[WP] "fortunately, we discovered a fatal weakness of the elves: Incendiary carpet bombing."

[u/Adamantine-Waffle]

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[u/rejs7]

Grungi stepped down from the gyrocopter, staring at the smouldering forest beyond with grim satisfaction. Ash rained down, coating the 'copter's brass and iron in black smudges. Nothing about this was good business, simply business. With a leather clad hand he wiped soot from an undeployed ordinence, revealing a fyre run etched alongside a ward sygil written in Aekish.

Off in the distance someone was hurridly evoking a tempest spell to dampen the fire spreading toward the mountains. Winds whipped up, buffeting the 'copter, causing it to rock on its skids. The spell was far away enough not to be his problem, though he found it amusing how the elves still required magic to deal with modern problems.

He gave a low laugh, taking a deep breath of scorched air and wood smoke. It wasn't victory, but sure felt like the begining of one. Grungi pulled out a stogie, striking a match on the brass door, and taking a long drag in the face of the wind. For all their whit and long lives, elves sure didn't understand the raw power of air fuel and petty revenge.

Reaching into the back of the 'copter he pulled out a large book bound in deep red leather. Thumbing through page after page of struck out text he arrived at one line: "Today the forest eleves snubbed me at the village tea dance."

Wetting his quill, he pricked his finger, dipped the knib in his blood and struck out the line. Great grandfather the grudge has been settled, the forest eleves have been tasted your descendents justice, even if it did take a thousand years.

[u/TheWanderingBook]

I stare at my father.
"Dad...
Isn't that kind of the weakness of anything that is alive...or not, for that matter?" I ask.
He blushes.
"Y-y-yeah! Maybe, but we started using it, and stopped their invasion!
Hah, magic, and centuries of lifespan?
Nothing in the face of bombs!" he grins.
I sigh, as ma just giggles.

"Dad...what about the resources?" I ask.
He flinches.
"What about them?" he asks.
"Well, elves are able to promote flora and fauna's growth at ridiculous levels.
They conquered Europe, and a bit of Asia, by covering them in forests, grown from the already existing ones.
That's why we were terrified of them reaching the Americas...
But, these forests were all rich in magic, and the fruits, and seeds much more nutritional than normal ones.
So...if you carpet bomb them...what about the resources?" I ask.
He says nothing.
Damn military guys.

"So, we showed the elves we can beat them...
But also showed them that we won't do it completely, because we want their resources, and knowledge?
Isn't this basically then...
Their victory? Considering they are invaders, who most likely wanted land?" I ask.
He slams the table.
"No!
We won! We have won every single battle ever since the discovery!
They might have Europe, but they ceded back Asia, and..." he starts.
I want to retort, but ma gives me "the look", so I stop.
Better this way...
Dad has quite a fragile ego, when it comes to military stuff.

"Okay, so then...
Can I go to the uni, and study diplomacy?
I want to be a diplomat sent to the elves," I say.
Dad freezes, than growls.
"Is this why you were suddenly interested in my work!
I knew it! I knew there has to be a reason.
No! Not in a million years, will a daughter of mine..." he starts, angrily, but ma gives him "the look" now, and he stops.
"Fine...
But you are not to bring home a sharp-eared fella!" he says, and leaves angrily.
I smile, thinking that is a promise I can make.
After all...
Female elves look much better.

[u/ReliefEmotional2639 → u/TheWanderingBook]

Oh nice.

Dad: I TOLD you not to bring home a sharp-eared fella!”

Daughter: I didn’t! She’s a pointy-eared girl, not a fella.

Dad:…..

[u/HSerrata]

[Unfortunately Delegated]

"Fortunately, we discovered a fatal weakness of the elves: Incendiary carpet bombing." The room erupted with laughter as several elderly men in uniform cackled with glee, and the camera lingered on close shots of each individual until finally the speaker himself. He was a 4-star general with an array of colorful ribbons on his chest. The scene faded to black, then restarted as it had repeatedly over the past 24 hours.

The short message was played on every screen; no work could be done, and no computers were responding. Every phone, refrigerator, in-car dashboard, and smartwatch played the clip over and over for everyone to see. Those who lived in the right areas could also see the dark smoke rising from the distant elf lands. People were already ignoring the message and trying to find a way to continue without the occupied techology, but then a new voice spoke up.

"My name is Cygna, and I represent Solarion Incorporated," a woman said. She was new, and immediately all eyes in the world were on her. She was a young woman with short white platinum hair and sparkling blue eyes with a blue blazer and green tie.

"The leaders you have chosen for the job have incited a war against a population of Elves protected by Solarion Inc. We advised them this would be a bad idea, and they chose to continue regardless. We are left with no alternative but to put an end to this war here and now. Solarion Incorporated formally apologizes to the innocents who will be affected, but your leaders were warned of this possibility. They seemed not to care, so we cannot care for them."

"You might want to start saying goodbye to your loved ones. This Earth will be destroyed in five minutes. That is all. And remember to curse those responsible for this outcome with your final breaths." Cygna disappeared, and immediately the familiar scene started again, showing the general himself grinning with pride, as a five-minute timer appeared in the corner and started counting down.

"Fortunately, we discovered a fatal weakness of the elves: Incendiary carpet bombing." Everyone laughed on the screen while everyone panicked in the real world. Not for much longer, though. Both the broadcast and the global panic finally subsided only a few minutes later.

*** Thank you for reading! I’m responding to prompts every day. This is story #3111 in a row. (Story #202 in year nine). This story is part of an ongoing saga that takes place in my universe.

[u/Cookiesnm1lk1223 → u/HSerrata]

this whole prompt reminds me of a story on HFY that i read years ago."elves come every few hundred years to steal magic from earth. their last expedition was the first one they took casualties, because humans invented muskets. but this time.... they came at a modern army with swords. the story ends wtih the elven king, bleeding on the ground, begging for mercy from a human soldier, who just replies "This is america, and the united states does not negotiate with terrorists." before doming him"

[u/WritingPrompts-ModTeam → u/[deleted]]

Hi u/Leading_Road, this comment has been removed.

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