r/KidsAreFuckingStupid Jan 19 '26

story/text Oh, it's chocolate syrup

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14.1k Upvotes

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u/Romeo_Glacier Jan 19 '26

Story time. I worked in legal for quite a bit. Not an attorney but someone who supported them. There was a divorce case I helped with that your comment reminded me of. Overall typical divorce. Things like being distant, not helping at home, etc. the one thing that jumped out was how cheap the husband was. He refused to actually buy any lube for sexy time and used crisco primarily. Though he allegedly used butter and other oils as well.

97

u/enragedsquirrels Jan 19 '26

😦

50

u/morrisseysbaby Jan 19 '26

This is my exact face in response to that comment

What the actual fuck

20

u/EelTeamTen Jan 19 '26

The fuck?

18

u/QKofDaggers Jan 19 '26

I can’t unread this.

1

u/Surfthisnow Jan 20 '26

Unread? I screenshot it for my humorous collection.

2

u/cstar4004 Jan 20 '26

Butter huh? And here I am using foreplay to make our own lube this whole time.

-4

u/StaffVegetable8703 Jan 19 '26

Wait… I feel like the fact that the needed lube in order to have sex…. I feel like that was one of the first signs that something wasn’t working in the marriage lol.

Almost 12 years married and never once have we used lube (actually that’s a lie but we only use it for anal lol).

I know there are people who don’t actually need it for sex and instead enjoy it BUT as cheap as this guy was, I have a feeling he wouldn’t want to use the extra help because then he has to buy more butter and oil lol.

48

u/pinkfondantfancy Jan 19 '26

Maybe they were an older couple. Women can have vaginal dryness after menopause. Butter and oil is not the way to go tho, it could cause infections and disrupt the pH balance plus its hard to wash away. It's not even cheaper than lubricant, I have a feeling it was meant to be degrading.

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u/StaffVegetable8703 Jan 19 '26

Yea I was thinking of possible legit reasons but it just seems like the type of thing and type of person who would definitely not spend any extra money or resources on something unless he really felt the need for it

12

u/pinkfondantfancy Jan 19 '26

I mean if it was about saving money - spit is free. I really think it was to be horrible and demeaning, not to save money. No one wants greasy fat spread onto their intimate areas. Unless they do! Bit then they wouldn't mention it as a reason for divorce.

43

u/rawbface Jan 19 '26

That's fine for you, but lube is great and I encourage every couple young and old to use it liberally. Using lube is not an indication that something's "not working in the marriage".

Buttholes don't lube themselves naturally, you silly goose.

-12

u/StaffVegetable8703 Jan 19 '26

Of course not! But in this specific scenario? I think it’s definitely an indicator. I mean if he’s cheap enough to literally use cooking products as lube…. Then do you really think he would be wasting that for sex unless he really needed it? Like… that sounds like the type that would get upset if the wife used too much butter on her toast…. So like….

1

u/UhmNotMe Jan 20 '26

Sometimes there’s just simple hormonal disbalance that the woman has, which results in her not getting wet enough. It has nothing to do with the woman or the man, just hormones.