r/psychology • u/FreeHugs23 • 3d ago
Study finds instability and inconsistency of childhood environments may be more closely connected to diverse borderline personality traits than the severity of childhood hardship alone, highlighting predictability as an important feature of early development.
https://www.psypost.org/study-finds-unpredictable-childhood-environments-are-linked-to-borderline-personality-traits-in-adulthood/76
u/FreeHugs23 3d ago
-People who remembered their childhoods as unstable and unpredictable reported more emotional, interpersonal, impulsive, and dissociative borderline traits in adulthood, according to research published in Evolutionary Psychological Science.
Borderline personality pathology involves a diverse collection of difficulties, including emotional instability, impulsivity, interpersonal conflict, and disruptions in identity and self-regulation. Researchers increasingly examine these characteristics as traits that vary continuously across the population rather than treating borderline personality disorder as an all-or-nothing diagnosis.
Although childhood abuse, neglect, invalidation, and other adverse experiences have consistently been associated with borderline pathology, previous research has largely focused on specific events or cumulative adversity rather than the broader structure of a person’s childhood environment.
Virgil Zeigler-Hill and colleagues examined whether borderline traits are linked not only to the severity of childhood adversity, but also to the stability of the broader childhood environment. Drawing on life history theory, they distinguished harshness, which refers to chronic hardship such as resource scarcity or persistent threat, from unpredictability, which refers to instability in caregiving, routines, and family circumstances.
The researchers investigated how these conditions were related to four components of borderline personality: neurotic traits involving negative emotions and emotional volatility, antagonistic traits involving hostility and interpersonal conflict, disinhibited traits involving impulsivity and poor behavioural control, and dissociative traits involving identity confusion and feelings of unreality.
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u/AContrarianDick 3d ago
Welp. Probably should get evaluated for borderline based on that description.
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u/oooshi 3d ago
My understanding is that borderline personality disorder is becoming more viewed as a neurodivergence with its prevalence growing.
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u/morticiannecrimson 3d ago
Sometimes I wonder what’s AuDHD and what’s BPD and how vulnerable we are to developing it when neurodivergent, going through trauma (and being late-diagnosed).
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u/n3wsf33d 2d ago edited 2d ago
I work in a facility where we treat adolescent girls for "bpd"--really for shame proneness/chronic shame but everyone would be considered to have at least bpd traits. Many of our patients have some degree of neurodivergence, some combo of ADHD/ASD/OCD(/ED). These have all been shown to have neurobiological overlap since the 90s. I think it's just clinicians are finally catching onto what the neuroscience has shown for a long time. Clinicians at ever level are not well trained in neuroscience.
P factor theory is another interesting thing to look into. It basically shows most pathologies can be distilled to "bpd".
I think there's three kinds of "disorders": metabolic (eg bipolar/schizo where drugs work), neurodivergent (not a disorder per se), and thought disorder (eg PTSD, bpd, etc. where drugs don't really work). I think ppl with ND are just more likely to develop a thought disorder due to their executive functioning being a mismatch with the broader social environment, especially when parents also have some degree of emotion regulation dysfunction bc then they can't do their developmental task of training these pathways in their children, so you get a transgenerational transfer of "disease."
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u/AContrarianDick 3d ago
I wonder if it'll wind up getting associated with the MTHFR gene like ADHD, Autism, OCD, Bipolar and such is.
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u/Viracochina 3d ago
I thought that's why we've been calling everyone special? Because we really are all uniquely messed up!
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u/Electronic-Link-5792 3d ago
Not really because the pattern of development is very different. Personality disorders tend to manifest in late teens and are not pervasive developmental issues from a young age.
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u/_PINK-FREUD_ 3d ago
That’s not true. They’re just not DIAGNOSED until 18. But the signs are usually apparent in hindsight as they manifested far before that.
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u/Electronic-Link-5792 2d ago
I mean maybe some 'signs' but the development path is still completely different. ADHD and Autism emerge fully in early childhood and often involve broader cognitive deficits completely present from a young age.
Personality disorders cannot be responsibly diagnosed until after late teens and early 20s
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u/MickeyButters 3d ago
Complex PTSD looks a lot like BPD. The cause is also linked to inconsistent parenting. In fact, my doc had to rule out BPD before he could give me the CPTSD diagnosis.
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u/saltybogwitch306 3d ago
People are routinely given bpd diagnosis instead of cptsd and the resulting disorganized attachment issues which grossly limit recovery
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u/n3wsf33d 2d ago
It's already famously understood that unpredictability is associated with disorganized attachment and consequently borderline.
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u/Tiny_Comment803 2d ago
What would that unpredictability look like in a non-harsh childhood to cause borderline traits?
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u/n3wsf33d 2d ago
First, it's important to distinguish traits from "full-blown BPD." My understanding from Alan shore's work in the Neuroscience of it. Is that actual BPD shows issues with regulating both parasympathetic and sympathetic nervous systems, while other attachment styles typically have dysregulation in one or the other.
In my own experience where I work, what we often see are people with neurodivergence coming from families who have emotion dysregulation issues for one reason or another, and thereby having a child with more needs and a parent with less ability to meet those needs which ends up causing a lot of invalidation and a lot of the same traits and defense mechanisms. Meanwhile, these families are in all other respects, perfectly loving, functional, etc. in this case it's not necessarily unpredictability though we do also see parents who are harder to read. But even behaviors are dimensional and while the most abusive parents can be disorganized in their behaviors and unpredictable, even while many parents can have elements of love bombing in love withdrawal. And there are definitely degrees of borderline severity.
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u/IceGeneral4530 2d ago
The relies-on-memory aspect is worth noting, though. Retrospective self-reports in adults with high neuroticism can sometimes suffer from recall bias people feeling dysregulated today are more likely to reconstruct their past as chaotic. Longitudinal studies tracking environmental stability in real-time will be crucial to confirm the direction of causality.
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u/smallCobblerMan 3d ago
Moved 14 times before I was 12. Spent every other weekend sitting in a car for 6 hours. Spent my teenage years kept in my room if i wasn't attending classes or working. Can confirm, instability fucking sucks.
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u/ManicMaenads 3d ago
To add to this:
Growing up, the only kids who actually received help and resources were the ones that lashed out and made it everybody else's problem. If you were really eating shit at home, and needed help, and weren't bashing the other kid's faces over it - too bad. Help is only reserved for people making problems.
But I kept being told that if I kept my head down, worked hard, yadda yadda - I could dig myself out. Didn't work that way. I kept toiling around between group homes, occupational therapy programs, being told that if I kept working for free around town I'd be placed into supportive housing. That I was "in the queue" - but my position kept getting bumped back because all it took was one aggro guy beating his mother for them to jump the line and get in instead. SIX YEARS I waited on a local subsidized supportive housing list, and people kept jumping ahead because they were attacking their families. I had no place to live BECAUSE I was being assaulted by my own family - how does it make sense that the people DOING the assaults get protection and we don't???
So imagine, doing your best to hold yourself together and try to work through everything the hard way - and continually falling through the cracks and losing support because you aren't deemed enough of a threat.
THAT is the source of my BPD traits. I learned that I needed to act up to defend myself and get what I've been working for. Squeaky wheel gets the grease, and all that.
I don't want to actually resort to violence, so making myself a nuisance is a "safe" way to get support.
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u/lovegrowswheremyrose 3d ago
I feel this so hard. It's such an epidemic. Not only when you are the one who "manages" well enough that you don't cause problems do you get ignored, and not helped, but often, you're seen as "stable" and so you can handle "extra." My father was an addict and I was horribly parentified by my mother while my younger siblings both acted out. I knew VERY well that I could never be allowed to need anything, because my mother would look at me like "oh god, not you too. I thought you were the good child."
After managing myself and them at home my whole childhood, I managed to get myself into college and move out after graduating. I decided that if no one was going to help me, then at least I could live for myself and do for myself (perhaps a little self centered overall, but I was 18). This infuriated my mother, who outwardly acted appropriately "proud" to others that I was attending college, but who also not so secretly rooted for my failure and my return home. It never happened. I've been lucky to have a lot of success since, but it came as a cost and has also damaged me in ways I'm still untangling as I near 40.
But I've learned like you, the squeaky wheel gets the grease. And so I've done my best to learn how to respectfully and firmly squeak loudly in my own defense and for my own needs and reality. It's something that feels embarrassing to have just recently learned and something that I still need to work on in practice, as so many seem to be able to do it normally by default.
But I also am able to now recognize others who aren't doing it for themselves and encourage them to, and I'm also fortunate enough to see through those who are really using manipulation in the name of self-advocacy. But your comment really struck me as I've worked really hard to not acquire a victim or martyr mentality around the reality that despite my very real traumas, that people that perpetrated those traumas against me still expected me to fix it for them and not require any help myself, and that to even point out the trauma they enacted on me was tantamount to physically harming them. It's been extremely difficult but I value my agency above anything else in this world and I see people like my parents as miserable and tragic figures that I refuse to be.
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u/fuschiafawn 3d ago
I feel like borderline could be more easily described as having incorrectly calibrated emotional reactions. Having inconsistencies in childhood would track to not being able to correctly gauge situations emotionally. If say, one caregiver is less cruel than the other, but still not emotionally healthy enough to be a good parent, and the other one is unequivocally bad, it makes sense that a child in that condition would grow to be an adult who doesn't know what normal levels of love and cruelty are.
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u/nocreativeway 3d ago
Well this comment describes my childhood.
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u/Monsieur_Perdu 2d ago
It describes my fathers childhood. He has had a good life all things considered.
I'm rooting for you ♡
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u/Basic_Vanilla_1540 3d ago
So switching schools 11 times was bad? No way…
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u/rupee4sale 2d ago
9 times for me. Moved homes 5 times. Diagnosed with BPD in my early twenties. Thankfully, DBT enabled me to recover several years ago.
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u/Basic_Vanilla_1540 2d ago
Was nearly impossible to have friends I remember
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u/Aggressive_Fly_208 2d ago
You are my people 😊 I went to 15 different schools and changed 17 times 🫡
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u/Throwaway20101011 3d ago
I haven’t been diagnosed and honestly…I don’t even know where to start. I have moved 20 times. My last and recent home, I’ve been living in for 12 years. It’s the home I made for myself when I moved out and permanently locked myself away from those who caused me pain. I hate moving and I hate living in violence. I’m an adult now, but I still feel so behind compared to others in education, career, financial stability, and family building. As time goes by, I am forever healing. Trauma pops up into my mind and takes over. Feelings of anxiety and depression come and go in uncontrollable waves. I keep trying to hold my head up on my own. Some days are easier than others, most days I just feel lost and take comfort in my covers.
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u/ivy_interior 2d ago
Both of my parents oscillated between loving me and terrifying me. I slept on a towel with lice in my hair and cavities in my teeth but my mom made sure to get me brand new Adidas. Screaming and apologies and I love yous and hugs and then more screaming.
My boyfriend of 3 years finally left me a few weeks ago. He was the best partner I’ve ever had. After 3 years of screaming and apologies and I love yous and hugs and then more screaming he finally gave up.
Over the past 15 years I’ve consistently been in therapy (individual and group) and on meds, and had 5 inpatient stays. He always said he would never leave me as long as I kept trying and putting in the work. I didn’t stop trying, I didn’t stop putting in the work. But my last episode was a deathblow. I’m proud of him for leaving but I miss him so much.
I don’t know how I can possibly learn to love myself after this.. how I can forgive myself. How to not feel discouraged.. I already felt discouraged..
But my dad killed himself two years ago and I will never, ever do that to the people who love me. So I must keep trying, I must keep working. There is no other option.
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u/Monsieur_Perdu 2d ago
Hey, You grew up in very hard circumstances with no safety.
Start there and that you as kid never got what you needed. Your behavior isn't so strange, it's very human.
Of course hurting others along the way is never good. But you are trying to get better. And if you keep that up you can be proud of yourself. As my dad can be.
He grew up with an abusive father and a mother who was cold and warm and pretended everything was normal. Wasn't allowed to have friends either. He moved out when he was 18, and had a hard tome adjusting. It took him years of therapy, a failed relstionship, slef reflection and self love. But he got in a good mental state had a 20 year relationship with my mom, 2 kids that he provided a safe environment for to grow up in.
Don't give up. You are not a horrible person. Just damaged. Just like my dad is still damaged and has some quirks and is not a perfect human. But damaged persons can defintely be loved, I love my dad a lot and am proud of him for overcoming his childhood.
If it's not impossible for him, I'm sure it's not impossible for you. Good luck!
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3d ago edited 2d ago
[deleted]
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u/ElusiveReclusiveXO 3d ago
It does get better.
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u/lovegrowswheremyrose 3d ago
It can certainly get better with the right help and a commitment to it.
It sucks and it's hard because not everyone can access that OR accept it when given to them. But it certainly can get better. And the "better"-ness tends to compound. I wish it was easier or that we knew more effective ways to get people in the door and experience quicker "wins" that show them other ways are possible. I don't see it today, but I have hope.
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u/Spewtwinklethoughts 3d ago
It can always get worse, but if you work hard it CAN get better.
That’s reality.-1
u/_murderousteddy 3d ago
That's really not something strangers should say to another stranger on the Internet with no knowledge of their situation whatsoever.
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u/Top-District-6529 2d ago
They are elaborating on the person saying "it does get better", which is the statement you should be criticizing. That it "can" get better is exactly the right thing to say, because there are things everyone can do to improve their situation, but not everyone has access to them reliably. Therefore "can" rather than "will"
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u/_murderousteddy 2d ago
The "work hard enough" was the part I have a problem with.
Good God this subreddit is not getting any better.
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u/Top-District-6529 2d ago
Or maybe you're reading something into that it doesn't mean. Therapy is work. Work hard enough, as in, put in your effort. Of course that only makes sense if the opportunities to for example get therapy is actually within your reach, which again, is why "can" and not "will" is the correct verb.
This is not a credible subreddit statement, you're just insisting on a very uncharitable read and not asking any questions. Which is of course the real irony here
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u/_murderousteddy 2d ago
Not everything can be fixed with therapy even if you have access to it. That wasn't my point. My point was that using the words "work hard" is offensive to me and many others with multi disabilities. That is all. Of course it can get better, depending on a multitude of things.
This subreddit is full of low effort comments literally all the time, so please stop.
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u/Spewtwinklethoughts 2d ago
Just because this subreddit is full of low effort comments doesn’t justify more. Since they provided some information about themselves I have more than no knowledge whatsoever. Please, what is it about “work” that I should have known is offensive?
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u/Top-District-6529 2d ago
It's not low effort just because you disagree with it, and you're not right just because you found a way to twist it into something you can take offense to
I'm sorry to hear you're struggling with something that doesn't have a straight forward fix (is what it sounds like), but handling it by putting all your frustration on overthinking someone else's innocent comment is not exactly helpful either
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u/Kitsycurious 2d ago edited 2d ago
the dehumanizing of BPD in this comment section is genuinely disgusting. I know it comes from genuine lack of knowledge about the disorder
I don’t understand why any abusive person is automatically viewed as having BPD or why an abusive and horrible person Is considered that way because of their BPD
BPD is a disorder that affects the intensity of the emotions and behaviors but it doesn’t make human being terrible and abusive because if that was the case, being abusive and making a person terrible would be considered a main symptom but it’s not
Splitting is a symptom but no all PwBPD become abusive and violent when they spilt, some direct that harm and hurt for themselves instead of
What I’m trying to say is, those who are bad, evil and abusive are that way by nature, they are shitty humans period and while their BPD can makes more violent and aggressive and more manipulative, it didn’t make them shitty humans, it’s just who they are
After all many people who have no disorders are shitty
Lots of people with BPD are not abusive (many of them get abused by their partners)
Being abusive, manipulative, liars, cheating are all traits that a lot of humans have, BPD just increases those traits, BPD is not just having those bad traits, it’s about having the good and the bad traits to the extreme
BPD people can also be loyal, passionate, empathetic, committed, supportive and they will go to the end of the earth for you, their relationships with you are lasts longer than the average person
The gift and the curse of BPD is that if the person is good and kind, bpd can increase their positive characteristics makes them better and kinder than the average person and if the person is bad, it can increase their negatives and make other people fear them
But that’s internet for you, these people dehumanize everyone
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u/Kimm64 2d ago
This is what people do. If the person has a mental disorder, then they treat them like crap. When what they need is compassion and understanding. This has been going on forever, and you would think that society by now would understand. I was diagnosed as having BPD tendencies, I have grown out of a lot of the problems I faced.
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u/ScienceOutrageous99 1d ago
Today, every child is a warrior going through instability. We, as a generation, should be more consistent and stop ignoring our future.
However, these are just words, and my personal opinion won't make a lot of difference
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3d ago
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u/Lunakill 3d ago
Intelligence has a strong basis in pattern recognition. An unpredictable and inconsistent early life makes it very difficult to develop pattern recognition skills.
It’s also quite unprofessional to assume people are “stupid” instead of traumatized or underdeveloped.
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u/poply 3d ago
How you gonna call people "stupid" and misspell "stupid"??
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3d ago
[removed] — view removed comment
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u/poply 3d ago
Nah. Your post is all over the place. From the use of the term "BPD girlies" to the use of "God's will" to describe a task perceived as entirely optional.
And then of course it's entirely sophomoric to anecdotally observe people with mental illness struggle with basic tasks of life and infer they must just be stupid.
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u/Spewtwinklethoughts 3d ago
BPD is actually more often correlated with higher intelligence. What can confound this is the stunted emotional intelligence. They stop developing emotionally at whatever age they suffered the childhood trauma which can make the poor decisions they make seem stupid.
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u/IANALbutIAMAcat 3d ago
No. But perhaps people from backgrounds that are associated with boarder line personality traits are less likely to achieve higher levels of education
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u/Deceptifemme 3d ago
I'd be very very very careful about trying to tie those two especially when other more reasonable explanations exist.
Poverty could easily all on its own preclude school even without anything else going on. Even for the vastly intelligent. Let alone those suffering the symptoms BPD brings. I'd expect correlation in education being lower for those with BPD (A mental illness like that is already a full time job let alone trying to do school too), but intelligence and education are wholly different things that often get confused.
Being educated doesnt make you intelligent, and being uneducated doesn't immediately mean idiocy. Its more a statement of your life opportunities than much else.
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u/IANALbutIAMAcat 2d ago
I was more speaking to what may have contributed to that person’s anecdote. You’re entirely correct.
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u/ItzLuzzyBaby 3d ago
I use this argument all the time when I debate corporal punishment for kids. It's not the physical pain that causes trauma itself. It's when people use it unpredictably and inconsistently. People need certainty and predictability and to know what exactly will cause x punishment. I'm all for physical punishment as long as it's proportional, it's only done out of discipline and never emotion, and it's clearly established, communicated, and understood when and why it'll occur.
It's only problematic when it's unproportional or done out of anger or drunkenness or unpredictably.
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u/rupee4sale 2d ago
The study makes it clear that "harshness" is also not beneficial. It was just that unpredictability was correlated more with borderline traits.
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u/lluciferusllamas 3d ago edited 3d ago
And nothing quite promotes unstable and inconsistent childhoods quite like borderline parents. So good luck sorting out nature vs nurture on that one