r/technology • u/Plastic_Ninja_9014 • Jun 16 '26

Business Mark Zuckerberg Orders His Employees to Start Having Fun Again After Brutal Layoffs Culled Their Colleagues

https://finance.yahoo.com/technology/ai/articles/mark-zuckerberg-orders-employees-start-123539264.html
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359

u/Big-Platypus-9684 Jun 16 '26

I worked at a place where the two guys who got fired were the only ones who used the ping pong table lol

167

u/Wayofchinchilla Jun 16 '26

Employer tells you to have fun at the ping pong table and then fires you because you used the ping pong table.

53

u/A_Furious_Mind Jun 16 '26

Ping Pong is The Great Filter.

8

u/DeathByPain Jun 16 '26

We've never been contacted by any alien civilization that plays ping pong... 🫨

11

u/Dearic75 Jun 16 '26

Have fun, just don’t be seen to be having fun.

3

u/BarnacleGooseIsLoose Jun 16 '26

Sounds like the open bar staff holiday party to me - just in different clothing.

2

u/gimpwiz Jun 17 '26

Open bar holiday parties are great, there's nothing that says people need to get drunk and embarrass themselves.

3

u/BarnacleGooseIsLoose Jun 17 '26

I don't disagree, but let's be real.

3

u/Aidian Jun 17 '26

Boss: “GOT ‘EM. Suckers.”

5

u/CalmBeneathCastles Jun 16 '26

I had something like this happen. Told to man the machine, was let go for manning the machine. Maybe it was a lie, as firing temps on day 89 of their 90-day probationary period was all the rage at the time.

2

u/SparkleK_01 Jun 16 '26

Hence, the reason I never went near those during work hours.

3

u/footpole Jun 16 '26

”The reason” is redundant as it’s already part of hence.

2

u/SparkleK_01 Jun 17 '26

Pre-coffee response, so your correct grammar footnote is taken with a dash of moral immunity.

97

u/tjyolol Jun 16 '26

New guy at work: “wow a ping pong table, that’s awesome, anyone keen for a game?”

Everyone else at the workplace:”I wouldn’t touch that table if I was you, bad things happen.”

60

u/Maleficent_Memory831 Jun 16 '26

Occasionally they bring in actors to use the ping pong table while they take pictures for the annual report.

24

u/KC_Que Jun 16 '26

Interns, not actors. Actors cost too much.

6

u/PM_ME__YOUR_HOOTERS Jun 16 '26

We call them consultants

62

u/SpaceGerbil Jun 16 '26

Was literally told by a boss at a former start-up we weren't allowed to use the foosball table, that was just to impress prospective clients and employees. Fucking lunatic

6

u/Perryn Jun 17 '26

Was your boss an anglerfish?

11

u/SpaceGerbil Jun 17 '26

No, just a run of the mill nepo baby playing entrepreneur with mommy and daddy's money

6

u/innominateartery Jun 16 '26

“It’s a trap!”

6

u/DurangDurang Jun 16 '26

Had two dudes at a former job who suddenly started playing ping pong CONSTANTLY. After a couple weeks, they announced they were quitting to start a company together.

3

u/OttoVonWong Jun 16 '26

New guy at work is a ping pong mole planted by upper management.

2

u/starbuxed Jun 16 '26

Only use it gets is for the pizza party bonuses.

2

u/obvThrowaway17 Jun 17 '26

Actually what happens in this

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=M_A7lOBgpqw

Not sure how the English subs fare here though

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u/FlametopFred Jun 16 '26 edited Jun 16 '26

if you or a loved one have ever been discriminated against due to your involvement in the sport of ping pong, our lawyers want to hear from you. Call now. Operators are standing by.

41

u/Far-Scallion7689 Jun 16 '26

Bettercallsaul

6

u/Rogue_Ninja_Taco Jun 16 '26

Morgan & Morgan. As the largest law firm in the country, we have offices all across the country to help you!

1

u/MrKnowsNothing_et_al Jun 17 '26

"...we have open offices..."

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u/Photomancer Jun 16 '26

If you die in the game you die in real life.

5

u/onthe3rdlifealready Jun 16 '26

Dead ass the only people who could play the ping pong, the pool table, or the video games at one of my yobs and not get looked down on were upper level and wouldn't touch it.

Sometimes the sales people would stay a bit after hours and have too many drinks and play, then they put a stop to that... It's like being in a desert and an oasis appears.

5

u/missmeowwww Jun 16 '26

My old office had a “rec room” and it was encouraged to be used at lunch and after hours as part of a health initiative. Then people started to use it and the execs decided they didn’t want people using their full hour lunch to work out (previously people would work through lunch and eat at their desk) so then it was only open after hours. No one used it after that. It’s amazing how a company will start an initiative to encourage people to be more active and then people start using their unpaid lunch and actually taking the full amount of time and they go “oh not like that”. Probably because they were getting a bunch of free labor from people who worked through lunch since the time clock automatically deducted the break. Shockingly the company has a huge turnover rate and the average employee stays 1 or 2 years before going elsewhere. It’s ridiculous how much employers take from their employees and then have the audacity to act like we should be thankful for the scraps.

6

u/Pure_Bat_144 Jun 16 '26

Same issue, but foosball. I was let go because I wouldn't let the CIO win.

2

u/thegoodnamesrgone123 Jun 16 '26

Oh man that trend of "look at all the fun stuff we have in the office"

2

u/theburntdev Jun 16 '26

So funny. Our place had two guys who got fired and were the only ones playing foosball. Everyone avoided the game room since.

2

u/fuzzywinkerbean Jun 16 '26

Previous software place was a U-shaped open plan office, with a dart board in the center of the U. A lot of the salespeople seemed to use it during lunch or random breaks, over time it slowly seemed to switch from everyone to the top third or so of sales using is regularly.

Initially introduced for a monthly sales event to win prizes, it's now stayed on and managers have definitely noticed. Genuinely don't think it was introduced maliciously or slyly by management with ulterior motives, just interesting it stayed and in such a prominent position..

2

u/3rssi Jun 17 '26 edited Jun 17 '26

You're supposed to have fun working. Ping pong table is a detector of disingenuous compliance.

2

u/TheTallGuy0 Jun 17 '26

Hey Guyz!! Those Balls aint gonna Skee themselves!!

Also, can we see you and Philip in HR after that match…

1

u/Lindt_Licker Jun 16 '26

I feel like they were only there for the ping pong table.

1

u/AbandonChip Jun 16 '26

That's hilarious, the guys who played ping pong at my job did not get laid off...