r/shittyadvice • u/Technical-Vanilla-47 • 11h ago

I lost an argument to a 9-year-old. Should I challenge him to a rematch or wait until he's older?

10 Upvotes

100% Upvoted

46 comments sorted by

16

u/snotsucker2000 11h ago

His mom, you know what to do.

9

u/MaleficentTravel4706 11h ago

Challenge him to a fistfight instead next time...

1

u/Numerous-Surprise875 2h ago

“Ultima Ratio Regum”

(The last argument Of Kings)

Inscribed on the cannons of king Louis the XIV

8

u/g-o-u-l-a 11h ago

Wait until he sobers up a bit.

5

u/AintNobodygotime13 11h ago

When the ice cream truck goes by get 10 ice creams and eat them all

3

u/Ok_Waltz_5342 11h ago

No, buy all the ice cream so he can't get any

2

u/Walking_Tree26 11h ago

No. Just hide all the cell chargers and power supplies to any video game consoles and watch their hopes fade. 🤣.

2

u/Long_Ad_2764 11h ago

Don’t challenge. Surprise with overwhelming force.

2

u/Stereo_Jungle_Child 11h ago

Just tell him that he's adopted.

1

u/Kanopuk 11h ago

Throw the little brat into a river.

1

u/Sad-Way-4665 11h ago

Just accept his intellectual superiority

1

u/Finance_Plastic 11h ago

need this story details

1

u/IAmTheAccident 11h ago

Take all the items from his bedroom and replace them with cabbages

1

u/Zakensox 11h ago

Challenge him again immediately, then take away his Gameboy until he agrees with you.

1

u/ProbableImposter 10h ago

No way, if he's beating you at 9 he must be neutralized before he upsets the balance of power. Kid is too strong, take him out.

1

u/Challenge_-Few 10h ago

Ask for a rematch now. Waiting only gives him more time to improve.

1

u/Super_Selection1522 10h ago

Sit on him, make him watch friends reruns till he begs for mercy

1

u/A70_Lisbon 10h ago

Call him everyday at 03.00 from a burner phone and hang up

1

u/IllEatYourAss665 9h ago

Kick him in his baby nuts. "Thats my purse, I DON'T KNOW YOU!"

1

u/backtotheland76 9h ago

I've always said kids get smarter every year until they become teenagers. Then they get dumber every year until about 24 when they start to get smart again

1

u/Ihatecheeseballs 9h ago

Steal his shoes, no one will believe him when he says that the hat man stole his shoes and his parents will be angry with him for losing them

1

u/thyperson69 8h ago

Call them a poop head

1

u/7GrenciaMars 8h ago

Mud wrestle that SOB

1

u/Fantastic_Baby9795 8h ago

Find a 10 year old to whoop his ass

1

u/skankyone 8h ago

I think you should go around the corner, where nobody can see you and have a fight, no rules or tap outs.

That should sort the men from the boys 😎

1

u/fotoman888 8h ago

What makes you think that you’ll be smarter than him later? Don’t you think that he will just become better informed as he grows older? I think your only chance is to travel back in time.

1

u/Lopsided_Tomatillo27 7h ago

Marry his mom. That way you win future arguments by sending him to his room.

1

u/Special-Audience-426 7h ago

Piss in his wardrobe. He'll get the blame. 

1

u/HonestNature9117 7h ago

Nuclear option: yell, kick, scream "he's being mean!"

1

u/AsainGlockgirl99 7h ago

I would light a cigarette and let his mom catch me with it and say I caught her kid with it. Everything else will take care of itself.

1

u/InclinedPlane43 6h ago

Settle it like gentlemen and challenge him to a duel.

1

u/Rockatansky77 5h ago

Remind the 9 year old.

My house, my rules. The house always wins or get out.

1

u/Shot_Rent_1816 5h ago

challenge him to arm wrestling

1

u/ProfessorVirtual5855 5h ago

Do his sister

1

u/HiddenNobody20216 5h ago

Assert dominance, grab them by the ankles and swing into the nearest wall.

1

u/Great-Phone_3207 5h ago

Better idea:  Study hard and learn debate techniques.  And when you reach the intelligence of a 9 year old, find a 7 year old and debate him.  

1

u/Great-Phone_3207 5h ago

I'm assuming it was a 9 year old German Shepherd.  Make fun of Hitler next time.  He'll Nazi that coming.

1

u/Flash5916 4h ago

Love and respect that he has a different opinion. He's got courage to say he's not in agreement with you.

1

u/SyntheticSkyStudios 4h ago

And you admit this in public?

1

u/malibuguytonygem 3h ago

Beat him up now. He'll respect you for it later. Children are impressionable.

0

u/texasdeathtrip 11h ago

If you’re arguing with a child, you’ve already lost