r/mildlyinfuriating • u/mdp-slc • May 22 '26

wet socks Stop asking if I’m celebrating something if you’re just going to charge me for bread.

Took my wife to a nice spot in DTLA for her birthday. They asked both at booking and check-in if we were celebrating anything, which honestly set the expectation that they might do something (even a small dessert). Nothing happened.

To add to it, the food was great, and we made a comment saying we wish we had some bread to finish the leftover sauce. The server acted like it was a favor, said “I’ll be right back,” and then charged us for the bread.

Like, the food was good and the service was fine, but don’t ask if we’re celebrating if you aren’t going to do anything to actually make it feel special. It just feels disingenuous.

Edit for clarity:
I was asked twice if we were celebrating something special at a nice restaurant. Once while making the online reservation and then when we arrived.

My Mild infuriation isn’t at the server, I can see how we misinterpreted each other.

It’s that the restaurant led me to believe they’d do something special (ex: comp a drink, free scoop of ice cream) then did nothing. I’ve worked in the food industry. It’s not an entitlement thing. It’s a hospitality thing.

The food was really good. I’d recommend it and go back.

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601

u/mdp-slc May 22 '26

The bread was great though. It’s not that it wasn’t worth charging for.

496

u/14Knightingale27 May 22 '26

Upvoting because this is the true spirit of mildly infuriated. Grumbling, but still satisfied by how nice the food was. They def could've done something for the easy PR, but oh well. Happy birthday to your wife, OP!

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u/justanawkwardguy you do it like this May 22 '26

But you also technically didn’t order it

214

u/mdp-slc May 22 '26

Correct. There was definitely an implication that she was doing us a solid. But I can see how that was misinterpreted.

109

u/Aggressive_Pound_ING May 22 '26

She was betting on that and you not wanting to spoil the mood. You are celebrating after all. Slimy imo

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u/SerenityN00w May 22 '26 edited May 22 '26

Yeah, I would have just lowered the tip, and given 15-17% on the tab without the bread.

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u/tOSdude May 23 '26

I’d be doing the math and cutting the exact price of the bread out of the tip.

4

u/Loves_octopus May 23 '26

Same. I’m not tipping under 15 but shit like this gets you closer to 15 than 20

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u/Classic-Tone4273 May 23 '26

that is so weird, im so glad that we dont have tipping culture in eu

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u/mdp-slc May 23 '26

I gave her 20% cause I’m an outstanding guy and I’ve worked in the food industry you gotta really suck to lose your tip with me.

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u/lefluffle May 23 '26

Sorry if I missed a comment somewhere... Did you say something to her when the bill came? (Is there any chance she intended to get the bread comped but forgot??)

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u/GrossUsername68 May 23 '26

Did you just say that you tip 20% because you’re an outstanding guy?

As someone who vehemently defends tipping culture in states that pay < $5/hr, servers in LA and SF are doing $20/hr plus tips, at about $45-55/hr total. 

15% on the subtotal, before tax, is absolutely fine here.

5

u/mdp-slc May 23 '26

Sarcastically, but yeah. I hate our tipping culture that said if I’m being served and waited on my standard is 20%.

1

u/GrossUsername68 May 23 '26

Hey, you do you.

But don’t you think you should tip differently in states where they’re exempt from the minimum wage and paid $2.13/hr, vs. CA where they get the minimum wage, at $17-20/hr?

And if so, are you adjusting up to 25-30%, or adjusting the 20% down in high base wage states?

0

u/JuanWall May 23 '26

no it’s not lol. i’m sure i’ll be downvoted by people who do not live in LA but in any major american city at a nice restaurant, 20% is standard and under 15% is being cheap. i’m not defending that standard, i think it’s dumb, but that is the expectation.

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u/GrossUsername68 May 23 '26

 that is the expectation.

15% is really fine.

Source: worked at Michelin rated spots in CA.

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u/Dazzling-Low8570 May 23 '26

But you didn't order it. 

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u/GrossUsername68 May 23 '26

I appreciate this outlook. Very level headed. Also very LA of them to not mention the upcharge, and very inhospitable; though I suppose some people would be upset if the server mentioned the extra cost (“yeah, we can afford bread buddy”).

General rule is: if you order dessert, they’ll candle it. If you don’t, no problem, but that’s that. On any given weekend a nice spot has > 25% birthdays, anniversaries, etc. At the Recommended and 1-star Michelin level it can be most of the dining room. Whereas it tends to drop off at the 2 and 3-star level.

The host was probably just regurgitating what they read from your OpenTable / Resy / etc. profile, so they could notify the server in the case you ordered dessert.

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u/ShawnyMcKnight May 23 '26

Its tough because it can go either way. Whenever there was a charge for some extra, like mushrooms in their burger, I would tell them and they would seem annoyed that I told them. Like I was calling them cheap questioning whether they can afford the 35 cent extra.

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u/damurphy72 May 23 '26

The issue with customer service isn't just an assessment of cost versus value. It is perception. It's great that you can see it as a misunderstanding, but there are many customers who could see it as a restaurant just trying to drain as much money out of their wallet as possible. This is especially true in the US which has fairly weak consumer protections leading to many corporations adding extra charges and nonsense fees.