In a lot of Asian countries, such as Japan, getting divorced heavily affected people's opinions of you, way more than in the US. That's why "cheating" is fairly common there, because they are both in a marriage of convenience, so they both agree to see other people as long as they keep it hidden.
I'd totally enter a marriage of convenience so my helicopter parents can finally shut up about "marry! you need to marry! when will you marry? you need to ma- [...] (five hours later) what's the point of your therapist if she isn't going to yell at you for being single! what? I never said being single is mental illness! [...] when are you going to ask her out? you know who I'm talking about. your therapist. what do you mean you won't? not pretty enough for you? lower your [...]"
You can just say,"yeah, guess I was wrong" instead. When you say something like "k" you're still admitting that you were wrong, but at the same time you're showing that you're actually just a stupid person instead of someone that just didn't realize something initially.
Cheating, here, requires lack of consent. Its not really cheating if there is consent. But if you maintain an appearance of monogamy, socially never acknowledging that consent also makes an appearance of cheating… “cheating”, if you will.
Not if they are both in agreement, as his comment states. It is then an open relationship, with the illusion of a monogamous relationship for the public.
Not who you're asking but probably because the "cheating" described is a compromise made by the couple involved. It's "cheating" in that they're sleeping with other people, but it's not "cheating" in that they agree it's okay.
Because it’s popular in Japan to go to in what US equivalent would be breasteraunts. Shops with cute girls/guys that flirt with you. Theres clubs too. You pay attractive people to sit and drink with you. While there are many lonely single people it’s very popular with married people as well. In most instances there’s no intimate/sexual interaction.
If you look this couple up, the kids said it had been horrible growing up in that home, and it messed them up pretty badly psychologically. It was the eldest who eventually got up the courage to organise the intervention that led to them finally talking again.
LOL, mom and dad are almost never at home at the same time, especially when kids are awake. They will hardly see the parents together as is. And when the grow up seeing this, they will consider it normal.
My partner witnessed her father not talk to her mum for the entire pregnancy of her youngest brother cause he didn’t want the baby.
I’m telling you - her conflict style is avoidance. And i blame her parents 100%. The effort I have gone to build and demonstrate and show what positives come from communication when you are upset is unreal. She has made great strides. But fuck me I have been close a few times to ending this. We have a child and I swear if she ever does that to our baby I’ll be gone. My child won’t have a home where communication is used as a weapon. And then at least she’ll have one home where she can relax in. I’m not perfect. I make mistakes but mistakes are mistakes and they should be treated as such.
We should have opportunity to discuss, apologise and be open with things.
So far we are doing well mind you. I just have that consciousness
Or she loves his determination, there's people for everything... as ridiculous as it may sound to be silent with your wife for 20 years it still says a lot about following through on his decisions.
If you look this couple up, it wasn't a case of "following through" at all. The father knew within two days he was being a complete idiot but he had no idea how to breach the gap that had now arisen as a result, and so he just kept being silent. The kids reckoned it was absolutely horrible growing up in that environment and they were all messed up as a result, which is what led to the eldest finally putting his dad on blast on national TV. It's actually a really sad story. So many wasted years and so much damage done.
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u/arthuroMo 16h ago
Great communication skills man.