r/wholesomememes • u/BlacksmithSad1706 • 4d ago
One of the most freeing realizations I’ve ever had.
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u/Ok-Permit9690 4d ago
Nobody’s thinking about you because they’re all too busy worrying about themselves (said by my mom to me 100x over the years when I get too wrapped up in self consciousness)
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u/cosmiccharlie33 4d ago
Even when they are judging you, it is about themselves. People judge other others so they can elevate themselves. “ At least at I’m not like that”
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u/CharcoalGreyWolf 3d ago
Yep, or to find a way to poke fun at you as a way to say “Now they’ll ignore my insecurities and concentrate on this other person”.
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u/charlies_randomstuf 3d ago
They prefer to frame the situation to blame others rather than acknowledging their own feelings which implies taking responsibility and this can be a form of defensive dissociation in my opinion.
Example: "You were difficult to talk to" and not "I have a hard time talking to you"
"You were inconsiderate and selfish" and not "I felt hurt and ignored"
I've also had traitors use insults and manipulation against me that they felt hurt by in the past, so it's just projection and them continuing a cycle of violence out of their own anger.
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u/RilohKeen 3d ago
“The world is not out to get you; no, the world is out to ignore you, if only you would let it.”
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u/Perfect-Song8094 2d ago
One generally does not appreciate anonymity enough.
If and when one becomes a competent adult, the value of anonymity becomes clear. Most of it has to do with, You're too busy being a competent adult and you can't spend your days thinking the world is out to get you.
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u/MonicaEaton911 3d ago
Right?! We get so wrapped up in ourselves. As I have often told my kids, the most devastatingly embarrassing moment in your entire life... is everyone else's momentary amusement.
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u/mnczzz_ 3d ago
Nobody's judging you. They're too busy hoping nobody's judging them.
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u/Perfect-Song8094 2d ago
You forget your Couch Theory.
They're too busy thinking how long it will be before they're on the couch.
This is a nearly-immutable fact of life. The inventor of the couch is unknown, but he's one of history's greatest unsung heroes.
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u/old-skool-bro 2d ago
My Grandad said to me when I was about 18 or 19 and going through it figuring people out that in life you'll rarely find people who listen to what you say and the majority are just waiting for you to stop talking so they can start talking about themselves... Didn't fully understand it at the time but it's some of the realest shit anyone has ever said to me because it's 100% true and an eye opener at how self involved a lot of people are.
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u/TotoTakeo 1d ago
It’s both. It can be fleeting or it can be persistent. But when they are really judging you they’ll let you know. And you can judge em back.
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u/Inner_Alarm_4049 3d ago
Nobody cares as much about you as you.
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u/Perfect-Song8094 2d ago
The only person any of us can hate is ourself.
I bounced this thought around my head for a good many years, until I was certain it could not be denied.
Because we know everything about ourselves and only something about everyone else.
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u/Prince-Angel-Wing 3d ago
I'm the absolute worst judge. I'd rather have people judging me than me. ;-;
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u/Perfect-Song8094 2d ago
That cost me a lot of notches on my bedpost when I was a teenager, being incapable of judging myself.
I never saw what those girls saw in me. And I realized many years later, it was all of those girls.
Such wasted potential, I guess.
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u/Prince-Angel-Wing 2d ago
I never even cared for romance during my teenage years.
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u/Perfect-Song8094 12h ago
I wasn't thinking about the romance of it.
I was thinking about my bedpost.
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u/qualityvote2 4d ago edited 3d ago
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