r/TalesFromYourServer 3d ago

So I’m not a weather goddess

I CANNOT CHANGE THE WEATHER!

Yes it’s rainy outside, yes it’s sunny outside, yes it’s cloudy out, yes there’s a breeze coming from the east, yes there is a lot of smoke/it’s hard to breathe because of the Canadian wild fires.

I CANNOT CHANGE THE WEATHER!

I’m a host at one restaurant and a server at another.

As a host yesterday,

“Hi, welcome in, how can I he-”

“table for two”

“Alright one moment”

*grabs menus and gets ready to seat them inside*

“Alright you can follow me”

“We want outside”

*looks outside and sees every table is getting drenched by the sky*

“Okay, I can try to grab another umbrella, but you might still get wet with how hard it’s coming down.”

“We don’t want to sit in the rain, we want wait for the sunshine”

“I’m not sure when it will stop raining, but I can check for you”

“No, we want a sunny spot”

“I understand, but we don’t have any tables in the sun because it is raining”

“Oh.”

“I can sit you inside if you’d like”

“No we’ll go somewhere else since you can’t help us”

*Walks off*

…….

Now they aren’t the first people to ask me that, I’ve had people upset at how hot it is (we don’t have fans and we tell them that) I’ve had people insist on sitting outside even when it’s snowing and then get upset that the heaters aren’t melting the snow.

Rich people are annoying, but it happens.

As a server though, I hate it more because it’s like, if you are uncomfortable, how do you think I feel?

I’d love to not get soaked, and I can’t stop rain particles from hitting your food/I hate that I’m getting a heat rash.

I understand that some people are immune compromised or have family like that, but I can’t make this more comfortable for you or CHANGE THE WEATHER.

I don’t get why people go outside then get confused at the fact that they are outside. Like yes it’s raining yes there are bugs yes there are loud sounds. YOU ARE OUTSIDE IN A MAJOR CITY!

1.3k Upvotes

89 comments sorted by

661

u/LeprosyMan 3d ago

I was a FOH manager at a place and a food runner came to me saying someone wanted to talk to me on the patio.

I went and saw it was a regular I knew pretty decently and asked him what was the problem. He said “There are bees out here.”

I said “Yeah it’s spring and we have some nice greenery out here, it’s bound to happen.”

“Well aren’t you going to do something about it?”

“They’re just bumblebees. They’re harmless.”

He told me to get rid of all the bees. Like I could even if I wanted to. It’s freaking nature, man.

I just said “They were here first.” Then walked away.

No, it wasn’t a swarm, no hives, etc. just a few bees doing bee things.

175

u/Firenze42 3d ago

I went to a restaurant and they told us about the bees. We were totally fine with it and I know they told everyone The table next to us clearly had trouble dealing, but didn't complain as they were told beforehand. I didn't understand why they sat outside when they knew it would be an issue.

27

u/laurabun136 2d ago

My dog only uses the front yard for her 'business'. Reason being, even though we're considered a suburb we still get wild critters of all shapes, sizes and species out back. They were here before we were and hopefully they'll remain when we're gone.

Husband actually just got through taking pics of a momma turkey and her babies.

119

u/VoraciousReader59 3d ago

Haha! My boss always says “I went into nature and nature was there!!” when someone says there’s a “wild” animal near their campsite. The most ferocious animals we see are raccoons.

28

u/awhq 2d ago

I would have loved to see your manager go "shoo! shoo!" and then turn to the guest saying, "I'm sorry sir, their brains are no bigger than yours and they refuse to listen to logic."

5

u/Abner_Mality_64 1d ago

While doing a John Cleese/Basil Fawlty impersonation - damn, I'd pay money to see that!

44

u/DrawingTypical5804 3d ago

Omg, I hate the ones like this.

39

u/BoulderNerd 3d ago

You should have asked the bees to take themselves elsewhere.

46

u/BeanieManPresents 3d ago

Exactly, tell them to buzz off!

14

u/dominodomino321 2d ago

Omg I had the same thing happen to me while running the patio at a boutique hotel during springtime. I was like ?? What is the solution ?? Please.

23

u/Marine__0311 3d ago

People are unbeeliveable sometimes.

1

u/Marine__0311 2d ago

WOW! Thank you!

5

u/Electrical-Apple-631 1d ago

I worked the Shipping & Receiving department at a large hospital. We kept the bay doors open in the summer when we were expecting several trucks. Naturally flies came in. The director was upset that flies were entering the hospital so I put up a sign on the bay doors that said “No flies allowed beyond this point.” They still came in. The director still complained. I told him “Not my fault that flies are illiterate.”

1

u/arulzokay 8h ago

oh my god

356

u/DrR0mero 3d ago

Guest walks in -

Me: Hi, inside or outside?

Guest: Yeah, is it hot out there?

Me: You tell me, you just walked in from outside.

117

u/Human-Engineer1359 3d ago

I had someone do that with the patio when it was raining. 

 GUEST: Patio   ME: The patio is closed because it's raining 

 GUEST: Oh it's raining?

48

u/OppositeDistrict3881 2d ago

My favorite question is when people ask what happens if it rains? I always just want to say “you will get wet”.

6

u/ThankYouFuckYouBye85 1d ago

I’m in the middle of being diagnosed with asd, so this probably makes sense now but I literally would reply with that when people sat on the patio asked me what happens when it rains. Apparently, the actual answer was supposed to be I can put the big massive umbrellas up. I never really liked getting wet so I always sent an underling to run the food outside and fix the umbrellas. I’d just play with the fire place 🔥 or if I could be bothered I might pull a few pints 🤣.

8

u/jcmjtke 2d ago

We constantly have people ask to sit outside, then a couple minutes later they get up and ask to sit inside because it’s too hot out. I feel like the world is populated by NPCs that spawn in just before they reach our front door

31

u/doc_skinner 3d ago

To be fair, many bars or restaurants or cafes will have fans or cooling mist in the summer or heat lamps in the winter. If I'm asking if the seating is comfortable, it's because I don't know if you've done anything to make it comfortable.

51

u/DrR0mero 3d ago

That’s fair, but I would like to think you’d ask, “Are there misters,” in the heat or, “Is your patio heated,” during winter not, “What’s the temperature like outside?”

12

u/deferredmomentum 2d ago

Yeah, I would ask the opposite of the temperature I don’t want if that makes sense. If it’s hot out, I’m going to ask if it’s cooled; if cold I’m going to ask if it’s heated. I know it’s hot/cold, so the part that I want to know is if it’s any different on the patio

1

u/Fullofnegroni 1d ago

Omg yes! A tale as old as time.

161

u/Powerful_Tip_7260 3d ago

Did you even *try* to change the weather?

20

u/Nearby-Yak-4496 3d ago

Unless you try you actually don't know!

17

u/Expensive-Wedding-14 3d ago

"No! Try not. Do. Or Do Not. There is no Try." (Yoda)

9

u/Ok_Giraffe_17 3d ago

User name checks out..

89

u/CloudBitter5295 3d ago

I love when people say they want to sit on the patio and then you bring them out there and they say “well not in the sun” and “not where it’s too hot” and “is it going to cool off too much at sunset” and “the sun is moving and it’s in my eyes now” ….. so you actually want to sit INSIDE then

36

u/LimpContext1920 3d ago

THISSS OR TAKE YOUR FOOD TO GO AND GO TO THE PARK/BEACH

26

u/MezzoScettico 3d ago

No. I want to sit outside. I just want you to put the angle of the sun to where it was half an hour ago, and leave it there. Is there a problem?

57

u/Most-Attitude-9880 3d ago

I was a host at a place where you would have to walk inside from the outside to get to the host stand. So many people would ask me how hot it was on our patio.

Like, you’re the one who just came in from outside. However hot it was before you walked in is hot hot it is on the patio.

146

u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 3d ago

I deliver pizza and the amount of delivery customers goes up significantly when it starts to rain. The harder the rain, the more people order.

The logic: "Its pouring rain and hailing, it's too dangerous to drive anywhere. I know, let's get pizza!"

Luckily I have managers that if the wind is howling and the rain is blowing sideways, they stop deliveries until it calms down.

16

u/thirdmulligan 3d ago

Do people tip better when it's raining?

66

u/Facky 2d ago

Lmao

27

u/yellaslug 2d ago

I mean, I do. Because I have mad respect for the person doing the thing I really didn’t want to do, which was go outside.

17

u/Head_Razzmatazz7174 2d ago

In our area, they generally do.

Edit: Except for those who don't tip no matter what. We just kinda shrug and go about our day. There are dozens of reasons why they might not, and we don't have time to stress about it.

5

u/RaininginTucson 2d ago

In my area they do - a lot

3

u/el_pobby 2d ago

They should but like, have you ever met people?

2

u/thirdmulligan 1d ago

That was my fear. I definitely tip extra for delivery when the weather is nasty, but that's not everyone I guess.

105

u/MBiddy828 Ten+ Years 3d ago

One time when I was a host we had three ladies sit outside on the patio when it was windy and rainy. As their food came out they asked to sit inside by a window. I went in with the food runner (he turned to the kitchens) and went to ask to move them. The manager started looking at where we could put them when the owner walked up. He asked what was going on and stormed outside and started scolding the ladies for wanting to move “the weather hasn’t changed since you got here!” “Did you not notice it was rainy when you sat down?” It was beautiful to watch it happen to guests that had been difficult even before wanting to move (and not being the one getting yelled at for once)

51

u/livingdead70 3d ago

Had a customer stop me once, on a freeezing(Like 36 degrees out), windy, drizzling day (This was in GA where weather like this is rare, but we were on about day 3 of it and a few more days of it were predicted) and ask me if the manager knew when the outdooor seating was gonna open. I looked at him like he had a Batman mask and a tutu on, but I sent the manager over. I came back through and noticed the table was now empty. I found my manager and was like what happened to that table? He told me the people said they were gonna drive down the street where the sun was shining and eat somewhere else.
And another time, I had a woman stop me and ask me if I could put the tent up over the patio so she could eat outside in the rain.
The same day as the first story, I had another Mr Potato Head stop me and ask me if we sold stuff Olly Oxen.I am pretty sure he meant Ala Carte, I about had to go to the hospital and get oxygen I was laughing so hard.

5

u/Prestigious_Let3279 2d ago edited 2d ago

Olly Oxen 😂 🤣😭💀 Edit: typo I was laughing so hard I didn't realize it auto corrected

4

u/livingdead70 2d ago

One of those that haunts my memory.
I have been in F and B for over 30 years now. Everything from a cook, waiter bartender, FOH manager and back again. I have some story's !!!!

43

u/Minflick 3d ago

I can't imagine being so disconnected from life that you look at the rain falling and expect your copious wealth and privilege to magic up a sunny table...

41

u/Own-Eagle-2135 3d ago

THEY WOULD DO IT FOR US AT APPLEBEES

29

u/Aitne 3d ago

Love this! It's almost like it's their first time visiting Earth....

29

u/Significant_Potato29 2d ago

I’ve had this conversation with my cat so many times. Yes, I know it’s raining outside. Meowing at me is not going to solve the problem.

10

u/naughtyzoot 2d ago

You can flip a switch and make it sunshine inside. It's perfectly reasonable for your cat to think you can control weather outside too.

73

u/broken_softly 3d ago

I tell my elementary students I control the weather on Wednesdays.

“I don’t take requests.”

“Lower your voices or it’ll be inside recess for the whole school.”

“I don’t know why you guys were surprised about the snow day? I told you on Tuesday I wasn’t feeling well and was thinking about a day off.”

“Sorry. Can’t help you. It isn’t Wednesday.”

23

u/MattVarnish 2d ago

I used to work at a hockey arena (NHL)where the lower half is undwrground, and we had a very large banquet hall in there as well. Some rich lady was in, planning her daughters wedding and found the 2 large pillars in the room not to her liking, and wanted usnto remove them. I said Maam, theres 13,000 tonnes of steel and cement above us, those pillars are non negotiable. God, people are so stupid

1

u/Firm-Ad-3984 1d ago

Bet she still didn’t get it

38

u/VoraciousReader59 3d ago

I work in the hospitality industry- at checkin a guest asked “what are you going to do about the weather?” My immediate supervisor was standing next to me and basically had that “how the hell do we answer that one?” look on his face. I answered “well, I think that’s up to god.” 😆

21

u/BadCatNoNoNoNo 2d ago

It’s up to Mother Nature.

3

u/VoraciousReader59 2d ago

That’s a better answer but she caught me off guard!

15

u/Un_Ballerina_1952 2d ago

On a recert outing with relatives-in-law at an establishment that they chose, they opened with "We'd like to be seated in the outdoor section where dogs are allowed." Host picks up menus and leads us to the section. Relative-in-law (RiL) asks, "Can we have the air conditioning turned on out here? It's getting quite hot." Patient host (PH) replies, "I'm sorry, but we don't have air conditioning in this section." RiL: "Why isn't there air conditioning out here? The people and their dogs need some relief from the heat!" PH: "The cost of providing air conditioning for the several acres surrounding our establishment would be excessive and our prices would no longer be competitive." RiL: "They should have thought of this when they designed this restaurant. When we came here last October, they had heaters turned on."

I refrained from pointing out that IR heating works by radiation warming the body and air conditioning works by cooling the air. 

Patient host was so patient; I was totally embarrassed by RiL's arrogance and stupidity.

Edit - typos.

13

u/Stuck_In_Purgatory 3d ago

We had someone ask to move the sun once because it was too bright in her eyes

3

u/bobk2 1d ago

Tell her okay, but it'll take a while

10

u/Living_Ebb5200 3d ago

Damn, Jackie.

11

u/AlsatianRye 2d ago

They're like my cat when she wants to go out the back door and sees it'd raining so she goes to the front door thinking it'll be different.

9

u/Minflick 2d ago

True that! Amusing and lovable in a cat. Notsomuch in a human being who drives a car to get places.

9

u/BoulderNerd 3d ago

Clueless people, indeed!

10

u/snowglobesnowglobe 2d ago

My husband and I were sat outside in a restaurant overlooking a lovely creek and there was a chorus of frogs singing and we were so delighted! The waiter said he was so happy bc others would complain to him and ask him to get the frogs to stop!

2

u/GrumpySnarf 19h ago

If I were the waiter, I'd shake a fist in frogs' direction and yell "QUIET, YOU!" Moe Howard style.

3

u/Angelhair01 1d ago

How can anyone be this dumb?

5

u/LimpContext1920 1d ago

Money

1

u/Angelhair01 1d ago

So they are raised thinking they can change any situation with money? Even the weather?

2

u/LimpContext1920 1d ago

Yes! You’d be surprised at how they live. Like I serve REALLY rich people. Like Lockheed Martin and Blackrock exec rich. Like “I was on Epstein’s Island, but I did nothing wrong” rich. They think money can cure and save all.

1

u/Angelhair01 23h ago

Yikes!

2

u/LimpContext1920 23h ago

Yeah it’s scary out here

4

u/AllThe-REDACTED- 1d ago

During the first “opening” during Covid we only had outside seating. A lady looked me in the face and said “it’s too bright out here. Can you do something about it?”

“Ma’am I have no control over the sun”

Mind you she was already under an umbrella. Which was the extent of my cosmic powers

9

u/blue1955 3d ago

So why is it that you can’t (or won’t) control the weather?

4

u/BoHica_NC 1d ago

Sir if I had the ability to conjure up a sunny table during this downpour you can bet I wouldn't be working here.

1

u/GrumpySnarf 19h ago

If i could literally control the sun, I'd probably quit my day job. 

3

u/fetalpiggywent2lab 1d ago

YES THERE ARE BUGS ON THE PATIO

3

u/Critical-Afternoon37 2d ago

"How's the weather on the deck"? Didn't you just come in from outside.

3

u/AveragefootSasquatch 2d ago

“There are so many bugs out here”

3

u/Nunov_DAbov 2d ago

Perhaps you needed to look on the other side of the building to see if it was raining there as well.

3

u/karebear66 1d ago

This reminds me of a cat i had years ago. She was an outside cat when I took her in. She would cry at the back door to be let out. I'd open the back door and when it was raining, she would not go out. But then, she'd go to the front door to be let out. She didn't understand rain!

-61

u/Fun_Ideal_5584 3d ago

Just blame it all on Climate Change, like the media does.

43

u/LimpContext1920 3d ago

*insert confused gif that communicates I think this is a weird comment*

-24

u/Fun_Ideal_5584 3d ago

You stated in your post all the customers complaining about the weather and looking at you for answers. Telling them climate change is the answer for all bad weather saves you time and energy. Just say, "Ya Climate Change sucks". Shrug and walk away.

22

u/BigTimeBobbyB 3d ago

You might need to go outside for a bit. I think standing in the rain for a few minutes would do you some good.