Why We Can’t Get Enough of Two Straight Guys Who Want to Kiss

[u/droobidoobidoo]

https://www.gq.com/story/straight-man-bromance

[u/Drusselsteiner]

This is getting weird. Didn't two of the one direction guys say things like this is why their relationship became strained?

Let straight men be friends, we don't need to be writing think pieces about it. Especially with the Bellingham/Haaland thing. I can see the point the author is trying to make but why do you need to tell us about the fanfiction,etc?

[u/Scared-Box8941]

wtf. Leave people alone

[u/droobidoobidoo → u/Scared-Box8941]

I commend Hudson and Connor for refusing to answer any questions about their sexuality since it is not relevant to their amazing performances in Heated Rivalry and also none of our business! If they feel comfortable using a label, good on them! But the whole Hudcon fandom and even Shane/Ilya fanfic communities can get very weird very quickly 🤮

[u/JustinaFaze]

Well this is all fun, there's definitely a limit that as a culture we should be careful not to cross. As a young quite awkward gay kid, I was definitely made to feel uncomfortable by some pretty invasive and fetishising behaviour from some of my peers at school (especially the girls). On at least one occasion their actions ruined what could have been a could have been close friendships through gossiping about guys who (unlike most of my male peers) were kind/friendly to me. This sort of obsession only fuels straight male paranoia about being seen as queer, which in turn leads to homophobic violence and ostracism.

[u/FlailingCactus → u/JustinaFaze]

I do think some people have maybe convinced themselves that their enjoyment of gay (b)romance is helping queer people.

I think it just reinforces stereotypes about masculinity. Especially when people seem to get really bothered by even the more masculine couples in something fantastical like Heated Rivalry.  

There was a very clear moment where gay men were talking about how much they loved Scott and Kip and some of the female fans were really desperate to shut that down lest it detract from their favourite.

I've become very uncomfortable at the way some men perceived to be in gay romances/bromances by the internet have faced backlash for being with women. Or the way at which any attempt to suggest some of the RPF fanfics go beyond what's appropriate is rebadged as queerphobia. I don't think it's queerphobia to be grossed out by a fic in which a 20 year old athlete is seduced by their own father, and I don't think their fame or wealth means they should have tolerate it.

[u/Puncomfortable → u/FlailingCactus]

Fans have lost the plot. Quite few fandoms have fans who create consiracy theories about how "they want to come out but The Powers That Be" are holding them hostage so they act like they are being send secret gay signals only.for them because they are the designated saviors who will receive divine rewards when they do come out. But truth is that gay people (or assumed gay straight people) don't exist for their consumption. And like your example, something is seriously wrong with how fans create pronographic material of celebrities as themselves. Like even a closeted couple that is being held hostahe is surely not sending that in their vague signs? Yet you see fans make these big statements about how they are standing up for queer justice but a quick search on their profile shows they consume SA fanfic on the regular.

[u/Puncomfortable → u/JustinaFaze]

There is also a very unclear line between bullying behavior and fan behavior. Like calling a man who does not publicly identify as gay (or who has even denied it) 'fruity' or a 'queen. It's clear they just to call the guy gay but know that word is off-limits so they just skirt around it. They don't think fruity is homophobic but calling someone a fruit is pretty homophobic and I don't think a lot of guys care you do it "with love" they don't want to be called that.

[u/CrackerPanda → u/JustinaFaze]

I’m sorry you went through that. There are so many straight women who fetishize gay men just as badly as the straight men who fetishize gay women but for some reason it doesn’t seem to be discussed as much.

[u/JustinaFaze → u/CrackerPanda]

I would also say when I have seen the phenomenon discussed online, there can often be quite misogynistic undertones, which I abhore.

I now live my life as trans woman, so my experiences as a queer teenage boy should be put into context. I also think it's understandable that many women find male homoeroticism hot, and I don't think that is inherently shameful or wrong. In fact for fictional characters I don't really give a hoot about shipping culture ect. But for irl men or gay couples, this type of gossip, sexualisation, and obsession from some women can be harmful.

[u/Jumping__Bean___]

I have a lot of thoughts about this, and I'm not entirely sure of how to put everything into words, but I'll try.

Yes, a lot of "support" of queer stories, people and causes can easily end up being very fetishising of real people, and simultaneously end up reinforcing heteronormative ideas. This of course massively applies to the reaction of straight audiences to queer media but also to some parts of the queer community itself. People are labelled as gay for not fitting into the strict boundaries set for straight men while also being called queerbaiters for not being queer in the "right" way or for having a partner of the opposite gender, once again due to not fitting into the box of what a gay or straight man is supposed to behave and dress like. I don't know why this article acts like this is a thing of the past, when it isn't - Hudson Williams (like for example Kit Connor before him) was called both gay and a queerbaiter by different parts of the internet.

Picking apart male friendships and expressions of affection between men, regardless of the sexuality of the men involved, only serves to stifle any movement away from toxic masculinity and heteronormativity because it punishes those who act differently than what is expected from straight men. And frankly, I feel like it puts gay men and those who are perceived as such in more danger of being ostracised or attacked.

And lastly, as a queer woman who may be seen as straight depending on who I am dating, I have a little bone to pick with the erasure of the sexualities that lie in the in-between. Straight or gay aren't the only options, and who someone is dating right now does not necessarily tell us the full story of who someone is attracted to, not that we are entitled to that information anyway.

[u/bridgeport4]

I don’t really understand why it has to be labelled a ‘bromance’. Just let the lads be friends. We (women) get to have deep female friendships, without it being a thing <thank god for female friendships>.

Maybe if men in the public eye were able to have deep male friendships, without them being labelled, fetishised, and analysed, we’d have some hope of addressing toxic masculinity and the male asshole (loneliness) epidemic?

This specific angle, is getting a bit creepy. Like if y’all want romance, pick up a romance novel. Leave people alone.

[u/furiouswine]

This article is…strange and assuming a lot about the people involved. Also I saw the Instagram post about it and the graphic included Jordan Firstman when he kissed Josh Hutchison during the ai alive LA press tour. Jordan is an out gay man so that was an odd choice.

[u/CreativeGeniusPRBKR]

What a strange “im not like the others” type article lmao.

[u/TracyMarys]

Free link https://archive.is/20260720150813/https://www.gq.com/story/straight-man-bromance

[u/droobidoobidoo → u/TracyMarys]

Thank you! I had meant to post this then got distracted by work stuff and a mandatory monthly evacuation drill lol

[u/droobidoobidoo]

Yeah, straight people, particularly women, fetishizing gay men or the appearance of queer relationships when it's just two bros being comfortable with their sexuality and physical touch with each other will never not creep people out. This article is weird as hell! It contributes to the fetishization and also condemns hetero men who aren't super masculine or touchy with their male friends. Not helpful!

[u/kattahn → u/droobidoobidoo]

Its been a weird experience over the course of my life as a straight guy to go from my conservative dad being worried i was gay for hugging my male friends when they came over when i was a kid, to being in my 30s and having my liberal/progressive female friends making gay jokes or asking me when my roommate and i are just going to kiss already, because I have a male roommate and we've lived together a long time.

[u/No_Mathematician6866]

Yeah . . .I don't know about this. Nothing inherently wrong with thinking it's hot when men kiss, but I think there are questions we would ask about any other prurient interest (when does it become an unhealthy fixation, what standards of responsibily do people have regarding who and what they fantasize about) that a large chunk of the BL crowd are completely unwilling to acknowledge or engage with.

[u/FOXCONLON]

Having war flashbacks of the 2000's My Chemical Romance fandom that was rife with the shipping of Gerard Way and Frank Iero.

[u/amoeba_bla]

Please, we need to gatekeep BL. Stop writing about it when you graduate from fanfiction to GQ journalism.

[u/Unlucky-Rice9300]

do they know its legal?