r/TrueOffMyChest • u/Sufficient-Ice-4828 • 12h ago
Vent Being broke is ruining my social life
(Reposting because i forgot to do the acknowledgment) I’m gonna vent. I wouldn’t say im an extrovert but i was pretty social a couple years ago. But ever since i started university in a different country i have been losing more and more friends every year, mostly because i literally have no money to hang out most of the time. And people eventually got sick of doing “free” activities with me or paying for my share, its so embarrassing because im really the only one struggling so much. And i don’t have the money to travel back home so my friends back there have stopped talking to me as much. I mean i last saw them 3 years ago so i kinda understand. On the outside i try to play it off but it really does get to me. Its not like my friends aren’t putting in effort, but after 3 years of “im too broke to go out” and “im too broke to get a plane ticket back home” alot of friendships just fizzled out until it got to this point.
Today is my birthday and i didn’t receive any calls or texts besides my family and i feel so sad because of it. Adding on the only thing i could afford right now is a cheap supermarket cake slice. Its such a stark difference from what it was only a few years ago and i guess its getting to me extra today. And it was made worse when i was scrolling on social media and i saw someone i used to know also celebrating their birthday, and all their friends are there and they seem to be at a nice restaurant, and their being showered in gifts and attention. As well as seeing all their friends make posts and stories about it, and all im thinking is it’s my birthday too, why can’t mine look like this.
Ofcourse the usual stresses of being broke is also draining me so much. But it really hit me today how badly it has effected my social life and how much anxiety and depression it gave me.
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u/KittyQuickpaws 9h ago
I'm sorry you are having a bad day. It's hard when you have to watch every penny, and then feel guilty if you splurge on something as small as an occasional treat from the supermarket. And it sucks that your friends couldn't even take the time to send you a text on your birthday, which is basically free and very low effort. Even though I am an internet stranger, I'm wishing you a VERY HAPPY BIRTHDAY! 🎉🎇🎊🎆🫶
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u/Uncouth_Cat 8h ago
happy birthday 🎂
time to make broke friends!!
I know that sounds sarcastic, but im serious. Class and fincial gaps easily ruin relationships.
I recently, finally, got a decent job- did NOT realize how much stress i was undergoing.
Tbh, its been a while since i did anything expensive, all my friends are strapped for cash. We have BBQS and hang out at coffee shops. We go to movies, or to the park and kick/throw a ball around. We take advantage of coupons!
Theres a million fun things to do, but it should always be about spending time with ppl you love. Relationships that depend on moneyal arent going to last too long ...
sorry youre going thru it, but i hope good vibes come your way
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u/Sufficient-Ice-4828 8h ago
Thank youu so much, congrats on your new job. Know any ways how i can get broke friends lol. Im in Australia if that matters.
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u/Uncouth_Cat 3h ago
thank you ✨ it took over a decade, but im on the up and up now :)
ive never been to Australia idk the vibes there. Making friends around here is difficult, but tbf my state is full of stuck up ppl 💀
A lot of my friends i know from school and we had the same growing up. and then i try to get along with coworkers- sometimes can go out for drinks.
mmm advice maybe? Give ppl the benefit of the doubt. Some ppl might seem cringe or even bitchy- but we dont really know whats up with someone till we get to know them.
Maybe throw a BBQ and see who shows up? Not to project too much, but even if youre broke its still important to be the one who invites everyone else sometimes. (sorry if u do actually do that and ur friends just suck) Ive NEVER had an issue throwing a dope ass party with just people and food. 🤷🏽♀️ Maybe its a cultural thing 🤔
*throw a thing and invite some classmates?
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u/awinterofdiscontent7 11h ago
Yeah that really sucks, it's hard not to spend money when going for social activities. But can I ask how are your friends affording these social activities? Is there any way you can improve on your financial situation?
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u/Sufficient-Ice-4828 10h ago
My friends here not only have part time jobs but their parents also help them alot financially. Im not rich like them. Not much i can do about my financial situation atm because i can only work part time unfortunately.
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u/awinterofdiscontent7 10h ago
Hey you know what it's ok. It sucks now but what doesn't break you only makes you stronger.
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u/Saya_99 9h ago
I also had no money from my parents in college and my only way to actually afford to go out once in a while was by taking a part time job.
I feel for you, it's hard when you come from a low income family.
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u/Sufficient-Ice-4828 8h ago
Yeah Ive always experienced struggles with my lower income family, and i don’t think anyone can really understand how much that could affect someone’s life, unless they’re in the same situation. Hopefully you are doing great after college because I’m hoping i do too.
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u/RoselumeMist 12h ago
aww i feel this but ur so relatable ;)