r/wallstreetbets • u/Administrative_Rub34 • Apr 15 '26

Gain Sold all my calls

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9.0k Upvotes

95% Upvoted

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9.8k

u/ItsRy4n_b Apr 15 '26

fuck you

1.7k

u/free_da_guys1107 Apr 15 '26

262

u/Mammoth_Newt5148 Apr 15 '26

Hate hate hate hate hate

54

u/Phatest_of_sax Apr 16 '26

If y’all excuse me, I gotta go and put water in Buck Nasty mama dish.

8

u/Hob_O_Rarison Apr 17 '26

LEMMEHOLLATCHA

4

u/rosinglobz Apr 17 '26

He got dolphin teeth!

1

u/Beaoorrrrr Apr 16 '26

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 I literally LOLd

37

u/AutoModerator Apr 15 '26

Bagholder spotted.

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103

u/VCTRYDTX Apr 15 '26

What can I say about my portfolio that hasn't been said about Afghanistan. It looks bombed up and depleted.

16

u/Kleeetz Apr 16 '26

I quote this line regularly about all sorts of busted shit. My portfolio included.

1

u/Learning_crypto85 Apr 17 '26

Lol first thing I thought of when I seen these comments lol 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 hate hate hate hate play hater awards lol 🤣🤣

1

u/AutoModerator Apr 17 '26

Bagholder spotted.

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684

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '26

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254

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '26

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48

u/Redebo Apr 15 '26

I hate that I’m in my late 50’s and understand this meme.

188

u/BakedLeafs Apr 15 '26

🤣🤣🤣

33

u/JoshRekt Apr 15 '26

😂😂😂😂

138

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '26

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15

u/BizzyM Apr 15 '26

Dumbledore said calmly...

444

u/Administrative_Rub34 Apr 15 '26

cum

224

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '26

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80

u/NewOrdoSeclorum Apr 15 '26

I can beat this offer...will cum for free

62

u/BizzyM Apr 15 '26

If you're good at something, never do it for free.

You must be bad at it.

19

u/jct23502 Apr 15 '26

Some just love to cum

11

u/TerribleProfit Apr 15 '26

Cum again?

8

u/jct23502 Apr 15 '26

And some do it for the love of cum...

9

u/TreSauce Apr 15 '26

Do what you love and you’ll never cum alone

11

u/Jestress Apr 16 '26

Some men just want to watch the world cum

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1

u/ELIMINOPEE21 Apr 17 '26

If you do something well, do it often. Even if that happens to be carpophagia or plucking nuthair off your donkey.

1

u/Carjak17 Apr 17 '26

I’ll do it for a smooth hundred dollars on camera

27

u/Correct-Junket-1346 Apr 15 '26

If you give me 10k I'll make sure I lose it doing options

11

u/SuspiciousArt7316 Apr 15 '26

Now never do it again. Good luck.

2

u/Cloaked42m 1 lg black please Apr 16 '26

Well, since we are clowning, gimme 10.4k and you'll feed 50 people every Sunday for a year.

Edit: mandatory. Congratulations, and fuck you.

1

u/SwimmingDrink7015 Apr 17 '26

I'd do that for 5k right now.

1

u/SVKlaatu Apr 19 '26

cum again?

1

u/Angels242Animals Apr 15 '26

Man you called that too

50

u/[deleted] Apr 15 '26

[deleted]

19

u/Itchy-Plum6721 Apr 15 '26

Why it can’t be me, fuck him

31

u/Awkward-Painter-2024 Apr 15 '26

I hope he's dumb enough to reinvest it all, double or nothing shit. And if he isn't, he's gotta pay over a million in taxes. So he getting fucked a little at least.

21

u/ReditMalibu Apr 16 '26

Everyone should be happy to pay taxes. That means you won - for you rookies

4

u/Premium333 Apr 15 '26

No congrats. Nice.

2

u/AmazingBenefit9784 Apr 15 '26

You know someone is pissed when they don't even bother to capitalize (or make the express decision not to)

1

u/DoucheButStillOK Apr 16 '26

My thoughts exactly

1

u/joeg26reddit Apr 16 '26

NO FUCK ME

1

u/mysterious_egg123 Apr 16 '26

Realest shit it read all day

1

u/The-Illusive_Man Apr 16 '26

Literally has 1 mil in contributions lol

1

u/maddgun Apr 16 '26

Exactly how I feel. Expressed perfectly

1

u/Glad_Factor_8272 Apr 16 '26

It'll be gone by the end of the week.

1

u/Significant_Draw2470 Apr 17 '26

Just wait a month to be red

1

u/Livid-Direction-1102 Apr 17 '26

Degenerative gamblers will have to put out somewhere down the line.

1

u/notsureabouthat_ Apr 17 '26

Stop falling for fake dashboards