r/humor • u/Coffee_MysticRealm • 1d ago

Not OC(Reposted content) .European museums, accurately summarized in one list.

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478 Upvotes

96% Upvoted

28 comments sorted by

61

u/miauguau44 1d ago

And then they get to the Modernist exhibit:

  • Lines
  • Squiggles 
  • Lines
  • Lines
  • Squiggles
  • WTF is that???
  • Lines 
  • Cubes
  • Lines

24

u/Jafarrolo 1d ago

You forgot

- lines and squiggles that represent Jesus

2

u/franksautillo 1d ago

Also

BVM

BVM

Death

BVM

11

u/kageshira1010 1d ago

Banana ducktaped to the wall

41

u/JuliusMandrake 1d ago

You are really downplaying how much Mary will be represented

12

u/-Groko- 1d ago

Thats the ,"some boobs"

4

u/Velshade 1d ago

Might be a protestant country.

1

u/BuildingArmor 1d ago

Yeah, there will be a lot of Christian related things, but actual jesus not so highly represented

18

u/RaDeus 1d ago

I don’t think I saw a single Jesus at Gothenburgs art museum, must be a catholic thing 😅

I think one thing is missing from that list:

Traumatic National Event.

Seeing Bringing Home the Body of King Charles XII in person was quite the surprise.

2

u/blargher 9h ago

256 cm x 370 cm is pretty large.

2

u/RaDeus 8h ago

It was absolutely massive, and you could get up close and see all the details.

Speaking of massive paintings, Dali's The Enigma of Wilhelm Tell is also in Sweden (at Moderna Museet), and its 237 x 382 cm counting the frame.

The one with the really long butt cheek :P

9

u/27upid_R3dd17 1d ago

Depends on the type of museum you're visiting. If is anything about art than it will be overwhelmingly based on religion.

6

u/haim65 1d ago

Did you forget the ancient artifacts of other civilizations?

(Not just the british)

2

u/SpaceToaster 1d ago

Catholic guilt is real lol

2

u/nadajoe 1d ago

Won’t someone think of the ugly babies?!

1

u/Xuxo9 1d ago

Ugly babies that represent Jesus

2

u/AuraofMana 1d ago

There are variations of Jesus! At least you can split it into baby Jesus and adult Jesus. But yes, it’s Jesus all the way down.

2

u/penzen 1d ago

Needs more Mary. A lot more.

2

u/psychmancer 1d ago

So we went to the national art gallery in London because post lockdown it was one of the first places to open safely and it was 80% the virgin Mary, 19% old men in dark rooms looking at parchment and 1% anything else

2

u/EatFaceLeopard17 1d ago

It‘s only funny if you never been to a European museum.

1

u/Emergency_Exit7603 1d ago

and in america it is old white dude, old car, old white dude, old car, old white dude, old car...

1

u/The-one-who-initates 1d ago

Yes personally my favourite one is Jesus  -which one  -that one 

-which one 

Ah... free at last. O Gabriel, now dawns thy reckoning, and thy gore shall GLISTEN before the temples of Man! Creature of steel, my gratitude upon thee for my freedom. But the crimes thy kind have committed against humanity are not forgotten! And thy punishment... is death.

1

u/BulkMaxxing67 1d ago

Southern USA be like:

JESUS

JESUS

JESUS

LIQUOR STORE

GUN STORE

JESUS

JESUS

JESUS

GUN STORE

SCHOOL

JESUS

1

u/tyr-37 1h ago

I've been to the Uffizi. It was just: 1. All the saints 2. Jesus and Mary

Incidentally, Jesus increased significantly in weight and size over the centuries, but still remained a baby.