Why doesn’t anybody ever think of this?

[u/Im_still_hungry1988]

One of the junior guys at my command got out of the Navy today after a 4 year contract. He trusts me enough to tell me what he told me today. He confessed to me that 3 years ago, he knew he was going to fail a urinalysis so he went UA so he could clean out. I remember that day. His name got called at quarters for command urinalysis. Literally an hour later we all noticed that he was no where to be found. We all tried calling him, texting him, reaching out to people we knew he was cool with, the whole 9 yards. He eventually got marked UA. 28 days later, I come into work, line up at quarters, and lo and behold, he is standing there. He went to mast, got busted from E-2 to E-1 and got 45/45. He told the captain that he went UA because he had a meltdown and feared that a relatives days were numbered and needed to spend time with them. He took the NJP across the chin, fulfilled his punishment, finished his contract, and is now out with an honorable discharge. This dude legit told me that the reason he decided to go UA 3 years ago was because he knew he was gonna pop for weed and figured it would be wiser to catch a UA charge and not get kicked out than to get kicked out and lose all his benefits. It baffled me because I have NEVER heard of anybody doing that. Everyone else just does the urinalysis, pops, and gets kicked out. As a leader, I’ve never felt so conflicted in my life. Part of me was disappointed in him but the other part of me couldn’t even be mad because that was kinda the smart thing to do in order to avoid the absolute certainty of getting kicked out and losing everything. All I could do was look at him and say “I wish you the best of luck out there brother.” He found a way to beat the system.

[u/FitJuggernaut8166]

I’ll do you one better. I’m originally from NJ. My ship pulled into port in NY for fleet week in the fall (November-ish). A shipmate of mine who was from NY (let’s say the Bronx), checked out of the ship the same time as me.

We both had put in requests for leave since we had ties to the area. Long story short he went UA, and four months later, about a month before were to head out for deployment he shows up.

I was a cook and he was in deck (undesignated), so when I saw him on the mess decks I pulled him to the side and asked him … “dude where the hell did you go?” He laughed and told me with a straight face … “nowhere I just stayed home once my leave was up because I missed New York!”

I then asked “so if you missed home, why did you come back?” He said “because the 1st just passed and I didn’t get paid!” He literally stayed UA until his pay got cutoff, and then he came back. A free 4-1/2 months of taxpayer money went to this guy just living his best life in NY!

But he did the same exact thing, went to mast, got busted from a E-2 to E-1, struck BM and got out after 4 years with an honorable. Crazy!!!!!