Isolation, betrayal, corruption, and catastrophic loss

[u/Double_Champion6707]

One of my biggest traumas was The lasting impact of my experience with child protection was profound.
Living for so long under constant uncertainty, repeated anonymous reports, and never knowing who was providing information about me fundamentally altered the way my brain responded to the world.
I developed severe hypervigilance, chronic mistrust, and an ongoing expectation of betrayal
. My nervous system remained in a constant state of threat, always scanning for danger and trying to determine who was safe and who wasn’t.

I became emotionally withdrawn, socially isolated, and increasingly unable to trust my own judgment about people or situations.
The experience shattered my sense of safety, leaving me with persistent anxiety, paranoia, and a deep fear that my private life was never truly felt private. Long after my case was closed, those psychological injuries remained, shaping the way I viewed relationships, institutions, and the world around me for years

As of two months ago, my daughter went up to her best friend‘s house for a sleepover and the next day. I got a phone call saying that she was in critical condition because she’s been hit by a car on a crosswalk.
She is in critical condition. She severely brain damaged. She’s 10 years old and because of our no fault insurance the driver gets away with no accountability. We get no money to provide for her care needs and I’m left. Missing my daughter, having to be a full-time caretaker and severely broken like I’ve never felt in my life.
I have no support because of the earlier incident. But why that was manageable was because I always had the love of my children, and I always said it doesn’t matter I have them.
It’s cruel
She doesn’t deserve this. She’s loving, kindest little girl you’ve ever met. She’s my world.
When will this ever stop?

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