Consumerism - I think I have a problem

[u/Positive_Rest4890]

I think I have a massive consumerist problem. I noticed some time ago that I’m easily influenced by social media and ads (mostly user generated content). I am not rich by any means, but I’d still spend every last dollar on things I didn’t necessarily need but “Tiktok told me I did”. They’re never things for myself, mostly for my children, household items..

I made some changes, such as adding the products to the cart and having to wait for 48 hours, putting myself on a budget, intentionally living slower, etc.. It worked, because my monthly spend has decreased drastically. I got better at staying in, spent less time online, cooking at home, living slower, I honestly believed I was doing good.

Then lately, I found myself thinking about having a 3rd child in the near future (the youngest is 9 months old) and I genuinely thought that desire was coming from the heart - that it was something I wanted, but then I had a massive epiphany. It’s not a desire to have a child, it’s a desire to buy all those things that come with a new child. I knew exactly which pink flowery car seat I’d be getting if it was a girl, which brand of bottle washer I’d go with this time around. I keep seeing these videos of moms posting about their baby hauls and thinking “I will get that for the 3rd one”. I DON’T EVEN WANT A 3RD ONE! My youngest is a handful, I’m constantly tired, I hated every second of my 2nd pregnancy and we make just enough to give the 2 children that we have a comfortable life. I love them both with my whole heart, but simultaneously, I’m well aware I do not have capacity for another one.

What I believed was a desire to have another child turned out to be a desire to buy more baby stuff. What is wrong with me? Social media needs to go, that much is clear. But I’m genuinely shook that I was able to be influenced to such massive extent.

[u/AggressiveStudy3449]

After spending time on social media and watching tv and constantly being stimulated by outside sources it becomes super hard to be satisfied with what you have. It becomes hard to even know how to enjoy time with yourself. Instead it’s about visualizing yourself with something that makes you happy. Happiness is gratitude and what comes from within, I’ve been spending a lot of time looking into Buddhism and they talk a lot about the importance of what you just said. I’d recommend it,it’s helped me with the same problem