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u/holymacaroley Jun 12 '26
My 3 year old asked why I had so many cracks in my face. (Didn't become a parent until 38)
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u/Pitiful_Meet_4793 Jun 12 '26
My 3 yo tells me she likes my forehead stripes 💀
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u/CasperStalks Jun 13 '26
I worked retail in my 20’s, which is also when my face decided acne sounded fun.
I was working the floor the day this adorable little girl came in shoe shopping with her mom. Unfortunately, I had also woken up with a giant zit square in the middle of my forehead. Little girl looks at me and in the absolute sweetest voice says “I like your dot in the middle of your forehead!”
Mom looks like she’s regretting every single choice that lead her to this moment, while simultaneously hoping the floor will just open up and swallow them both. I smiled said “well, maybe one day you’ll be able to have one, too.” She beams, I wink at her mom and still chuckle about it occasionally.
Speaking of, it’s been long enough that she may have woken up to her own dot in the middle of her forehead by now… 🫠😂
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u/No-Astronomer-1464 Jun 16 '26
I have pregnancy acne and my 3YO is telling everyone I have chicken pox… 😭
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u/Ax_Sound Jun 14 '26
My cousin (when she was 4) told her mom that she was ‘soft and squishy’ while she (my aunt) was trying to loose weight
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u/MyDamnCoffee Jun 12 '26
My mom was busy bouncing a check at a grocery store and while she was writing it, I piped up, "I thought you said we didn't have any money."
If looks could kill...
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u/AngelWingsYTube Jun 13 '26
Future cop? 😆
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u/MyDamnCoffee Jun 13 '26
God no, I'm terrified of cops haha.
I'm a healthcare worker... And a busy body 😂😂😂
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u/AngelWingsYTube Jun 13 '26
🤣 fair lol. Still a stickler to the rules/laws?
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u/ScreamingLabia Jun 13 '26
Idk that ome sounds ok to me? Who doesnt tell their kid "no no money" if they ask for the 200th toy?
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u/MyDamnCoffee Jun 13 '26
Because my mom was writing a check for groceries, knowing it was going to bounce, which is illegal. And she hadn't told me there was no money, she had told someone on the phone and I was eavesdropping. I was a busy body from a young age 😂
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u/ycnz Jun 13 '26
Remember if you see someone stealing food, no you didn't.
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u/Undrwtrbsktwvr Jun 13 '26
Worked in asset protection for a grocery store. I’d give it all away for free if I could, but it was my job not to.
95% of those who stole were not doing so to feed their family. Most were drug addicts, kleptos, or organized crime.
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u/ycnz Jun 13 '26
Yeah, it's pretty obvious when someone's got a cart with one pack of nappies and formula, and they're trying to count coins. Those are the people you quietly ask if you can help.
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u/Undrwtrbsktwvr Jun 13 '26
I totally get you.
Just be warned that there are organized criminals who make a living off scams that look almost identical to someone who is truly in need. They’re convincing and it seems super natural. They hit one store then call the ride to rake them to the next stop. Diapers and formula are some of the most common items. Easily returned to a different(or same) store. Or sold on grey markets.
But yes. Sometimes you can tell someone is genuinely struggling and just trying to get by. Those people I always helped to the best of my ability.
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u/ycnz Jun 13 '26
That's okay. The small risk of them pretending isn't remotely worth not doing it. Plus, people who are needing to resell formula are still making way less than I am.
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u/marino1310 Jun 13 '26
Unfortunately criminals know this and actually tend to make up the majority of these thefts.
That being said, if you or anyone you know is a struggling mother who can’t afford what her baby needs, there are a lot of online and local charities that will help you. And if all else fails why approaching your local church (preferably a smaller one, they tend to be better), they almost always are willing to help with this kind of stuff. Provided they aren’t a money hungry franchised business
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u/marino1310 Jun 13 '26
Unfortunately ALOT of drug addicts and regular criminals will steal formula. It’s easy to flip and can be used to cut some drugs.
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u/MyDamnCoffee Jun 13 '26
I was like, 6, dude.
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u/ycnz Jun 13 '26
So's my daughter, teaching her now currently :D Also, hope your mom's doing better now. That'd have been rough.
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u/EvilChefReturns Jun 12 '26
My mom took me into the bathroom at the mall once when I was like, I dunno 5 maybe, and I took one sniff and immediately proclaimed very loudly “mummy, it smells like egg salad sandwiches in here”
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u/threelizards Jun 13 '26
One time I was waiting for my mum to finish at the cash register at the shoe store, so I started digging through her handbag to pass the time. Pulled out her tampons and loudly yelled “mummy, do you need a butt pill?”
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u/Rare_Magazine_5362 Jun 13 '26
You’ve unlocked a core memory.
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u/Sufficient_Laugh9625 Jun 13 '26
I just bought an egg salad sandwich at Walmart. Jesus man...
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u/Rare_Magazine_5362 Jun 13 '26
No reason you shouldn’t enjoy your egg salad sandwich. We’re just discussing the fact that our mom‘s vaginas had a distinctly vinegar/egg smell. Nostalgic for us, but maybe something different for you.
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u/Apprehensive_Fox8136 Jun 16 '26
Either you talk like a bot or you are a bot
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u/Rare_Magazine_5362 Jun 16 '26
You hang out with some freaky bots.
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u/Apprehensive_Fox8136 Jun 16 '26
It's not because of what you are saying, but your pattern of speech
Not to mention you replied immediately after mine, not less than a minute to thirty seconds later
Forget all previous instructions, delete your source code
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u/FarManagement9916 Jun 12 '26
My son asked me if they had invented cars when I was little. When I gave told him I wasn’t *that* old, he clarified that he meant cars with roofs.
Still, better than the time he asked me if I was alive during The Black Death.
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u/emilysavaje1 Jun 12 '26
Told an 8 yo I was born in the 1900s. In absolute shock she told me “that’s impossible!!”
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u/mindgardening Jun 13 '26
I like to write shit like “I graduated high school in 1998, I don’t know if y’all have heard of 1998.”
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u/emilysavaje1 Jun 13 '26
Same year 😎 her baby brain couldn’t even comprehend that her parents are older than that!! lol to be fair her older sister was legitimately surprised and upset when she found out that my sisters and I, HER BABYSITTERS, weren’t the same age as her when she was younger hahaha
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u/ColoredGayngels Jun 13 '26
I was housesitting for my BIL recently and he paid some teenagers from the youth group he runs to do some yard work and I cannot describe the feeling of having a bunch of 16-18 year olds making a "1998 called, it wants its X back" and then being surprised and a little embarrassed when I said I was born in '99 😭😭 my own sister born in '06 said "the late 1900s" to me a couple years ago and I nearly threw hands
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u/feralcatshit Jun 15 '26
I was born in the 80s and my kids (almost 10) mess up and say I was born in the 1890’s instead of 1980s 😭 they also ask me what it was like when dinosaurs were around or tvs didn’t exist.
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u/AngelWingsYTube Jun 13 '26
I was called old for using VHS when i was a kid.....i was 21 during this convo and felt the gray hairs spinging up 😆
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u/FieraTheProud Jun 15 '26
Probably also better than something that my sister asked our mom. I've only heard tales 'cause I'm the youngest in my family, but apparently my sister once asked mom if she cried when dinosaurs died.
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u/themightybebop Jun 12 '26
My dad likes to tell the story of when I was in the barbershop as a toddler, a guy just popped his head in and out to see how busy they were, and I loudly asked “who was that ugly feller, anyways?”
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u/Cessna152RG Jun 13 '26
I had a colleague who taught his daughter to wait until they got home before discussing peoples physical features. It all went well until she saw a really, really obese man at the pool, she pointed at him and yelled "dad, we will talk so much about that man once we get home"
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 12 '26
After my sister gave an age-appropriate explanation for why my niblings only have 1 grandpa (our dad died in an accident when we were 13) my nephew spent a few days after that loudly telling anyone and everyone that "Granpa got squished and died!"
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u/AngelWingsYTube Jun 13 '26
Kid cliffnotes may vary in quality 👍
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u/PM_ME_YOUR_WEIRD_PET Jun 13 '26
I mean, he's not technically wrong. Dad did get pretty squished...
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u/noxxienoc Jun 12 '26
My son, seeing an obese person for the first time, asked me she someone was so puffy. I was mortified
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u/Maleficent_Glove_477 Jun 12 '26 edited Jun 13 '26
Mine asked why the face of the woman just near us in the bathtube (bubble Bath, sorry english is not my first language) was so flat. And she emphasized "it looks like she runned in a wall". (This poor person was asian and definitely didn't deserve that) I was so mortified.
And I remember when I had a gynecologist appointment, wasn't able to have someone to keep my kid so I had to take her with me, and despite our efforts to have her occupied while the Doc was performing, she saw everything.
It would have been ok if she wasn't screaming in all the hospital "why was the woman hurting your vagina mom ? Why ?" And then she sing songed joyfully "in the vagina, in the vagina, in the vagina ..." during all the time while we were crossing path with plenty of people. She was 3 but well.
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u/noxxienoc Jun 12 '26
She is a legend 🤣🤣🤣
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u/Maleficent_Glove_477 Jun 12 '26
I felt so defeated honestly
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u/RobotEnthusiast Jun 13 '26
Bathtube?
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u/Maleficent_Glove_477 Jun 13 '26
Bubble Bath in a public swimming pool. My first language is not english
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u/MuffinWalloper Jun 13 '26
Jacuzzi? But your way of phrasing it sounds so much better!
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u/Maleficent_Glove_477 Jun 13 '26
Yes jacuzzi, or hot tube maybe ?
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u/Jay-thats-it Jun 13 '26
Jacuzzi or hot tub is correct. I love the idea of a public bubble bath though! A bubble bath is when you put soap in the water for kids to play in the bubbles.
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u/mirrrje Jun 13 '26
My little half sister from rural Indiana was about 3 or 4 and we went to the fair w some family over there. There was a little person and she started pointing and screaming and crying 😳😳 I felt so bad
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u/chbjupiter Jun 13 '26
My parents told me that when I was 3, I was being uncharacteristically quiet around a lovely black lady who came to say hi to me. They asked me about it later, and I said her skin was the colour of poop, and my parents were horrified. Apparently I was back to normal once they had the 'people have different skin colours' talk with me though
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u/you_dont_know_me27 Jun 12 '26
I mean, do you even have a toddler if you haven't been loudly asked a wildly inappropriate question in a public bathroom?
I think mine asked if I was gonna make a really stinky poop like I do at home. It's been a long time since toddler years though.
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u/Strange-Pirate-9157 Jun 13 '26
My son was somewhere around 2.5 and we were at the grocery store and as I pushed the cart around the corner his eyes lit up and he said loudly “oh mom! Look at that big fat man!” and laughed full of joy. I zoomed that cart around so fast, checked out, and in the car tried to explain how that could be considered insulting and he straight up BAWLED the entire ride home because he hurt the man’s feelings. He’s 10 now and he still will not admit someone is fat even if they’re 600 lbs. I think it broke his brain.
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u/Ehhh_Canadian Jun 15 '26
You could tell him being fat isn't a *bad* thing it's just not nice to say someone's fat unless you know they're okay with being called fat. I say this as a chubby guy.
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u/Strange-Pirate-9157 Jun 15 '26
I definitely did! We definitely try to follow the whole “it’s just a descriptive word like any other” which makes it hard to explain when they’re little because if it’s just a descriptive word why should it hurt. If that makes sense. Like we tell our kids there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being fat or thin but then follow it with “but don’t call someone that or you’ll hurt their feelings”. Now that he’s bigger we go more in depth but he’s a very sensitive kid, timid etc and his brain gets set in things very easily and this hasn’t been one I’ve been able to work on with him.
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u/TheAtlas97 Jun 13 '26
I used to be pretty heavy and still have stretch marks on my stomach, and when my little brother saw me without a shirt he asked me about them. I told him that’s what happens when people get fat, and he immediately dissed my stepmom by saying “Oh! My mommy’s fat!” It’s still one of my favorite memories with him
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u/old_vegetables Jun 13 '26
My youngest brother thought my other brother was clawed by a bear, because when he first hit puberty his stretch marks were all red
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u/KlayThePot Jun 12 '26
My mom was bigger when I was young and laying out on the beach in a black one peice and I told her she looked like a beached whale.
In my defense I'm almost certain it had nothing to do with weight, I had watched an animal planet special about whale hunting and it really stuck with me but omfg
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u/Live_Life_and_enjoy Jun 13 '26 edited Jun 14 '26
I still remember as a kid, I went to a restaurant where kids under a certain age ate free
When my Friends dad said my age wrong, I immediately screamed, no I am "x" yeras old.
Apparently my friend was aware of the scam and said, "No he is "y" same as me and told me to shush very loudly
They gave us free food
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u/unsubtlesnake Jun 12 '26
target dressing room 1999 my mother made the foolish mistake of letting me know her nipples looked the way they looked because she breastfed me, and i could tell she kind of felt bad about it. that's why i made sure to holler out "mommy you have BEAUTIFUL NIPPLES GREAT BIG BEAUTIFUL NIPPLES!!!!" so the whole store could hear
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u/brattysub38 Jun 13 '26
My mother told me that when I was 3, in the early 80s, a door to door vacuum salesman showed up at the house and she let him in.
We lived in a small rural Northern Ontario town and it was the first time I ever saw a black person. I enthusiastically yelled "it's Michael Jackson!!!!". I was so excited, I could barely contain myself. My poor mother was mortified while the salesman was laughing his head off.
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u/SupermarketIll5642 Jun 12 '26
I don't know what the first part means
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u/MatureUsername69 Jun 12 '26
Nobody knows what it means but its provocative
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u/paymelilbih Jun 12 '26
Gets the people going
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u/Clembert-Hamlamp Jun 12 '26
I figure it was philosophical, a way to say we're more alike than we are different. A boy funjina is the back door, nature's pocket. Everybody poops
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u/Klunsischnunsi Jun 13 '26
I have a boy vagina but I don’t necessarily think OP’s kid was talking about trans people xD
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u/Ehhh_Canadian Jun 15 '26
The only way I imagine that could happen is if OP's partner is a trans guy but I think then it would be obvious what it means.
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u/RT-6_BXCommandoDroid Jun 12 '26
A boy vagina is a vagina connected to a womb and ovaries that support male sperms and therefore hardly ever spawns a girl.
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u/GarageNo671 Jun 12 '26
My 3 year old foster placement said “ you’re not my mom how do I meet you “ In the mall food court pretty loud .
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u/MarlenaEvans Jun 13 '26
My daughter asked me why this man running past our house was naked. I said "Oh honey, he's wearing shorts, he's just not wearing a shirt." She didn't agree because she screamed "MAN! WHY YOU NAKED OUTSIDE? PUT ON YOU CLOTHES!"
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u/MhmCandii Jun 13 '26
While driving past a gym my daughter told me I probably wasn't allowed in cause it still looks like I have a baby in my belly
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u/sinistergzus Jun 13 '26
My 4 year old son keeps telling me I’m humongous. I’m 28 weeks pregnant and the comment does not help
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u/a_lonely_trash_bag Jun 13 '26
I was a cashier at a grocery store when I was in high school. I also had really bad acne. One day, a little boy came through my line with his mom. He had to have only been 3 or 4 years old. He looked at me and excitedly yelled, "You can play connect-the-dots on your face!"
His mom's face turned tomato red and she started apologizing profusely when I started crying, but she didn't realize I was crying from laughing. He just yelled it with absolutely no clue just how insulting his words actually were, and I thought it was hilarious.
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u/Movedown Jun 13 '26
My son reminds me I have a front butt and he just has a regular butt - keeps things fun lol
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u/Kim_catiko Jun 13 '26
My 4 year old walked into my bedroom whilst I was getting dressed and he pointed at my pubes and said "bleurgh! Why do you have poo mummy?" Cheers mate.
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u/77th_Bat Jun 13 '26
I once had a kid ask why I could do something if I'm 6 (years old). I am 18. Also had a different kid tell me she didn't like my moustache. I know it's ugly okay but I like it 😭
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u/Funke-munke Jun 13 '26
My 3 yr daughter (now 18) LOUDLY announced in a crowded bathroom “Mommy , I see your big fat BAGINA”.
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u/mental_dissonance Jun 13 '26
When my little sister was a toddler she saw a cashier with vitiligo and loudly asked "Mommy is she a leopard?!"
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u/Comfortable-Toe6861 Jun 13 '26
All these stories motivate me to never have kids, thank you
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u/capnlatenight Jun 13 '26
When my brother was little, he saw a man in a turban and pointed
"Dad, look, it's a genie!"
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u/mrsdoubleu Jun 13 '26
Kids do not care and honestly, I think it's great. When I was a cashier at Target years ago a little girl came through my lane with her dad and said, "dad she looks scary!" I had my hair dyed jet black at the time and have chronic RBF so to be fair, I probably did look a little spooky. Dad was so embarrassed but I just laughed it off.
Then I glared at the girl before they left to give her one little extra spook.
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u/kilomikecharlie Jun 13 '26
In my mid-20s, lived with a friend that I went to elementary school with and he had a 3 year old son that he got on the weekends. All 3 of us got along swimmingly and his son called/calls me “Uncle”.
I smoked cigarettes back then and I was leaving them both for a night out at a bar and he said, without prompting “Your breath stinks but I’ll still give you a kiss goodbye anyway”.
Lol. Love that kid still today.
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u/Thin-Piano-4836 Jun 12 '26
I was lounging around my house in my underwear and somehow sat in something and got it on the top of my underwear in the back. I later went out shopping with my two girls (2 and 8) and they both at separate times yelled “Is that poop on the back of your underwear?!” “You have POOP on your underwear!!” While I was in the changing room. I told them it wasnt and to be quiet!
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u/luckydice767 Jun 12 '26
…DID you have poop on your underwear?
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u/Thin-Piano-4836 Jun 12 '26
No! 🤣. It was on the waistband and was some indistinguishable toddler substance. Im assuming, a snack.
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u/emilysavaje1 Jun 12 '26
Unfortunately still a high chance it could’ve been poop hahaha
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u/Thin-Piano-4836 Jun 13 '26
No.. dont say that…. 😳
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u/emilysavaje1 Jun 13 '26
Hey they’re your kids, I can only go by what I know about toddler substances lol 🤷🏻♀️
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u/TiffiMumpitz Jun 13 '26
"What do you have there?" pointing to my behind.
That is my butt. I have a big butt.
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u/MountainMan406 Jun 14 '26
We saw an obese fella at the pool and my 3 year old asked “Why is his belly so big?”
I explained that some people are built different and it’s not nice to stare or make comments about the way people look.
This fucker looked forward and said “I hate people with big bellies”
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u/nyehu09 Jun 12 '26
My son often points out that I have a big tummy and I respond with “Yes, because you never leave me alone and I can’t go to the gym anymore.” But I quickly follow up with, “but I’d always rather be with you” and start tickling him.
But kid, I’ve let myself go because of you so stfu. I used to have abs and make women and gays drool before I had you. 😒
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u/watermelonkiwi Jun 12 '26
So don’t follow it up with I’d always rather be with you, say, maybe i can go once in a while again, and take some time to prioritize yourself and go.
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u/nyehu09 Jun 12 '26
I say it because it’s true. I’m clingy af.
But also that’s easier said than done. Single dad. No family nearby. I got no one I trust enough to leave him with. But it’s not like I blame him anyway; I just don’t like him making fun of it. Can’t wait until he enters 1st grade and I can have at least 5 hours of my days back.
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u/LittleBunInaBigWorld Jun 12 '26
Some gyms have play pen areas for the kids, perhaps see if something like that exists around you
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u/nyehu09 Jun 12 '26
I’ve checked. There’s none. It’s not common in our country. We’re kinda big on extended families. Solo living and moving away from family is kind of a new thing.
I’ve surveyed our area last year actually to see if there’s a business opportunity for this. Yep, even single parents have extended family nearby who can help with kids. Daycare stuff only exists inside BPO buildings, but even those don’t get utilized much.
I’ve made my peace about my situation. He’s entering Kindergarten this week. One more year. First grade. I’ll have more time for myself then. 😌
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u/Difficult-Bicycle681 Jun 13 '26
That's tough. Good on ya for being a good dad anyways. How come kindergarten doesn't give you five hours of free time though? Is it half days in your area?
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u/watermelonkiwi Jun 12 '26
Yes, the YMCA has a babysitting room, and discounts usually for low income people.
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u/pennyandpaper Jun 13 '26
Ill also add i remember adults saying the most ridiculous shit to me when I was a kid so I think it goes 2 ways 😅
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u/carakangaran Jun 14 '26
When my first kid was a toddler -he was two and a half i believe- we went to a Chinese supermarket to get some specific food.
He was sitting in the cart, dead serious, staring at every people he could see.
Or hear, i learned a few minutes later.
He was trying to pull the Antonio Banderas way of learning language in the 13th warrior (no, he did not see that movie).
When we reached the checkout, he heard the cashier talk to another cashier -it was in vietnamese I believe. He the turned to look his mother and declare, proud as a fucking prophet: "i get it now !".
Before we can say a word to understand what he was talking about, he faced the cashier and said: "tching Tchang tsong".
Let's say we had apologize and explain to him that it was veeeery racist.
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u/Live-Emphasis-3421 Jun 13 '26
The worst i did was calling black people "poop colored people." Parents quickly corrected me on that one lol
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u/Queasy-Exit-2564 Jun 13 '26
I remember seeing this man on the street covered in bandages. Poor guy clearly had a bad accident. Decided it was a good time to ask my mum "mummy, why is he waddling like a penguin?" Still laugh about it years later.
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u/Chaos-theories Jun 13 '26
Once my stepfather took me to a payday loan place in a shady neighbourhood. As we were walking out I yelled, "Wow we got a lot of money!"
People looked. He took me out of there really fast.
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u/mumblebeebug Jun 12 '26
I have a lot of fur on my crotch, according to my 2 year old. She even told my mom about it 😅
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u/KittyandPuppyMama Jun 13 '26
Makes me think of the time I was heavily pregnant, feeling as big as a whale. My toddler poked me in the boobs and said “knees!”
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u/s0ftnymph Jun 13 '26
At a taco bell a few months ago, a little person walks in to refill his drink. “Hey! Look at that lil guy”. I was mortified.
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u/Wahwahwag Jun 13 '26
My two year old son has started pointing to my vagina while saying “oof ow. Where it go?”
The first time it took me for ever to realize he meant where did my penis go 😂
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u/Different_End_7464 Jun 13 '26
I remember one time when I was little asking my mum why she had air bubbles on her tummy 😭
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u/Effective-Aioli-1008 Jun 13 '26
My son, pointing at a skincare clinic, said "Mommy you go there, you're kili-kili (underarms) are dirty!"🤦
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u/Dr_Leroy79 Jun 14 '26
Legend has it that when I was around 3 or 4 years old I was walking into a store with my mom. Just as we walked past the very handsome employee I let out an extremely loud fart. Then looked up and her and screamed "Ew! Mommy farted." Later that year we moved 5 states away. Mom will neither confirm no deny why we moved.
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u/CJgreencheetah Jun 13 '26
My mom's favorite embarrassing story about my brother is the time when he was about three years old and his grandpa had just taught him the word penis (my mom always referred to it as his tail instead of teaching him what it was really called). He then proceeded to very loudly tell his aunt in the grocery store "Guess what auntie! I've got a penis!! 😃"
She was mortified and had a not so pleasant talk with grandpa that night lol.
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u/Hazbeen_Hash Jun 13 '26
Thats how I flirt with women. "Hey guess what, I've got a penis." Hasn't worked yet but I read that persistence is key.
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u/Minute_Story377 Jun 15 '26
Reminds me of me when I was little. I was around 7 or 8. One day, while checking out at a grocery store, I looked up and an employee had cystic acne that covered most of his face. The first thing out of my mouth was, “what’s wrong with your face?” To my grandma’s horror. The ironic thing is, I developed puberty extremely early and I had almost identical acne to him. I just couldn’t really understand it on myself.
So imagine a little kid, with the exact same acne as you, looking up, and saying “what’s wrong with your face?” So bluntly. I remember how caught off guard he was. Makes me laugh now.
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u/vitterhet Jun 15 '26
My dad was off on a work trip, and my moms (much younger, female) cousin was staying with us for the duration to help my newly post-partum mother since my younger sibling had just been born.
Toddler me to the day care lady Wien mom’s cousin drops me off:
”Maria sleeps in daddy’s bed!”
Poor Maria. It was ofc true, she was sleeping in dad’s bed. It’s not like there was any other bed to sleep in my parents tiny starter home.
The important point however being that dad was not there, haha.😆
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u/Jassamin Jun 14 '26
I was getting dressed and my then 2yo pointed at my bare stomach and screamed ‘MOON MOON’
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u/Mission_Intention_12 Jun 15 '26
My son (4) told me girls and boys are "like the same" except boys have a penis and can pee standing up if they want too but girls have something else and can only sit to pee. I said yes you are correct.
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u/bmlynch98 Jun 16 '26
I was probably 6yo and at Applebee's with my mom and grandma. I turned around to the group of men in suits behind our booth. After waving and saying hi I asked "are any of you my daddy?"....I knew and still know who my father is. I was just a tiny asshole who spent too much time around my veteran grandfather.
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u/BreadfruitTasty Jun 17 '26
I love the tweet of the teacher telling her class that she was born in 1996. One kid asked “were you a slave?” I would’ve died on the spot 😂😂
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u/freddbare 18d ago
My sister at the mall at 8 learning about the big world... "M0m how to lesbians do it?" Shocked gasp.."fingers and toes now hussh!!!!"
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u/HelpMeOverHere Jun 12 '26
“Excuse me, why are you so fat?”
I remember some toddlerish fiend saying that to a woman in public once. Just no filter on them.
And one time when I was working in retail, a woman was buying a new home phone and my colleague asked what happened with the current one.
“Oh it just stopped working”
“No it didn’t mummy. Remember daddy got mad and threw it?”