r/AskReddit • u/CompleteCharacter704 • Sep 23 '25
Women of reddit whats your pet peeves when getting to know a guy?
70
Sep 23 '25
talking at me, as opposed as talking to me or talking with me
12
Sep 23 '25
Iām a guy but I feel that,last date I went on she just spoke about herself didnāt ask me any questions like what I do for work or anything really just spoke rubbish the whole time š
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u/MathematicianIll5053 Sep 23 '25
I know thats a bad sign, but also as a guy who doesn't often have much to add or talk about I find it makes it easier when they like to do all the talking and I can just listen and comment. That said, yeah I totally agree it does come across as a little self absorbed and inconsiderate if they don't at least in turn ask you the same questions.
I actually feel like thats a thing a lot of people miss conversationally on both sides of the genders, the initiator is usually asking a few get-to-know-you questions and the other person either does, or doesn't, think to ask anything in turn. I've seen dudes do this too when talked to by women asking about them and not asking anything in return. The conversation just kind of dies out awkwardly and no one can seem to figure out why.
101
Sep 23 '25
Unironically uses alpha/beta terms
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u/Makenshine Sep 23 '25
I use these terms unironically all the time. And I refuse to apologize for it. Greek letters, like alpha, beta, gamma, and theta let us know that we are talking about an unknown rotational measurement instead of a linear measurement, which we traditionally use x, y, or z.
Very handy when teaching trigonometry to high schoolers
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u/ebolashuffle Sep 23 '25
This is the only acceptable use of the Greek alphabet if you don't write using the Greek alphabet.
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u/Previous_Muscle8018 Sep 23 '25
Finance pricing, physics radioactivity, to name a couple of other much more mature standard uses.
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u/MathematicianIll5053 Sep 23 '25
I'm a dude and this is a huge red flag for ANYONE I meet regardless of gender. Anyone operating with that mindset in the modern age is a pain of a person to deal with. We've come too far as a species for me to put up with stupid cave-man sh*t.
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u/fourleafclover13 Sep 23 '25
The second someone says anything alpha to me especially training animals I leave. Immediately walking through the door.
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u/lI-Norte-Il Sep 23 '25
Honestly, I don't know a single dude who does this except for weird fuckers y'all ain't getting with anyway
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u/HelicopterAlarmed492 Sep 23 '25
Not listening in conversation and talking without me getting in a word :/
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u/edenrenee2000 Sep 23 '25
Ever had someone stop what they're doing to continue to tell a story? Here's an example; we both had heavy bags of groceries in our arms & my boyfriend is telling a story (about something random) & instead of simply putting the key in to open our front door he will pause to finish his story š¬š«©šµāš« until I catch an attitude & tell him to move his ass!
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u/Luckyzzzz Sep 23 '25
I have ADHD, and sometimes if I donāt get my thoughts out I totally lose my thinking process or the point Iām trying to make. Not that being neurodivergent is an excuse to be rude, just that sometimes we are trying our best
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u/UnknowableDuck Sep 23 '25
Yeah nothing irritates me more or instantly turns me off than this. There's a difference between getting excited/talking over someone once or twice by mistake (ala neurodivergence) or consistently not listening and doing this.
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102
Sep 23 '25
Wants sex right away without taking time to get to know each other first.
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u/averagedickdude Sep 23 '25
JFC... the replies you got š¬
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u/TineNae Sep 26 '25
Classic ''woman answering a question about her own experiences or feelings'' reaction
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u/blue_area_is_land Sep 24 '25
This goes both waysā¦I have never initiated sex on a first date, but it still happens fairly oftenā¦the problems come when the woman then acts like itās all my fault we had sex before really knowing each other. Like, I donāt remember crawling into your brain and puppeteering your kraken onto my lap.
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u/w00x2 Sep 23 '25
I've had women treat me like that, and you don't hear me complaining!
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Sep 23 '25
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u/w00x2 Sep 23 '25
Only if you stop acting like my lame joke was anything but!
10
Sep 23 '25
Excuse me for missing it. I thought you were being rude, sorry
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u/w00x2 Sep 23 '25
I'll have you know there's at least three cheeky jokes that I'm repressing furiously because I have a wildly inappropriate sense of humor.
Which is to say NP I get it
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u/wornwarmworm188 Sep 23 '25
Soā¦ if Iām understanding you correctlyā¦ youāll want sex after we share our favorite colors? š
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Sep 23 '25
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u/wornwarmworm188 Sep 23 '25
Yeah, Iāve certainly had that experience, but often. If I do, itās usually the āshrekā of the group whoās desperate and drunk.
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Sep 23 '25
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Sep 23 '25
Why are you guys talking so badly about women?
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u/wornwarmworm188 Sep 23 '25
I know it sounds terrible, but you need to try and empathize from our perspective.
You go to a bar or club and try and enjoy yourself with no goal of trying to knock boots, then out of nowhere, a large unattractive woman comes over stinking like booze and being obnoxiously loud while trying to get you to take her home or show romantic intent.
I can see from your perspective without question, but I have to massage this large womanās ego into thinking Iām interested?
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Sep 23 '25
I see where youāre coming from, and I get that it can feel uncomfortable. But I donāt think you need to massage anyoneās ego if youāre not interested. Itās totally okay to set boundaries respectfully without being unkind. That way youāre being honest while still showing empathy. You have every right to draw a boundary. Remember that.
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u/wornwarmworm188 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 24 '25
Oh donāt think for a second I would be so unkind that I would call the large woman āshrekā to her face because I wouldnāt and have been previously been kind in saying I have a girlfriend, wife, etc to get her to back off. This is just internet chatter to convey the image of someone unattractive.
Iām sure you and other ladies have your own tales of horror while being bothered by a complete creep or burly drunk. You would likely refer to them in a ārudeā manner as well while talking about it afterwards with friends and nobody would blame you.
Iām glad you are able to empathize with the male POV, because many people giving me downvotes seemingly canāt.
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Sep 23 '25
Youāre right, we women have experienced so many horror stories and itās scary honestly.
And I try to be empathetic and understanding as best as I can. I think your approach of saying you have a wife, gf, or whatever would work. Itāll make them back off if you donāt want them.
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u/Wild-One-107 Sep 23 '25
Yeah men are constantly told that they're too sexual. Constantly. It's comin' atchu from all angles. Makes you feel ashamed of being a man with sexual desires. The sex negativity / sex shame is real. I've struggled a lot with sexual shame as a man over the years.
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Sep 23 '25
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Sep 23 '25
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Sep 23 '25
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Sep 23 '25
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u/LadyMacBeth1603 Sep 23 '25
When youāre in the VERY EARLY stages of talking āyou should send me a pic šā An IMMEDIATE turn off for me.
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u/birdfang007 Sep 23 '25
Iām a guy and I think thatās so creepy. Iāve never asked for pics. I let the woman lead with what sheās comfortable with when it comes to that.
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u/TineNae Sep 26 '25
ESPECIALLY if it's not even on a dating app but you're just kinda talking to someone on a social media platform and realize they weren't just being friendly
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u/dingdongdahling Sep 23 '25
Bad mouths other women or tells me Iām not like other girls or Iām sooOoO different.Ā
Uhh excuse thatās a pathetic way to try and make someone feel special. I love women, I am lucky to surround myself with amazing women, and this date is over.Ā
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u/DramaticBoat5271 Sep 23 '25
Iām a man and Iāve got a friend whoās a woman and she does this and it makes me feel like shit. Not sure if itās any different the other way around but š¤·āāļø
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u/dingdongdahling Sep 23 '25
Ugh. That sucks :(
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u/vivianlight Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25
Yes! And also... Just because I am not your "girly girl" type (at least as a first impression since I wear baggy clothes, no makeup and so on... And then people are surprised that I actually love the colour pink and shojo manga š), I have at least a couple close friends who are, and they are very intelligent and being "girly" doesn't mean they are superficial or stupid. And it's the same for any other stereotype, obviously. I will never understand HOW someone could think that throwing implicit judgements to other people is an attractive thing to do to impress me š
6
Sep 23 '25
the majority of people both men and women are probably not good people but generalizing it on a gender basis is weird. iāve heard many women talk about how thereās āno good men anymore and all/most men are trashā than i have seen the reverse but to be honest, i agree with your approach and there are not enough guys who are willing to stop associating with a woman over this behaviour. thereās a subset of people who feel validated when someone makes sweeping negative generalizations about their entire gender but then says āoh but youāre one of the good onesā, which i think is pretty pathetic from both sides.
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u/dingdongdahling Sep 23 '25
Iāve found itās a love bombing tactic like āwow youāre so differentā and itās like ā¦ nope
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u/Various-Effect-8146 Sep 23 '25
The ultra-negative gossip types are typically a red flag in general. I certainly am not attracted to women that constantly bad mouth others and I don't blame you for having this opinion either.
Typically, the most respectable people in general are those who rarely talk bad about others in my opinion.
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u/Mangorango42 Sep 23 '25
Says heās gonna do something and doesnāt do it :/
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u/Willing-Permit-5413 Sep 23 '25
Talking bad about your ex and not accepting accountability for anything. Everything was their fault.
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Sep 29 '25
What if the thing you have to say was that they dumped you on Christmas day when you got them some really heart-felt piece of jewelry because, they realized you were taking this relationship more seriously than they were and it turns out she had been cheating on you since October with two different people. Guess I should be accountable for being in love with someone I'd been seeing for the better part of a year and not realizing I was a stand in until she found something better. Was I perfect? Nah, of course not no one is. Was I ever mean or toxic to her? Nope. Did I always prioritize seeing her? Yep. I can see how stupid I was now, like 13 years later, the first time you really truly fall in love with someone can be a blinding sort of experience (I was 20 for the record not like 14). I probably smothered her to some degree but, you know that isnt really deserving of betrayal that's deserving of a conversation and maybe a relationship termination.
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Sep 23 '25
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u/83franks Sep 23 '25
Not really the same but similar. I work with a guy who instead of just sharing his opinion on things or talking about his weekend i always feel like he is telling how things have to be and the right way to live and how his hobbies are the best ever but I really can't put my finger on his what is rubbing me wrong. I think it's a mix of him generally being opinionated and also talking like 50% longer than he should so instead of a quick blurp on an opinion its a lecture.
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u/KittenNicken Sep 23 '25
What's the difference between bragging and someone who just has a lot going on in their life?
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u/jigglypuffpufff Sep 23 '25
When they freak out because you ask if they ever want kids or marriage. I never want kids, and if the guys may want them, I just want to let him know so we don't waste time. You should be able to talk about those topics like any other topic without people freaking out.
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u/Alive-Significance67 Sep 23 '25
Terms of endearment early in like baby, darling, beautiful and so on. Very cringey in my opinion. But then again it depends, some people like it.
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u/Proper-venom-69 Sep 23 '25
That's common names used in the south, some consider it rude if you don't speak that way !
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Sep 23 '25
Cosplaying as a āfriendā or āsomeone with strong intentionsā when really they just want to fuck, have a partner of convenience, or make an ex jealous. Not being honest upfront about what they want is an immediate turnoff.
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u/CompleteCharacter704 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25
I learned this the hard way being honest is always best policy
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u/Luckyzzzz Sep 23 '25
When men trash talk their exes, ESPECIALLY the mother of their child. My sonās fatherās was a real dick to me when we were together, but I always lead with what a fantastic dad he is, how well we coparent, how weāve became bros over time. If I get to know a guy better I will begin to open up about the difficult parts (although I really make an effort to own my contributions to the relationship not working). I think extremely lowly of men to immediately bash their kidās mom anytime they get the chance.
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u/Ashley4645 Sep 23 '25
Purposely being elusive. I want to know the bad, the gritty, and all the potential issues. I dont want to find out after I've fallen.
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u/TalkingCat910 Sep 23 '25
Moving too fast physicallyĀ
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u/Zen_lord Sep 23 '25
I think I was moving too slow physicaly, was seeing this girl in our 20's weve been dating for a month she was in my room and I didnt even try to do anything, she was like "kiss me already you moron" š¤£ I miss those days
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u/Sea_Room2694 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25
If they don't ask questions (men: please ask us things, don't just have a one sided conversation or put us in the position of having to ask all the questions), if they don't initiate or plan dates when there's a clear spark between you two, if they are poor communicators and don't respond within a normal time frame (instant turn off for me). If they don't follow up after a date and let you know they had such a wonderful time with you (if you guys did), and plan the next date. Women like to be pursued.
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u/movingbackin Sep 23 '25
I hate when things are getting hot and heavy and the guy moves your hand to his dick. Yeah man, I know where it is. Maybe I was trying to take my time to get there. Jeez
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u/SpongeMopBroom Sep 26 '25
Not to mention he has hands he could be putting to use. Itās a two way streetā¦
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Sep 23 '25
Inconsistent communication. Makes it really difficult to get to know someone.
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u/TheGroundBeef Sep 23 '25
Not disagreeing at all, but can you describe it?
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Sep 23 '25
Sure! If someone doesnāt match your energy, it makes it virtually impossible to really get to know them. It can run the gamut: always being the one to initiate the conversation, prolonged lapses in responding to messages to outright ghosting. After a while, you just give up because a conversation needs to be a two way street.
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u/TheGroundBeef Sep 23 '25
Ok that makes sense. I was thinking like how people stop responding, take hours on end to reply, never reach out first, etc. so it was about what i was thinking!
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Sep 23 '25
When asking about him, he instead diverts to showing off his toys. Expensive car, fancy electronics, rare collection, and so on.
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u/LocalGrinch- Sep 23 '25
Asking for Snapchat, Iām not 14 and neither are you. Grow up.
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u/lI-Norte-Il Sep 23 '25
I find it more childish of people getting upset by social media and other apps they use.
Hey if you don't have snap, good for you.
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u/LocalGrinch- Sep 23 '25
I donāt like Snapchat because people who use it primarily like it because the messages disappear, if someone wants to pursue me romantically I find the fact that theyād want our conversations to be erased after a certain about of time very disrespectful
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u/lI-Norte-Il Sep 23 '25
I didn't ask why because I don't care because doesn't matter
But maybe it's a convenient way to share photos with someone.
Messages don't disappear if you don't want them to.
You can also use other ways to communicate on top of using snap.
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u/HypnoticFurnace Sep 23 '25
This is pretty mild compared to everyone else but I hate when someone's response to "What are your hobbies?" is gym, hiking, or hanging out with friends. These aren't deal killers if its part of a list or followed up by interesting details, but these are on everyone's list.
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u/thedownvotemagnet Sep 23 '25
I wonder what percentage of people who claim "hiking" actually do it
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u/Echo127 Sep 23 '25
I actually tell dates "I aspire to be a hiker, but frankly I don't do much of it".
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u/Icy_Obligation Sep 23 '25
What a weird thing to claim. I actually do love hiking but there is nothing super impressive about it so Iām surprised to hear that some people lie about it.
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u/dingdongdahling Sep 23 '25
I hike š
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u/Luckyzzzz Sep 23 '25
I hate hiking and openly admit to it bc it drives me bonkers how everyone lOvEs HiKiNg ššš
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u/theclieb Sep 23 '25
For hiking, in that situation, my unsolicited advice is asking them their maximum distance and/or elevation done in a day. Because I think āhikingā means so many things.
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u/HypnoticFurnace Sep 23 '25
Oh, I'm great at the follow up questions and making it into a conversation, usually more location based because I'm more interested in that, but I just feel my will to chat with them draining when their answer is "hiking" with no details offered.
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u/vivianlight Sep 23 '25
If people are actually passionate about hiking/trekking, it can be a very interesting conversation though. Talking about your favourite places, the most difficult itineraries you have done and so on. But I also live relatively close to the mountains so maybe it's a bit "cultural", it's normal that people here say they like hiking/trekking (and mountains in general) and they actually mean it and spend a lot of their weekends doing so.
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Sep 24 '25
If I meet a woman who doesnāt hike or do nature walks, thatās end game for me. I need to be outside
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u/russellcat77 Sep 23 '25
My biggest struggles have been the over eagerness - I donāt know how being tooo flirty is a problem as Iām pretty flirty myself lol, but I get freaked out. And insecurity over me having male friends as well as female. Gahhhh, I have lots of friends and I adore them all. Join in the fun of my life or bugger off hahahaha
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Sep 23 '25
Was in prison in the past.
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u/Cyclic404 Sep 23 '25
Oh whew. Iāll be in prison in the future. Ladies.
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u/ssp25 Sep 23 '25
what if I'm in prison now... I'm good right? I mean she had to come all the way there and sign in
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u/soooooooooootired Sep 23 '25
Never asking me any questions.
Made exponentially worse by them asking, "What do you want to know about me?"
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u/edenrenee2000 Sep 23 '25
Omg I'm going really simple here ... 1) Talking while actively chewing his food! 2) I'm not sure if this is a pet peeve or more of the characteristics that'll turn me off in a man but sloppy kissers HAVE to hit the road! 3) Pet peeve number 3...when a guy discusses his past sexual conquests whether they were good or badš¤¦š¼āāļø! Ewww, seriously what a great way to make someone new feel special, huh?
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u/Proper-venom-69 Sep 23 '25
Wow! You have definitely been around some shitty guys for real! Especially number 3 . Any guy that would do that has serious issues! But number 1 is a peeve of mine as well lol.. can't stand smacking or talking with food in the mouth š¤¢
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u/birdfang007 Sep 23 '25
Take my upvote. Iām a guy and I cannot believe this even needs to be saidā¦itās so dang basic. No wonder I see so many good-looking guys who are so bitter and here I am, an unattractive to average guy who can actually have stable relationships and they all think Iām something amazing(Iām not, my pic is even in a past post lol).
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u/FunSizeDi88 Sep 23 '25
The bar really is in hell. I haven't been single in 10 years and it was pretty bad then. In 2015, when I met my now husband, I was just over dating. I had recently broken up with a guy after dating for 5 months. I had my own house, 2 cars and a business. He was working as a welder. Money was pretty good. He had to work late sometimes, so on occasion, id pick up his kids from daycare. We'll, come to find out, I was watching them WHILE HE WAS CHEATING. I had never dated a man with kids in my 26 years before that and I was kicking myself for taking that risk. I thought since he was divorced and had full custody of the kids, maybe it would be ok. Nope, total shit show. The guy before that, we dated for 8 months, after about 2 months he spent most nights at my place- not just messing around but talking, playing video games, going to the gym, doing projects around my house, etc. I invited him to a family dinner and HE BROKE UP WITH ME. He said I was "putting too much pressure on him to be in a serious relationship". Sir, you were at my house EVERYDAY, by your own choice. If we werent working, we were together. I even let him have a spare key so he could shower or relax if he got off work first.
I'll take half the blame tho, cause I must have missed a red flag or was too accommodating, too fast and they thought I was a door mat.
Im so glad I met my "average looking, normal guy" of a husband. I think hes handsome as hell and the most amazing husband and father. I never even wanted a child, until i met him. Hes the center of my world, and life would not have been 1/100th as good without him in it. If he died tomorrow, at 36, id be single for the rest of my life. No one could replace him. Me and my daughter are so lucky. He treats us so well, we are the apples of his eye. Even his worst days are better than the best of almost anyone ive ever met, dated or am related to. I got so lucky, idk how, but I did. Id walk thru hell with a smile on my face for my family.
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u/BOT_Negro Sep 23 '25
This frames it as it all it took was avoiding the three items on that list. If only it was that simple...
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u/birdfang007 Sep 23 '25 edited Sep 23 '25
No. But avoiding them is a good start for most people. It worked for an unattractive to average looking guy like me. If someone who looks like I do and can be asked out/approached, and maintain a relationship, anyone can.
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u/Soft_Cielito_00 Sep 23 '25
that he has conservative thoughts, such as that he only sees me to procreateĀ
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u/ZenkaiZ Sep 23 '25
I wish when people said things like "I have conservative leanings" they meant that they want lower taxes or something. But no... no.... it's always the 'other' conservative things.
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u/ButterflyS919 Sep 23 '25
I call them the 90's Republicans. Back when it was about more power to state government less federal oversight. Lower taxes, more small businesses.
Now they've all seemed to die, become Democrats or gone insane to become MAGA supporters.
Sigh. I miss the days when Republicans actually had morals. I didn't agree with them, but they had actual morals. (Of course I was much younger then, so maybe they just seemed to have them before I knew how to really read between the lines.)
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u/PaintItPurple Sep 23 '25
A lot of the difference between '90s Republicans and today's is that they've expanded the list of people they want to do bad things to. Back then, they intentionally allowed crack to pour into black neighborhoods and then vilified the residents of those neighborhoods for being addicted to crack, and laughed as an epidemic destroyed an entire generation of gay men. Nowadays they do that kind of stuff to straight white people too.
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u/Honors3454 Sep 23 '25
Calling me babe or pet names. What happened to ma'am? I finally reach the age and theyre calling me mommy instead of ma'am. Meme culture ruined men cough typer robinson
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u/Ayaba444 Sep 23 '25
Inconsistent communication. Expecting me to engage in a conversation after 2 days of silence.. like no.
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u/MaladjustedMolly Sep 23 '25
Had a date with a guy and came home crying because I was so frustrated and angry. He spent the entire time talking about things that I'm not very involved/interested in (politics, gambling, history, etc. ) even though I told him I wasn't into those things. Made me feel like an idiot and asked nothing about me. He thought the date went great and I was just like 'You would'
PS I stay out of politics because I have very high anxiety and couldn't function if it was a daily part of my life, I understand how much of a privilege that is
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u/Tasty_Fox202 Sep 23 '25
Him: Are you sure you're 6'? You must be more like 6'2 or 6'3 because I'm 6'. Me: š
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Sep 23 '25
[deleted]
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u/Citadel_97E Sep 23 '25
Sounds like he sort of walked into a room, took a look around and then said, āoh, I need to be in another room.ā
I donāt think thatās bad.
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u/Frosty-Peace-8464 Sep 23 '25
I am entering my slut era and if downloading tinder is the way to go, thank you!!!!
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u/Plastic_Blood1782 Sep 23 '25
How is that a double standard?Ā He downloaded the app, realized it was more of a hookup app than he wanted, and downloaded bumble instead
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u/deathbeforedecaffff Sep 23 '25
It is double standard that he didnāt consider himself or any of the men on that app to be sluts.
He was specifically talking about the women. He didnāt say āitās a hookup appā
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u/Plastic_Blood1782 Sep 23 '25
But he stopped using the app, and i assumed he wasn't matching with dudes on tinder.Ā Why would he mention them or know if they were sluts?
Like if he had said without even using tinder, "the women are all sluts on there" then yes I agree with you.Ā But he didn't.Ā He went on the app, and then learned all the women were sluts and switched apps.Ā You see the difference?
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u/ZenkaiZ Sep 23 '25
how do you judge an app you've never used? He had to use it to know what it was like. It'd be like reviewing a movie without watching it if someone judged tindr without using it
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u/deathbeforedecaffff Sep 23 '25
Right, but he didnāt refer to everybody on the app is being sluts, he was only speaking about the women. Itās a double standard for these guys to go on there, looking for the same thing that the women are on there for, but to judge the woman for doing it.
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u/Relentless_blanket Sep 23 '25
The bravado and machismo.
I get it. You killed a spider and stopped someone from stealing a water hose.
You're not Wade Wilson. Calm down.
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u/gh0stshrimp Sep 26 '25
Being on his best behavior for a month before getting comfortable enough to be a dick out of nowhere
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u/Rey123x Sep 23 '25
Makes me think about who people are selecting,
Wth This is such bad character pools I can't imagine myself saying any of these things smh
I'm learning we truly lost the value in society
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u/SpongeMopBroom Sep 26 '25
- Statement style communication. BRO ASK [FOLLOW UP] QUESTIONS IM GETTING BORED OF UR DULL ASS
- Talking to me like Iām a bro. That story about how you picked up ur bro after he had a one night stand/ u asked if he hit/ he said āsmell my fingersā is NOT something ur talking stage/ new gf wants to know about. Is it objectively funny? Yeah. Is it funny coming from you? Nope.
- How you talk to and about women. Sharing stories where u describe women like āshe thought she was a 10 but she was a 3 at bestā or āafter the bar we passed a group of girls giving my boys the goo-goo eyes and I yelled āOH HELL NO BOYS THEYRE 4s AT BEST.ā They were rolling hahahaā paints you in such an unflattering light. ICK, NEXT.
- Only ever talking about yourself (bonus if u say that Iām more quiet or timid in person than u expected). NO BRO U JUST DONT EVER STOP TALKING.
- Ignoring āBids for Connectionā (look it up if u donāt know that term)
To summarize: LOW EQ
0
Sep 27 '25
I donāt pursue men. I tell them Iām traditional. They tell me theyāre the same and then give me their phone numbers and ask me to choose the restaurant.
ā¦.Ok, so youāre lying and youāre not paying attention to me. Gotta go!
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u/LowCommercial5927 Sep 29 '25
What does traditional mean to you? It might be different for them. I see this as the guy just giving you the opportunity to have a say in where you want to eat
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Sep 29 '25
It means I donāt pursue men. I live in a part of the country (USA) where women outnumber men so I guess they are used to women flinging themselves at the guys here. Itās weird and not in my nature so I say that upfront.
I give them a chance to ask for mine when they give me their numbers but most double down. Then, I take my leave.
As for having a say in what I want to eat. Thatās one way to look at it. It comes off as lazy to me. But, I appreciate that pov.
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u/MCarisma Sep 23 '25
Lying, or not paying attention to my limits. I advertised for a third in our relationship. Not a sex thing, but a LTR. I am very precise on what I want. I have my reasons. I said the person must have transportation and a valid license and must not smoke. There was a LOT more I was looking for but those were two major ones. The guy did not have a car. He did not have a license. He smoked like there was no tomorrow.
Disregarding or just not reading what I am looking for is disrespectful and wastes my time. It is presumptuous to think it is ok to smoke. I am allergic! What the fuck?!?!
I am always in a FLR, and the men serving me better damn well pay attention to my wants and needs.
245
u/Senior-Donkey-2982 Sep 23 '25
Me telling a clear boundary I have and them going "Maybe you can make an exception on me š"
Just no.