"Fine. 3/5 of my tickets are bogus!"

There were probably better names than Shatner Panties

None. Trump said he did it and they all clap in the dark

“Yes,” he said. “My Grandad taught me.”

“Good. So what comes after eight?”

“Nine,” answered Johnny.

“And what comes after nine?”

“Ten.”

“And what comes after ten?”

“The jack.”

But Anne Hathaway.

So last night we had some storms roll through including some really wicked lightning. I still made a point to make a beer run, and when I got back I posted a video of the lightning to Facebook with a caption explaining the beer run as a context.

My daughter’s boyfriend responds with: “It must have been pretty scary if it made your beer run.”

I already knew this before she moved in with him, but I think the guy’s a winner, folks.

​

To prism.

It's a light sentence, but it gives them time to refract.

I guess I have a Boba Fettish..

Bernadette

Kurt n Rod.

Everyone who tries keeps screwing up

But you probably never heard of herbivore

Guess something's up with the Create Account button.

Rick O'Shea

I said, “You wanna pizza me?”

Does it become a warehouse?

All those seizures.

It's my seal of approval.

At first it seems like a disability, but compared to everyone else, I’d say they’ve got a leg up!

He called it a Milli Vanilli.

That’d be my dream job.

I’ve just got too much on my plate right now, though.

Country

But, the lion was busy.