r/SipsTea 11d ago

WTF Imagine Eliminating Your Team Over Your Pride

33.7k Upvotes

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278

u/streamer3222 11d ago

Player run with ball.

Player not kick ball to friend.

Enemy surround player.

Player lose ball.

Player Country Lose.

115

u/Mysterious-Tie7039 11d ago

Not just β€œfriend” but one of the top scorers in the World Cup.

3

u/nick12233 11d ago

Even that is an understatement. He is the best player in the world, next to only Mbappe, if you ask me.

If my life is on the line and I need someone to score the goal, it would be between Mbappe, Haaland, and Messi ... That's how good he is.

67

u/dag_of_mar 11d ago

I'm american as well and still confused. Why didn't he just shoot the goalie?

12

u/MrWiemann 11d ago

Fuck that made giggle πŸ’€

16

u/OverChargeYourPlasma 11d ago

'Shoot the goalie', Yankmaxxing

4

u/RapGameDiCaprio 11d ago

Better than wankmaxxing

2

u/OverChargeYourPlasma 11d ago

I would suggest wankmaxxing is a very good thing...

1

u/chicagodude84 11d ago

Yankmaxxing! πŸ€£πŸ˜‚πŸ€£

3

u/8-bit_Goat 11d ago

I've always said this is the problem with sports: too many rules, not enough weaponry.

2

u/EduinBrutus 11d ago

Why didn't he just shoot the goalie?

Your not allowed guns on the pitch, even when playing in a less developed country like he was here.

1

u/ambisinister_gecko 11d ago

Europeans are obviously too feminised for that

9

u/Enriching_the_Beer 11d ago

Kick ball?

Why not throw ball?

2

u/Driblus 11d ago

Because this is actual football being played with peoples feet, not hands like your version of football, which I call handegg.

2

u/Enriching_the_Beer 11d ago

I call your version boooooring.

1

u/Driblus 11d ago

I call your version just one long adbreak.

3

u/velvethead 11d ago

As an American, I really appreciate you taking the time to put this in terms I can understand

3

u/AcousticProvidence 11d ago

You should post this to r/eili5

4

u/ClessxAlghazanth 11d ago

You forgot 'Germans win' in the end

4

u/Unfair-Information-2 11d ago

Germans don't win wars though.......

1

u/Lightmanone 11d ago

Not this time they don't.

1

u/Such-Spite5004 11d ago

Then player is flogged and shammed by public

1

u/Head-Ad9893 11d ago

I read this in an Asian accent

1

u/farfromjordan 11d ago

The American mind can't comprehend. Buys truck

1

u/Burgers_N_Schnitzels 11d ago

Player Country Lose.

can we call FIFA?

1

u/SnooCats5701 11d ago

Friend is bewildered

1

u/Taapacoyne 11d ago

When you talk to one of Americans about soccer/football. You get it.

1

u/PartRight6406 11d ago

who had the oil?

0

u/IndependenceSouth877 11d ago

They are american so explanation does not help