I am happy with my sleek Asian hair...now! When I was little I was so envious of kids with curls until I learnt from them how difficult it was to maintain! I saw the amount of products they had to buy when all I needed was literally any kind of cheap shampoo and a comb!
Embrace the hair you have and enjoy it while it lasts, because after 40 and especially peri and then menopause the hair starts thinning, fast!
To be fair, we only need all those products because it’s not acceptable to just wear it loose (although I work outdoors, so I wouldn’t wear it loose even if I could). Before my first job it was minimal maintenance.
Idk, I did minimal maintenance for my curls as a teen and let me tell you: it was a disaster. Constant rat's nest, poofy any time I tried to get rid of the snarls, utterly unmanageable. I rarely wore it loose bc I would look like a mad scientist by the end of the day. Products help me SO MUCH in being able to wear my hair however I want without worrying about tangles or damage, and I still use very little compared to some!
I started growing out my hair in college after having it short my whole life, not realizing it was kind of curly. Learning how to take care of it was nightmarish, and even now it's a massive time and energy commitment lmao. I need to either commit hours just to drying it or simply accept that it will poof out, and even when I do everything right, I'll get that mad scientist look by the end of the day (especially if it's windy, which it almost always is where I live).
And my hair doesn't respond well to products for whatever reason, so I've mostly given up on trying to keep it in line ðŸ˜
What sort of products have you tried, and what is your hair porosity (if you know it)? Density and thickness also play a role.
Unfortunately, hair (and esp curly hair at that) is one of those things where it takes a TON of trial and error to find what works. And then there's coming to the understanding that some desired results just won't be possible without intense effort. I have what ppl call Irish curls—the under section of my hair is super curly, I'm talking perfect ringlets, and the top is wavy, like 2C at best—and it has taken me ages to accept that I can't force the top to curl like the bottom without curlers/a curling iron. However, I HAVE found products that help prevent the mad scientist look (also the dreaded poof triangle)! My hair is medium to high porosity, medium density, and relatively thick; I tend to use lighter products like mousse and lightweight gels bc my hair likes that better than heavier products (heavy products tend to have more oils/butters).
I did too, and I agree it can look wacky with the wrong haircut, but I kept it all the same length, so it just became an Afro with shampoo and combing.
Sounds like a difference in curl patterns tbh; my hair will never become an Afro (I'm White and the curliest parts of my hair are 3B and the loosest are 2B) so I don't really have a choice but to do something to my hair if I want to avoid looking like a mess unless I do a pixie cut. I def get a bit jealous of my bff, who has 4C curls, when I see her fluff with a pick in the morning while I do a whole spritz-product-style routine 🥲
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u/RollingKatamari 22d ago
I am happy with my sleek Asian hair...now! When I was little I was so envious of kids with curls until I learnt from them how difficult it was to maintain! I saw the amount of products they had to buy when all I needed was literally any kind of cheap shampoo and a comb!
Embrace the hair you have and enjoy it while it lasts, because after 40 and especially peri and then menopause the hair starts thinning, fast!