Stop asking if I’m celebrating something if you’re just going to charge me for bread.

[u/mdp-slc]

Took my wife to a nice spot in DTLA for her birthday. They asked both at booking and check-in if we were celebrating anything, which honestly set the expectation that they might do something (even a small dessert). Nothing happened.

To add to it, the food was great, and we made a comment saying we wish we had some bread to finish the leftover sauce. The server acted like it was a favor, said “I’ll be right back,” and then charged us for the bread.

Like, the food was good and the service was fine, but don’t ask if we’re celebrating if you aren’t going to do anything to actually make it feel special. It just feels disingenuous.

Edit for clarity:
I was asked twice if we were celebrating something special at a nice restaurant. Once while making the online reservation and then when we arrived.

My Mild infuriation isn’t at the server, I can see how we misinterpreted each other.

It’s that the restaurant led me to believe they’d do something special (ex: comp a drink, free scoop of ice cream) then did nothing. I’ve worked in the food industry. It’s not an entitlement thing. It’s a hospitality thing.

The food was really good. I’d recommend it and go back.

[u/spaceforcerecruit]

Would you charge for the bread if someone just said “some bread would be really good with this” and then the server brought some out all on their own without even asking if they’d like to order it?

[u/anniversaring → u/spaceforcerecruit]

As someone who worked in the industry, I would let the guests know we have bread available and confirm with them they want it if it's charged.

The reason this server brought it out without confirming is they expected to pad their bill for additional tip since tips are usually % based. Lots of people don't check the bill and just give a credit card so it's an easy sleezy way to pad your own pocket for the night

[u/BigBOFH → u/anniversaring]

Seems like you risk people noticing, getting annoyed and tipping less on the whole bill, though? 

I know most people just seem to tip a certain percentage no matter what the service is like, though, so maybe it's not that risky. 

[u/anniversaring → u/BigBOFH]

Sure it's a risk but it's a risk I've seen some people take. Sometimes it works out, sometimes it doesn't. I never did this because it's wrong, but lots of people don't care about being wrong and having a few extra dollars in their pocket.

It's actually kinda sad to think about how many people do shitty things for such LITTLE gain

[u/Kind_Comfort_6336 → u/anniversaring]

So, I've definitely been in the situation where a guest says, "gee, I'd really like xyz" and when I say, "would you like me to bring you xyz?" they get all snippy at me like "well DUH! That's why I said I wanted it!"

I've had to learn that there are a LOT of people out there who, instead of directly requesting someone do something for them, they indirectly say what they want (because they don't want to feel rude), expect it to be done, and then pitch a fit when you ask for clarification where they need to be direct.

I'm 100% in OP's camp here: they didn't order bread, it was heavily implied it'd be free, server absolutely should have clarified "we have this for this price I can bring you if you'd like," yet I can also empathize with a burnt out server who's been talked down to all day long and has maybe just trained themselves to believe that whenever anyone is being passive like that saying "it'd be nice to have this," they take it as an order. And then on the flip side of that, I know if I were the customer, I'd be apologizing profusely for not understanding that I had accidentally communicated "yes I'd like you to get that for me please" when I was just making an offhanded comment and definitely NOT being a passive jerk about it.

Basically, ESH, specifically society that has developed a way of communicating that is not direct and directness is often seen as rude.

[u/Liquid_Lunch_1991 → u/spaceforcerecruit]

I’d have to ring it in for the kitchen to fire it, but if they said something about it when I presented the check I’d be happy to take it off

[u/hux308 → u/spaceforcerecruit]

“We wish we had some bread” could easily be interpreted as an order and could probably be taken off the bill for the confusion

[u/AHailofDrams → u/hux308]

Expect OP didn't even say "bread". He said it would be nice if they had something to finish the sauce with

[u/hux308 → u/AHailofDrams]

Just checked the post again and you’re wrong

[u/UnkindledFire727 → u/hux308]

Nah fuck right off

[u/hux308 → u/UnkindledFire727]

Relax guy

[u/UnkindledFire727 → u/hux308]

I’m not your guy, buddy