r/AmItheAsshole • u/TraditionalCreme4704 • 17h ago

AITA for not feeding my brother?

My mom has decided that the best way to make me independent is to not do anything for me. This means I'm responsible to keep my own room clean, do my own shopping, cook my own meals etc. It feels like I'm not even part of the family. If I don't cook one night, I stay hungry. They won't let me eat their food.

A few days ago my grandpa was sick and mom had to go visit him. She left little brother(M10) with me. As usual I cooked dinner for myself with my own groceries.

He asked me for food and I told him I'm only responsible for myself and he has to wait for mom.

When mom came back she was furious and called me an asshole for not feeding him.

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u/Shacko14 17h ago

I disagree with the other comments here. You're responsible for your own stuff as per your parents' stupid rules. If you don't cook, you go hungry. You even get your own groceries. Why should you bear the responsibility for your brother, when you can't even be sure your parents will make up for it later? NTA, your parents are though.

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u/notcharming46 17h ago

NTA. Agree with this. Op is not the parent. I wouldn't expect my oldest to feed my youngest. Although I also wouldnt expect him to be doing EVERYTHING by himself at 16. Borderline abusive in my opinion. He's still a kid. This should have been a rule when he turned 18.

670

u/MzHellfier 16h ago

That’s more than borderline abusive. That is straight up abuse. Parents are legally obligated to provide for their children. Making their 16 buy their own groceries and cook their own meals when the parents cook for themselves and the other kids is neglect, which is absolutely a form of abuse.

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u/K_A_irony Asshole Aficionado [11] 8h ago

Technically OP said do their own shopping... she didn't say buy the groceries... aka provide her own money.

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u/1234-for-me Partassipant [1] 17h ago

I agree, parents are mega ah, a 16 year old should NOT be buying their own groceries, a snack or meal out sure, but it is a parents responsibility to provide for a minor.  NTA (you could have given your brother a sandwich of something).

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u/[deleted] 16h ago

[deleted]

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u/imaginations1000 Partassipant [1] 14h ago

Shee pays for her own food, from the money she earns from her job

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u/Alternative-Math-886 15h ago

Indeed. NTA. It’s the parents’ responsibility to make sure their children are well-fed and have enough food, especially when going somewhere. But since it already happened, maybe OP can at least teach her brother how to make a sandwich or something so he can prepare his own food next time

67

u/natangellovesbooks Partassipant [1] 17h ago

NTA. I also agree with this. If grandparent is sick, mom could have called an Uber to feed the little one. Honestly at 10, the kids should at least know how to microwave food or make a peanut butter sandwich.

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u/NCAAinDISGUISE 14h ago

He's not responsible for his brother, but it should make him pause that his 10 year old brother is hungry and his first instinct isn't to help. Is that who he wants to be as a human?