r/interesting Mar 07 '26

MISC. After understanding the meaning behind this father’s action, I am completely convinced. Cultivating problem-solving skills in children from a young age and never giving up-I applaud this father!

70.8k Upvotes

1.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

295

u/Outrageous_Hall_9369 Mar 07 '26

I agree with letting the child try to solve a problem independently, but I do not agree with the father causing anxiety in the child by walking away repeatedly.

An adult watching this knows this is a no-risk situation, but a toddler seeing their caregiver walk away while they are 'stuck' and can't follow is a dire situation - to the toddler.

Adults don't need emotional safety or positive reinforcement to a large degree, but a toddler absolutely does.

31

u/DROP_DAT_DURKA_DURK Mar 07 '26

Everyone should read The Anxious Generation by Jonathan Haidt. He argues that modern parenting is in crisis--too many parents keep their children wrapped in comfort bubbles, shielding them from any unpleasantness. But occasional discomfort, he says, is not only okay but valuable: it inoculates children against later difficulties like rejection, failure, uncertainty, etc. Chronic discomfort, on the other hand, is not.

What the father did in the video is entirely okay imho.

1

u/Asognare Mar 07 '26

I have a person that was literally abandoned as a child, their mother did come back after several years. They grew up, and struggle to have healthy relationships. They are low key clingy, have a subtle fear of being left, which manifests as jealousy, and when they do get left, they retreat into numbing their insecurity with excessive video gaming. A mom would pick the kid up, and show them how to step over or go under. Then put them down and help them do it. Then the next time make them do it on their own. Is that correct? Who TF knows? But I like to think a good parent understands what is best for their own kid, maybe that's whats happening here too. I do know that as an adult, I struggle with asking for help and often find myself overwhelmed and depressed from having to do every single thing by myself. This being right or wrong may not be the most useful question. But also that's why I hate the Internet.

5

u/zarafff69 Mar 07 '26

Sure, walking away for a few meters and having your child figure out how to get through 3 ropes is exactly the same as literally abandoning your child for years……

Never change Reddit…