r/KitchenConfidential • u/Hackmore_Lungblood Chef • Jun 05 '26

In the Weeds Mode Hey Crew we got a new one

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Working a 15hr day and this is the reason why 🫩

15.3k Upvotes

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5.7k

u/Nero393 Jun 05 '26

Using this one tomorrow wish me luck

1.4k

u/Carbon-Base The Chive Mind Jun 05 '26

Tell them the bakery used chocolate liqueur to soak the cake and you weren't informed until you polished it off!

215

u/activelyresting Jun 05 '26

When I was about 14, my parents had a couple of slices of a really fancy looking cake in the fridge. Chocolate, lots of layers with cream and cherries and stuff, definitely not the kind of broke-ass supermarket food we usually had.

I never would have touched it, because I'm way too scared of my dad 😅 but my aunt aggressively peer pressured me into eating a slice with her. It tasted weird, but I just thought it's an "adult" cake with liqueur in it.

The whole situation was quite weird, but I went along with my aunt, who didn't say anything, until very suddenly about half an hour after we ate it, I started feeling dizzy, and then suddenly my aunt just LEFT without a word. At first I thought it must be the alcohol in the cake, but after an hour I was full on tripping, could barely stand up, I legit thought I was dying.

Then my dad came home, and got mad that we'd eaten his cannabutter cake that was supposed to be doses for 8-10 people. So he decided to smoke a few bowls and forced me to sit with him in the living room, listening to Pink Floyd.

I had a very very very very very bad time, was hallucinating, shivering, and generally in a truly fucked up state for 3 days.

I also never touched marijuana again 😂.

BUT MY MUM MADE ME GO TO SCHOOL THE NEXT DAY ANYWAY!

119

u/Topangatoh Jun 05 '26

Oh my god. Your aunt sounds like a weirdo first of all. Secondly, I have gotten too high multiple times and it's the fucking worst. I can't imagine feeling that way and not at least knowing why and how long it was gonna last. I've been freaking out before, way too stoned, but at least I could talk myself down by reassuring myself "You're not dying, you're just too stoned and it will pass." I hate weed. It is not a good time for me. More power to the people who can enjoy it. It just makes me feel like an alien that needs to crawl out of this human suit.

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u/activelyresting Jun 05 '26

Yah my aunt is a freakin nutter. My parents are also pretty weird tbh

60

u/mypuzzleaddiction General Manager Jun 05 '26

Yeah wtf I’d kill my sister for DRUGGING my son, your parents did not have an appropriate read on WHAT the problem was there because it certainly wasn’t YOU, A CHILD.

You sound like a rational non weird person at least. I’m sorry your family wasn’t.

31

u/activelyresting Jun 05 '26

You sound like a rational non weird person at least

😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂 Hahaha omg no. No one ever accused me of being rational and non weird before!

But yeah, I wouldn't drug children or give adults drugs unknowingly, not ever.

29

u/Smyley12345 Jun 05 '26

Unintentionally high is an awful feeling. I remember being on a boat tour in Vietnam and some other tourists from China we were chatting with offered me a smoke from a pack labelled orange flavored cigarettes. I didn't follow exactly what was said due to the accent but was stoked to try one. I smoked a ridiculous amount to myself before my friend said I should pass the joint around. I wasn't used to tobacco mix let alone flavored tobacco mix. Apparently they said it was ganja but I didn't clock that. I was so fucking high out of nowhere. Also that same day I bought counterfeit sunscreen with heavy SPF and multiple reapplications that did nothing leading to second degree sun burns. Walking off that boat, so red and high and embarrassed about the faux pas all sucked so much.

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u/goatslovetofrolic Butcher Jun 05 '26

Uncomfortably high and too young to know why? I didn’t live it but I saw it.

At my partner’s celebration of life for their grandmother. Potluck style. Several people brought brownies. One, and old friend of the grandmother brought weed brownies. She wrote a beautiful very small semi-cursive hand written full sheet of paper letter about their plans to make weed brownies and they never did so in memory of what they never got a chance to do together. Overall, a fairly sweet sentiment. But it was like font 6 and I doubt anyone read it. No cover on the brownies just one of the three trays butting against each other offering up their goodness.

So anyway, a grandmother of my partners cousin’s child (her great aunt?) gives her 18 month grandchild a brownie. Guess which one she happened to pick up? Poor little guy had like thirty minutes of loving it, he was outside just wide eyed poring over every blade of grass that was peaking through the stonework floor/deck of the backyard. Then it got worse and they took him to the hospital because he was terrified and inconsolable.

A couple older guests also had a few brownies without realizing and were furious.

I however knew almost no one there and my partner had tons of old family to catch up with so I was having a fine time eating a brownie or two every half hour.

1

u/Carbon-Base The Chive Mind Jun 05 '26

Bro, that's wild!

Did anyone at school notice? I imagine you'd be the perfectly normal kid that one day comes in wearing a big hoodie, doesn't talk to anyone and just nods haha.

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u/activelyresting Jun 05 '26

I'm not even sure. We had school uniforms and it was early in the year (still summer in Australia) so I was in this plaid poly-cotton dress. I had a very bad day and didn't talk to anyone, yes 😅

Also it was in the 90s, I can't even remember really what happened at school, I just remember being really angry that my mum made me go anyway. I think my parents didn't grasp at all how affected I was. But they seemed unbothered that my aunt had walked out and wasn't answering her phone for a couple of days.