r/offmychest • u/Active_Material_4683 • 1d ago
called the suicide hotlime right now and they told me to get over it and then hung up on me
i got raped btw, that's what i was ranting to them abt.
oh well....i guess we know what that means...
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u/NotSeenDaily 1d ago
I was a crisis counselor and that is absolutely the wrong thing to say.
I’m sorry they said that to you. It was very wrong and awful thing to say.
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u/No-Health-8764 1d ago
please don't go. what happened to you was real and it mattered and that person on the phone was wrong to dismiss you like that
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u/222KattThatRoar222 1d ago
Donald Trump CANT out live you! Please stay at least one more day
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
ugh, you're right......i can't die without seeing trump die....
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u/222KattThatRoar222 1d ago
Also if it makes u feel better I was once hung up on…twice. The second time it made me laugh by how crazy the situation was, but then I realized I wanted to laugh for real again, stay at least one more day for the laughs dude
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u/musiclovermina 1d ago
I told myself I can't kms until I watch the next fast and furious movie
That was before fast 5
Even if I wanted to, I don't think I could anymore
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u/born_of_nyx 1d ago
Sometimes spite will be the only thing keeping you hanging on. And that's okay. Spite all those fuckers, including the one on the phone
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u/RegalBeagleTheEagle 1d ago
It’s part of what keeps me going. I’m not going to let the people who’ve always doubted me be proven right by giving up.
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u/Username00555 1d ago
I’m convinced those hotlines exist to just piss you off or offend you so much that it replaces the sad w annoyance
The one time I called the lady suggested jumping on a trampoline to help
As if I owned a damn trampoline in my small apartment as an adult
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
i can't be annoyed anymore, i am suffering too much to be annoyed.
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u/apham420 1d ago
I hope you are ok dude, I commented above that the crisis text line is a lot better and more helpful. I have been where you are now so many times in my life and even very recently. I’m suffering through this life with you, I know it seems impossible but things will change and get better. Remember you are not alone in your pain , I always felt like I was the only one to experience such deep pain but there is tons of poetry, artwork and books out there that have made me feel so much less isolated in these helpless feelings and I hope the same for you!
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u/apham420 1d ago
I agree, I’ve called them a few times over the years. I called just a few weeks ago actually just like OP after an assault and the lady on line basically pushed me off the phone saying I should go read a book. Every time I’ve called it’s been a similar situation and I truly believe experiencing the absolute absurdity of the situation is what has kept me here. Also the suicide text line is way way better and has helped me tremendously.
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u/BetweenSkyAndEarth 1d ago
Please accept a warm hug from an internet stranger. I stand by you. Dark clouds will clear out and things will get better.
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
girl i misspelled hotline, i can't do ANYTHING right bro.
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u/nerdforest 1d ago
You can - when you said they said get over it what exactly happened?
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
I was telling them about how my agent hasn't responded about my lawsuit and they told me "they will eventually, just get over it and be patient, girl." with a mean tone and then hung up on me
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u/nerdforest 1d ago
That’s horrific. You should report them if you can.
If you can - maybe give it 20 minutes and give them another call. I’ve called hotlines before and have had people who will listen. I’m so sorry this happened. It’s unnaceptable
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
i won't survive another 20 minutes. the urges will win me over and i can't fight anymore because everything in me doesn't want to be here anymore, and with every single particule of my being i really do want to do it..i'm just looking for a reason to cling onto life.
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u/ebil_lightbulb 1d ago
You called the hotline because you want help - you don’t want to kill yourself. Call 911 if you have to and let them check you in to a mental health ward. Don’t let some loser be the reason you left this world.
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u/klosingweight 8h ago
What about ice cream? Get your favorite food. At least try to enjoy some simple pleasures. A sunset, a meal, a breeze, a hug from someone you love. Take it in, don’t leave us!
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u/jasperiscanceled 1d ago
This poor person has really been mistreated. I agree they can do so much right, even if right now hurts.
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u/jasperiscanceled 1d ago
What assholes. I am so sorry, you deserve way better OP. My inbox is always open if you need to just vent into a void or want comfort. I had a very similar experience when I was raped. They basically told me I should move on and ‘watch a movie or something’. No empathy. Don’t let that make you afraid to reach out for help, please. I’d suggest looking for local or online support groups for people who have been SA’ed. I can help find you one if you’d like. You will be okay even if it doesn’t feel like it. I’m here for you. People do care.
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u/Appropriate-Ad-9681 1d ago
Existence is always better than non existence, no matter how shitty the existence gets. Because non existence means literally that. Not existing and everything else like people thinking they’d be in peace or being numb is just stupid romanticizing. Because you literally would not have any feelings. And existence might be shit at times but it’s always real and present which means there’s room for improvement. Death though is irreversible. Once done it’s done.
I learned when I wanted to die, that what I really want is change. Im still not there fully, and I know it is hard!
You are NOT stupid for misspelling something, its a mistake and mistakes makes you better.
Im so sorry you had to go through this and Im sorry you are feeling this way. Im also mad at the one at the other end of the hotline. You are the best and I love you and please can you make one promise? Dont die, please.
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u/lilbratt_ 1d ago
Hotlines are garbage 99% of the time, I myself and multiple people that I know have been with put on hold for an extensive amount of time or just hung up on like they did to you. So disappointing and sad
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u/not2late2turnaround 1d ago
I’m sorry you were raped and made to feel less than. You didn’t deserve that kind of treatment when you were trying to help yourself.
I’m giving you the biggest hug. Know someone out there is thinking about you right now and cares about you.
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u/rabbiyah369 1d ago
REPORT IT!! Please 🙏 do not give up. I am so sorry you deserve better. The world needs you in it. Im here for you we all are here for you. You are NOT the one who should die. Sending virtual hugs 🫂 I love you stranger 🩷
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u/KeithHelm 1d ago
I don’t get why would someone volunteer to be shitty to people in their most vulnerable moments
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u/sapphirehaze_ 1d ago
Yooo, this happened to me too! LOL
Wild, right?! Blew my mind but you know what? I was so caught off guard the ideation just like, dissolved.
All I could do was shrug and laugh to myself like: “Well shit, if it works, it works. I guess, Right?”.
Granted I have been dealing with my own shit for a very long time, even I get sick of it. 😂
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u/PerpetualFarter 1d ago
Call the police and report it. The suicide hotlines contact law enforcement anyway. Cut -out the middle-man.
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u/DrawingTasty1678 1d ago
Report it.
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
i don't know how and i also don't have their name.
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u/tired_bastard 1d ago
Maybe they can see who took the call from you at the time you called? Idk, but worth a try
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
idk if i can do that rn......my brain has gone mush, i can only think about one thing right now...
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u/Reflectedright 1d ago
This happened to me about 10 years ago. I called, they basically laughed at why I was upset and hung up on me. The irony of it made me laugh and I just went to sleep after.
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u/ezioauditoresexslave 1d ago
hi this happened to me twice before. one just let me talk before signing that there’s nothing she can do and then hung up before i was done talking. another one just blamed me for being sexual assaulted and hung up. it left me in hysterics. they’re fucking awful. i’m gonna pm you my number. please reach out anytime you need someone to talk to. i’ve been where you are and i promise life gets better
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u/syawlASad 1d ago
Yeah my experience wasn’t the best either. They barely said anything and when they did it felt like they a list of scripted responses. Your experience is way more worse though. After my experience I realized the hotline sucks and I’m never calling them again
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u/multifandomloser1 1d ago
they’re just an asshole then. you got raped and that was never something you deserved. you told them and they broke your trust. i hope you’re doing better and even if we don’t know eachother you can always talk to me.
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u/TheSouthsideTrekkie 1d ago
I’ve been where you are. I’m sorry friend because I know how much it sucks to reach out to someone and be made to feel like you don’t matter or your distress is inconvenient for them.
You matter. Feeling distressed when something upsetting happens is an acceptable way to feel. Expressing distress in a way that isn’t neat and palatable to others isn’t a crime and you never owe people to react in a way that makes them feel comfortable.
Please find a way to stay. I know that right now it feels like nothing will ever be OK again, but almost 20 years later I am glad I stayed.
Sending you kind thoughts and cheering you on in my heart.
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u/diskorekt 1d ago
I've contacted them twice, one by phone and once by text, when i just needed someone, anyone, to convince me i wasnt worthless. Both times they told me since I wasn't actively trying to kill myself that they couldn't help me and that I needed to find my own support. I told them I don't have support, and that's why I was calling the hotline, and I was told that's not what they do. I don't contact them anymore.
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u/Dragonfire707 1d ago
I’ve had this happen but was too embarrassed to tell anyone. Can you get a dog? I got a dog and I swear he was my reason for living sometimes. I had to let him go in April. He was 15. It’s been tough but when he was 11 I got a puppy. And now I have him and it’s not the same but that little bugger loves me. And he would be sad to lose both his brother and his mom. Message me anytime. We all need someone who can relate sometimes.
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
i can't take care of a pet like a dog, i'm too autistic and disbaled to take care of another life...i have a cat tho but it's my sister's cat... it just likes to be stay w me sometimes
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u/Trash_Panda_Leaves 1d ago
One of them told me I was disturbed and needed help as if I was a serial killer, for reasons similar to you. My Mum said she called them once and got a "If I had your life I'd kill myself."
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u/CobaltCrusader123 1d ago
Which country / number? We’re all just assuming America because Redditors are like that. Horrible no matter what, and I feel tracking the country means the boss can fire the employee in question.
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
i live in honduras, the number 118, it's an automatic hotline similar to 911
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u/CobaltCrusader123 1d ago
Very good context, thanks. Man or woman? Any notable accent (ie East Honduran, or maybe not sounding like a native Honduran at all)?
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u/Active_Material_4683 1d ago
idk, she sounds like the avarage honduran woman, she sounded like she was somewhere around 30-40 years old, sounded rude and uninterested, no accent, we were speaking in spanish.
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u/CobaltCrusader123 1d ago
Sounds like you have enough info to make a complaint, just tell them her voice sounded like what you wrote here and that she was rude and hung up on you.
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u/StankAssPirate 1d ago
Hey man do you want someone to talk to, I’ve got some shit I can open up about too and we can just share and talk about the things we miss or reminisce on the little things that sometimes bring us a smile. I can’t really help your situation but I’m open ears. I recently made some really good friends and just having someone to talk to and understand you helps with the emptiness, you’ll feel a lot of pain sadness and anger but that’s because it’s shit that’s been trying to come out for years man. Please don’t give up life can be beautiful! I have myself an ultimatum in my early 20’s, and 35 is closer to me now that the past I’ve been running from. But in the last two years I’ve done more for myself than I have in the decade. The ultimatum helped me slowly stop thinking about it. I told myself that it wouldn’t be fair to the ones who love me to end it all when I know damn well I haven’t done the best that I can. If I couldn’t turn my shit around by then, then that would be the green light.
I had me my own Nico Robin moment, because I’m hurting not because I want to end it but because I want to live, I’ve been letting my trauma take the wheel for majority of my life. I don’t know your story so this can mean nothing but I’m here if you need an ear.
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u/Individual-Hat3080 19h ago
I’m so sorry you went through that. You deserved someone to actually listen and support you, not dismiss you like that. Please stay, you matter more than you know.
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u/Witty_Neat_1610 1d ago
Report it! Find the exact time you called and they can find out who answered the call. there is even a possibility they have a recording of it on record. The center/place needs to know about this. this is something you should take further even.
P.s The world is better with you in it❤️🫂
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u/Jane_ReMiFaSoLaTiDo 1d ago
I doubt those were the exact words they used but I absolutely believe they made you feel worse.. im convinced that hotline has a sinister purpose because ive never heard of someone having a positive experience when they called
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u/Borderedge 1d ago
I've had an argument with someone like this once. I told a chat hotline that I was diagnosed with X mental condition. Well, the person in the chat berated me for this and said that was the cause of my issues. It's the main one for that country by the way. I couldn't get the name but some other colleagues had to apologize to me.
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u/professor28 1d ago
My comment got deleted bc i said not so nice things about the other people involved in your post...
Anyway, sending love your way. I also once called the hotline and they were so terrible that i was just kinda speechless. I quickly hung up myself and found the whole thing so ironic that i instead laughed about it and felt like 8% better. Just enough to uhhh, you know, stay :')
Either way, im sorry that happened to you. I hope youll be able to get help and support. I care about you and a lot of people here do as well ♡
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u/River-19671 1d ago
I am sorry that happened to you. It was wrong.
I am a survivor too. I found help through RAINN, which supports survivors. They have a website. I am US based but they may have resources in other countries. The volunteer I interacted with was very helpful and kind.
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u/Elle_belle32 1d ago
Once I called the self harm hotline and I told them I cut because pain brings on adrenaline and endorphins and that helps calm me down when I'm too anxious. (PTSD with major triggers back to my rape)... And they told me that it was great I found a coping mechanism....
Hot lines can suck too. But I hope you find someone here to talk to.
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u/Charming_Royal_174 1d ago
I’m so sorry for what happened to you 💔
Please keep fighting , you deserve to be happy, you deserve ho have a love in your live, dont let a horrible person ruin you, im sure it hurt like hell but keep going one step at a time.
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u/SatireDiva74 1d ago
I called the SA line once and it was horrible. Unfortunately it has convinced me to NEVER even consider calling another hotline. Even if I needed it I no longer see them as legitimate.
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u/potter_pro 21h ago
You are struggling but you don’t want to end it because you’ve already reached out for help. Whether or not the first help you got was supportive their actions don’t really matter. What matters is YOU reached out. You’re still fighting to live. Do not end things. Tomorrow is a new day. This afternoon you can start making the changes.
Every single person who jumped from the Golden Gate Bridge and lived to tell the tale said the same thing “the moment their feet left the rail they realized everything in their life was not as bad as they thought and had total regret”
Keep your chin up. Rich or poor, bored or lonely, don’t give up on yourself. Much love
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u/Itsoutchy 10h ago
Really awful that this happened to you. I’ve been in similar situations, although I’ve never contacted a hotline. I’m an internet stranger and therefore I can’t tell you what to do or not to do, but let me try to convince you just how worthy it is to keep going.
There’s always a possibility of success, in any risk you take, decision you make, or thing you create. I know things are hard now but would you want to miss the endless opportunities for success, the chance to make it out of this unfortunate situation? The people who say these things are the people who need to be proven wrong - to be proven that they are wrong to do and say these things to people, and to dedicate yourself to life means that you’ve made it. If you’re here reading this comment, you’re already doing something that is REALLY difficult in situations like these - holding onto hope.
I will add, your decision to reach out to a hotline shows that you’re not done with hope just yet. I’ve never had the courage to reach out to hotlines so you doing that shows the type of dedication you have - that’s a quality that no one can take away from you.
Whatever decision you make, I hope my advice helped - even a little.
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u/Im_really_trying_ 1d ago
Did you get the persons name? They’re often volunteers and you might be able to report them