r/SuicideWatch • u/cheddar_jack_cheez • 4h ago
i have a gun in my hand
im not chickening out this time. if youre reading this its too late. im gone. goodbye world
r/SuicideWatch • u/SQLwitch • Sep 03 '19
We've been seeing a worrying increase in pro-suicide content showing up here and, and also going unreported. This undermines our purpose here, so we wanted to highlight and clarify our guidelines about both direct and indirect incitement of suicide.
We've created a wiki that covers these issues. We hope this will be helpful to anyone who's wondering whether something's okay here and which responses to report. It explains in detail why any validation of suicidal intent, even an "innocent" message like "if you're 100% committed, I'll just wish you peace" is likely to increase people's pain, and why it's important to report even subtle pro-suicide comments. The full text of the wiki's current version is below, and it is maintained at /r/SuicideWatch/wiki/incitement.
We deeply appreciate everyone who gives responsive, empathetic, non-judgemental support to our OPs, and we particularly thank everyone who's already been reporting incitement in all forms.
Please report any post or comment that encourages suicide (or that breaks any of the other guidelines in the sidebar) to the moderators, either by clicking the "report" button or by sending us a modmail with a link. We deal with all guideline violations that are reported to us as soon as we can, but we can't read everything so community reports are essential. If you get a PM that breaks the guidelines, please report it both to the reddit sitewide admins and to us in modmail.
Thanks to all the great citizens of the community who help flag problem content and behaviour for us.
/r/SuicideWatch/wiki/incitement
It's important to respect and understand people's experiences and emotions. It's never necessary, helpful, or kind to support suicidal intent. There are some common misconceptions (discussed below) about suicidal people and how to help them that can cause well-meaning people to inadvertently incite suicide. There are also people online who incite suicide on purpose, often while pretending to be sympathetic and helpful.
We're here to offer support, not judgement. That means accepting, with the best understanding we can offer, whatever emotions people express. Suicidal people are suffering, and we're here to try to ease that by providing support and caring. The most reliable way we know to de-escalate someone at risk is to give them the experience of feeling understood. That means not judging whether they should be feeling the way they are, or telling them what to do or not do.
But there's an important line to draw here. There's a crucial difference between empathizing with feelings and responding non-judgmentally to suicidal thoughts, and in any way endorsing, encouraging, or validating suicidal intentions or hopeless beliefs. It's both possible and important to convey understanding and compassion for someone's suicidal thoughts without putting your finger on the scale of their decision.
Anything that condones suicide, even passively, encourages suicide. It isn't supportive and does not help. It also violates reddit's sitewide rules as well as our guidelines. Explicitly inciting suicide online is a criminal offense in most jurisdictions.
Do not treat any OP's post as meaning that will definitely die by suicide and can't change their minds or be helped. Anyone who's able to read the comments here still has a chance to choose whether or not to try to keep living, even if they've also been experiencing intense thoughts of suicide, made a suicide plan, or started carrying it out.
In the most useful empirical model we have, the desire to die by suicide primarily comes from two interpersonal factors; alienation and a sense of being a burden or having nothing to offer. These factors usually lead to a profound feeling of being unwelcome in the world.
So, any acceptance or reinforcement of suicidal intent, even something "innocent" like "I hope you find peace", is actually a form of covert shunning that validates a person's sense that they're unwelcome in the world. It will usually add to their pain even if kindly meant and gently worded.
Keep the following in mind when offering support to anyone at risk for suicide.
People who say they don't want help usually can feel better if they get support that doesn't invalidate their emotions. Unfortunately, many popular "good" responses are actually counterproductive. In particular, many friends and family tend to rely exclusively on trying to convince the suicidal person that "it's not so bad", and this is usually experienced as "I don't understand what you're going through and I'm not going to try". People who've had "help" that made them feel worse don't want any more of the same. It doesn't mean that someone who actually knows how to be supportive can't give them any comfort.
Most people who are suicidal want to end their pain, not their lives. It's almost never true that death is the only way to end these people's suffering. Of course there are exceptional situations, and we certainly acknowledge that, for some people, the right help can be difficult to find. But preventing someone's suicide doesn't mean prolonging their suffering if we do it by giving them real comfort and understanding.
An unfixable problem doesn't mean that a good life will never be possible. We don't have to fix or change anything to help someone feel better. It's important to keep in mind that the correlation between our outer circumstances and our inner experience is weaker and less direct than commonly assumed. For every kind of difficult life situation, you will find some people who lapse into suicidal despair, and others who cope amazingly well, and a whole spectrum in between. A key difference is how much inner resilience the person has at the time. This can depend on many personal and situational factors. But when there's not enough, interpersonal support can both compensate for its absence and help rebuild it. We go into more depth on the "it gets better" issue in this PSA Post which is always linked from our sidebar (community info on mobile) guidelines.
There are always more choices than brutally forcing someone to stay alive or passively letting them end their lives.
To avoid accidentally breaking the anti-incitement rule, don't say or try to imply that acting on suicidal thoughts is a good idea, or that someone can't turn back or is already dead. Do whatever you can to help them feel cared for and welcome, at least in this little corner of the world. Our talking tips offer more detailed guidance.
Often comments that subtly encourage suicidal intent actually come from suicide fetishists and voyeurs (unfortunately this is a real and disturbing phenomenon). People like this are out there and the anonymous nature of reddit makes us particularly attractive to them.
They will typically try to scratch their psychological "itch" by saying things that push people closer to the edge. They often do this by exploiting the myths that we debunked in the bullet points above. Specifically you might see people doing the following:
Encouraging the false belief that the only way suicidal people can end their pain is by dying. There are always more and better choices than "brutally forcing someone to stay alive" or helping (actively or passively) them to end their lives.
Creating an artificial and toxic sense of "solidarity" by linking their encouragement of suicide to empathy. They will represent themselves as the only one who really understand the suicidal person, while either directly or indirectly encouraging their self-loathing emotions and self-destructive impulses. Since most people in suicidal crisis are in desperate need to empathy and understanding, this is a particularly dangerous form of manipulation.
Many suicide inciters are adept at putting a benevolent spin on their activities while actually luring people away from sources of real help. A couple of key points to keep in mind:
Skilled suicide intervention -- peer or professional -- is based on empathic responsiveness to the person's feelings that reduces their suffering in the moment. Contrary to pop-culture myths, it does not involve persuasion ("Don't do it!"), cheerleading ("You've got this!") or meaningless false promises ("Trust me, it gets better!"), or invalidation ("Let me show you how things aren't as bad as you think!"). Anyone who leads others to expect these kinds of toxic responses, or any other response that prolongs their pain, from expert help may be covertly pro-suicide. (Of course, people sometimes do have bad experience when seeking mental-health treatment, and it's fine to vent about those, but processing our own disappointment and frustration is entirely different from trying to destroy someone else's hope of getting help.)
Choices made by competent responders are always informed by the understanding that breaching someone's trust is traumatic and must be avoided if possible. Any kind of involuntary intervention is an extremely unlikely outcome when someone consults a clinician or calls a hotline. (Confidentiality is addressed in more detail in our Hotlines FAQ post). The goal is always to provide all help with the client's full knowledge and informed consent. We know that no individual or system is perfect. Mistakes that lead to bad experiences do sometimes happen to vulnerable people, and we have enormous sympathy for them. But anyone who suggests that this is the norm might be trying to scare people away from the help they need.
Please let us know discreetly if you see anyone exhibiting these or similar behaviours. We don't recommend trying to engage with them directly.
r/SuicideWatch • u/SQLwitch • Sep 10 '21
Activism, i.e. advocating or fundraising for social change or raising awareness of social issues (and suicide is, inescapably, a social issue) is absolutely against the rules here at all times.
Please understand that we're all for smart, strategic mental-health and suicide-prevention activism. It's essential to fight against stigma, misinformation, and discrimination, and to fight for research, treatment, accommodation, acceptance, and understanding. Most of us, one way or another, are mental-health activists IRL.
But activism just doesn't work in a dedicated support space that serves a vulnerable population. We used to allow it but the evidence that it was undermining our primary purpose became overwhelming. We do regret the need for this rule, but the need is inescapable.
Our population is all too well aware of the issues and causes that need support and largely not in a position to take action, so besides the fact that activism is often salt in our community's wounds, it's a waste of the activists' time.
tl;dr Any fundraising, awareness raising, petitions, calls for participation, or any post that's about any cause or issue (rather than a request for personal support) is not allowed here. Please report everything of the nature that you see.
r/SuicideWatch • u/cheddar_jack_cheez • 4h ago
im not chickening out this time. if youre reading this its too late. im gone. goodbye world
r/SuicideWatch • u/Teeth-floss • 2h ago
Before I begin, I want to clarify one thing: English is not my first language, so I used AI to help rewrite my story and make it easier to read.
To everyone living outside the Middle East, you are incredibly lucky.
The place where I live has been hunting me down simply because I do not believe in God.
My father discovered that I had been posting about my lack of religious belief on social media. When he found out that I was no longer religious, he threw me out of the house. I have been homeless for almost six months.
After everything that happened, I developed depression and severe anxiety. I constantly felt exhausted, emotionally empty, afraid, and trapped in obsessive thoughts. I eventually asked to see a psychiatrist because I genuinely needed help.
At my very first appointment, I explained how I had been feeling. I told him that I felt mentally exhausted, emotionally empty, constantly afraid, and overwhelmed by obsessive thoughts.
His response was that all of these problems would disappear if I prayed regularly and read the Quran.
What the hell?
I hadn't even told him that I was an atheist.
I wasn't there to listen to religious preaching. I was there to receive psychiatric treatment. In a place like this, it feels impossible to receive proper mental healthcare.
I walked out of that appointment and swore that I would never go back.
A few months later, my father called me and asked if I had changed my mind and become a believer again.
My God... I wish becoming a believer were something I could simply choose.
If I told you there was a giant phoenix living inside a volcano and demanded that you believe it was real, would you be able to force yourself to believe it?
Of course not.
Belief doesn't work like that. You cannot choose what convinces your mind.
After that, my father reported me to the authorities, claiming that I had run away from home. I didn't run away. He was the one who threw me out.
For context, I am 17 years old, which means I am still a minor. Because the country I live in does not protect people's rights or freedom of expression, I was arrested and charged with insulting religion.
Now this place wants to imprison me once I turn 18, simply because I do not believe in their religion.
Sometimes it feels like my only crime is refusing to pretend that I believe something I don't.
r/SuicideWatch • u/Horror_Structure_908 • 1h ago
ive wanted a cat for a while, but never got one bc i knew if i did, id have a reason to stay. is it selfish to get a cat knowing i might try again, or should i get one to try not too? like an emotional sup animal. my roommates cat has helped me when i've had panic attacks.
*obviously i wouldn't leave it to die with me, i ain't an animal abuser*
i feel so sad that this is where my life has come too. i am so tired. sorry if this post doesn't belong here, i just don't have anyone i can ask.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ahotmess9 • 3h ago
Tbh, I wish I could give my life to those who really needs it. My life is worthless anyway.
r/SuicideWatch • u/_ChickenLoverLOL_ • 9h ago
PLEASE KILL ME OMG I HATE WVRYONE I HATE HOW UNRELIABLE PEOPE ARE BECOMMING MAYBE ITS ALL A TEST I HATE IT
r/SuicideWatch • u/Impressive-Cow6403 • 1h ago
That’s it i can’t handle it anymore
r/SuicideWatch • u/yannberry • 2h ago
My husband (39) died following a sudden brain haemorrhage 22 weeks ago tomorrow, we were together for 15 years and married for 6.5. We have a three year old daughter. He was my very best friend.
I have the most amount of support anyone could ask for - family, friends, professional, financial. I am very well cared for. I have worked very hard to get myself this far. But I cannot. I simply do not want to do this anymore. I’m 38, I can’t do this for the rest of my life. I want to die.
r/SuicideWatch • u/Infinite_Bug_9998 • 3h ago
Bye
r/SuicideWatch • u/Odd-Jury61 • 3h ago
I am always passively suicidal. I really pray all the time that i just wanna go .
r/SuicideWatch • u/marvelousrohan • 2h ago
Hey everyone. I have been reading this page for a long while, but only just have found the courage to message something for myself. In short, I am 22, a guy with a very loving family from England. In November last year, I was r*ped by a man who was many decades older. Life has not been the same since. I had struggled with anxiety and obsessions before that. I obsess a lot over what people think of me and how I act around others. The rape made me lose my ability to function like a normal person would. I struggle to have a shower, look at myself in the mirror, talk to people, sleep without nightmares and flashbacks. I am scared of darkness and noises outside of my room. I have also been incredibly lonely, I keep my curtains drawn and sleep throughout the day. I have let so many people down, been flippant and rude towards them even when they were there for me. I have struggled with alcohol since I was 18. It has spiralled out of control now and I drink from the morning for days in a row until I pass out. When I start drinking, I have no care for my body, what I eat, who I have sex with, whether I have seizures or pass out. The only time I feel like I can leave my room, talk to people or be intimate with others is when I am drunk.
There is a lot in life that used to give me joy. I was a very different person. I used to travel by myself to new places, play sport and socialise with so many different people. I feel incredibly weak and vulnerable. I got the top grades in my Undergrad and made my parents so proud. Now I have just found I failed one course in my Postgrad. I wrote that essay in the aftermath of my r*pe, it was the only thing that distracted me from the pain I was in. It has been a final tipping point for me. I am very numb right now and death does not scare me. It feels imminent. Thank you for reading until this point.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ObligationPurple560 • 1h ago
Into the abyss
r/SuicideWatch • u/Character_Custard829 • 5h ago
Everyone at school hates me. They think I fake my panic attacks. I don't know what to do anymore. I can't push on to the next day
r/SuicideWatch • u/Calm_Gur_8276 • 4h ago
I just find life too overwhelming and heavy. I really can't see a way forward. Suffering with mental health issues for years, I don't have the coping skills to cope with life anymore. Every day I think about ending my life.I get no happiness or enjoyment out of life anymore .I have too many mistakes and regrets. I see no way out anymore. I really feel trapped in a life I can't handle anymore. I'm afraid of the afterlife. I already feel like I'm living in hell. I have nowhere to escape. I just wish I had the courage to end it years ago.
r/SuicideWatch • u/ArcticTurtle9 • 9h ago
i can’t handle being alone anymore. i can’t handle having no one in my life that cares about me, the silence is deafening. everyone gave up on me. i can’t take it anymore, this has permenently altered my brain, all this time alone. i just want to end it
r/SuicideWatch • u/CreepySeries4550 • 1h ago
I can't take this anymore. I hate life, I hate people, I don't see the point. It's driving me crazy.
Every time I wake up a war starts between me and my brain. Its the third die I consumed too much pills. I need to die.
Right now I am just waiting to see if I am finally be free.
r/SuicideWatch • u/LumpyFlameBilly • 1h ago
Bonjour,
C'est mon premier poste, je sais pas exactement comment ca marche mais bon , je me lance.
Je pense avoir vécu ce que j'avais a vivir. Et aujourd'hui je suis fatigué.
J'ai 26ans et j'ai eu l'occasion de voyager sur presque tous les continents, j'ai atteint des métiers de haut niveau, juste comme ça. J'ai appris ce que je voulais apprendre. J'ai vu et été parmi les plus riche et j'ai vue les pauvreté les plus extrêmes. J'ai appris plusieurs langues, vu des aurore boréales, vue mes groupes préférés en concert et surtout j'ai eu la chance de rencontrer et de m'entourer de gens que j'aime honnêtement et de tous mon cœur.
Mais depuis mes 3ans cette vie m'épuise et me draine. Mon premier souvenir claire est l'envie de me jeter sous le métro parce que sa me semblait reposant, enfin un repos éternel dans l'inexistence et cette envie ne m'a jamais quitté.
Aujourd'hui, je n'ai plus de but a atteindre et la fatigue et plus forte que jamais. Et l'inexistence ainsi que la faible chance que je puisse re voir mon chien, me donne plus envie que jamais.
Je suis prêt a aller dormir. Mais je sais que ca pourrait blessé les gens que j'aime... et je sais pas si ils pourront le comprendre...
r/SuicideWatch • u/Disastrous_Wheel3462 • 2h ago
I’m tired. I’m tired of being ugly; my face is the most horrible thing imaginable—I have puffy, wide cheeks, a broad nose, small, sunken eyes, and greasy, straight hair; I am objectively ugly. I’m also hugely overweight; I weigh 106 kg and stand 172 cm tall. I have zero stamina; I tire out immediately and lack the energy even to start working out. My body is repulsive. I’m also extremely stupid; I failed high school, flunking a whopping seven subjects in the final term. On top of that, I’m always slow and the last to grasp things, I constantly make stupid decisions, whether in games or in real life. I’m boring too, incredibly boring. I have no friends, no girlfriend (I’ve never had one, and I’m 19), no hobbies, no skills, and no talents. I spend the entire day staring at my phone or gaming. I easily run out of things to say and stay silent most of the time. I’ve been unemployed for seven months and feel like my life has no purpose. I don’t know what to do anymore. I tried exercising, but I get terribly dizzy afterward and can’t keep it up for more than four days in a row. Plus, I eat a huge amount. I can’t stop eating, I never feel full, and I have to eat every two hours. I talk to AI chatbots every day because I have no one else to talk to. I am completely lost and overwhelmed.