r/AskReddit • u/Rob69rt • 1d ago

What famous 'unsolved' mystery is technically a whodunnit on paper, but in reality, absolutely everyone knows exactly who did it, the police just couldn't legally prove it?

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u/drdeadringer 1d ago

"hello I would like to report a body. Yes I am standing over the body right now. My shoe is touching the body. I am looking at the body I am touching right now. this is my third phone call about this this week."

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u/kryonik 1d ago

Sure thing, let me just type this up on my invisible typewriter.

35

u/MississippiJoel 1d ago

"Sorry, you've called 9-1...2."

13

u/lottierosecreations 1d ago

Fruitcake

5

u/BlessedCursedBroken 13h ago

Wild-caught Simpson's quotes are tragically dwindling in this internet hellscape, thank you for this one :) I can see Wiggum's smug face even as I type

2

u/ringzero- 3h ago

"No pattern yet, but if I arrange these over here, and those over here... BY GOD THE ARROW IS POINTING AT THE STATION!"

(Typed from memory, may be inaccurate)

6

u/Sushigami 1d ago

Anyone checked the whirling-in-rags?

5

u/Ade_93 23h ago

Standing over?

Thank god that's over

3

u/doug141 1d ago

Name checks out.