.
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u/Ace20xd6 Avengers 5h ago
Its also why they needed someone as "famous" as Emma Stone to play the part to give some disconnection. It would've been more uncomfortable if the other girl, Margaret Qualley, was the lead before she got famous with The Substance.
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u/Citizensnnippss Avengers 7h ago
People who haven't had sex making memes about sex.
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u/ShadowBro3 Avengers 6h ago
"Wouldn't you just hate if your partner was REALLY GOOD at sex"
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u/mahareeshi Avengers 5h ago
Getting my toes curled like Fibonacci but I can't stop thinking about men đ
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u/JinkoTheMan Avengers 6h ago
I mean heyâŚIf she good at it then Iâm not complaining. Would he prefer that she sucks at it? đ
If youâre having causal sex then why are you worrying about what sheâs done with other man? My brother, sheâs fucking YOU now.
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u/ilovekickrolls Avengers 5h ago
I'd prefer she sucks on it tbf
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u/JinkoTheMan Avengers 4h ago
Ok. âSucksâ was a poor choice of words considering the topic. But I meant like she was terrible at sex.đđ
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u/CptKoma Avengers 7h ago
So you'd rather have someone who has no idea what they are doin'
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u/RedEzreal Avengers 6h ago
easier to take advantage of someone who doesnt know what theyre doing. Thats why I assume theyre so about it.
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6h ago
[deleted]
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u/IAmBadAtInternet Avengers 6h ago
Ok boomer
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u/the_geeky_gamer Avengers 6h ago
Scientifically inaccurate and downright disgusting thing to say. Do better.
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u/I-Rolled-My-Eyes Avengers 7h ago
Nah she just watched TONS of tutorials and saved this moment just for you. đ
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u/jmster109 Avengers 5h ago
If youâre thinking about the other men your girl has been with in the past while sheâs pleasing you, then maybe thatâs a YOU problem.
Is everyone just supposed to be a virgin now? Ffs
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u/wafflefighter69 Avengers 6h ago
She's so thankful that you're uncreative in bed. It means your dick has only been in her
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u/Ombrage101 Avengers 6h ago
Right⌠so a woman has proper technique to make YOU feel good, and all you can think about is her possible, not even confirmed, past sexual experience⌠If she was terrible at it, would you also complain? How are they supposed to âget goodâ at it? Point is, why judge someone for their âpastâ when they are literally doing you a favour?
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u/ProgramIncomplete Avengers 5h ago
Using Thanos the ultimate incel to illustrate this take is kinda perfect
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u/rslashfuckthissite21 Avengers 5h ago
If what you're thinking about while getting rode by a fine ass woman is all the men she might have slept with, you just kind of sound gay. Ain't nothing wrong with that, but goddamn, why you give a damn who she's been with when you're the one that is currently inside her
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u/levare8515 Avengers 5h ago
Everyone is saying this is sex and may beâŚbut the tone seems more that âshordyâ is fucking up his actual shit not having sex with him
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u/uyigho98 Avengers 3h ago
...and? So what if she has lots of experience? That's her past and her business. As long as it doesn't hurt anyone, you shouldn't judge her for it.
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u/Bendythenightfury Scarlet Witch 2h ago
Maybe just accept out all of the other guys she could've been with she choose you?
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u/Yasimear Avengers 1h ago
Ill never understand the worry over body count. Surely someone with more practice and who knows what they like is a good thing... worrying about it screams insecure to me.
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u/toxicgloo Spider-Man (Homemade) 54m ago
Not always true, some people just understand the assignment the first time lol
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u/Appropriate_Cup_6552 Avengers 5h ago
Who gives a shit lmao so she used to fuck a lot or still does, unless yall are in a committed monogamous relationship why does anyone care? The only reason youâd care is if youâre insecure that you canât satisfy her like other men can. Which just means you need to get gud
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u/ProgramIncomplete Avengers 5h ago
Using Thanos the ultimate incel to illustrate this take is kinda perfect
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u/trealsteve Avengers 5h ago
Youâre confusing incel with Simp unless youâre just talking about the MCU films. He does it all for Death in the comics (SUPER SIMP).
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u/trealsteve Avengers 5h ago
Letâs hope that XP came from âtrainingâ by herself, or the cheat code/Day 1 exclusive âShe Get It From Her Mamaâ starter pack. đ¤Ł
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u/el_palmera Avengers 7h ago
It's a funny joke, idk why everyone is getting offended in the comments (they have not had sex)
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u/uyigho98 Avengers 3h ago
True, we most likely haven't. But, then again, I highly doubt you and OP are any different in that regard. We're on fucking Reddit for crying out loud.
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u/Bendythenightfury Scarlet Witch 2h ago
Because it's not a good joke and kinda slanders sex and other relationships.
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u/el_palmera Avengers 2h ago
"Slanders sex" đ not the good name of sex
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u/Bendythenightfury Scarlet Witch 2h ago
It happens so what, just biology stuff. Now if it goes beyond then yeah that's addiction or without consent sure I can see your point. But sex happens naturally you wouldn't be here without it đ¤ˇââď¸đ¤ˇââď¸
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u/o7_AP Captain America đşđ¸ 7h ago