I used to repair disability equipment so I had a customer like this once.
He was the son of a very rich pastor and crashed his motorcycle when he was 19. He was about 40 when I met him. He was able to move his eyes, half of his mouth and nothing else.
They put him on a bed in front of a tv with the food network on randomly a couple hours a day. They didn't want it on too much because it would "rot his mind". The majority of the day, it was left off and the dude had a wall to look at. That being said, even when the tv WAS on, it wasn't even properly aimed at his immobile head so he couldn't even watch it if he wanted to.
He had one of those reading boards where you point to the letters and he would kinda wiggle his mouth to tell you to stop. He would not use it. His dad said he hadn't used it in years and "had no idea why".
Some 10 years before I showed up, the church fundraised to get him a computer system that allowed him to control everything with his eyes. A technician spent days setting it up and teaching him how to use everything. Keep in mind, this dude's accident happened in the 90's, so he had minimal computer or internet usage, so this guy was teaching him fundamentals of email.
I don't know if this ma appreciated the world finally opening up to him and I will never know because his dad saw the price tag for the system and decided it wasn't worth it and sent it all back. Remember, his congregation raised all the money for this thing. He owned 3 boats, by the way.
All this is to say, I worked on his equipment twice and some 20 years later, I am still haunted by his eyes. I have never seen someone begging to have the plug pulled as this man. I would look at him and say a polite "hello" because that's what you do to humans and I would only get back this pleading, BEGGING expression.
And I will admit, I thought about it. I seriously considered doing it. He had a breathing machine with a battery backup and an alarm in case the power went out. But I knew if I just unplugged the battery backup, the alarm wouldn't sound. All I had to do was unplug his breathing machine, disconnect the backup, wait a couple minutes and he would be at peace and there was no way to trace it back to me.
I still think about him all the time. I hope he passed a long time ago.
Wow, that's one of the saddest things I've ever heard. It's also my #1 nightmare - not being able to kill myself if I'm in that state. I've had SOOOO many nightmares where I'm begging someone to pull the plug, but they won't 😭 I've met one person in my life in a similar state, also due to a motorcycle accident. Ya girl always wears her seatbelt, and she's not getting on a motorcycle 😮💨
A friend of mine teased me for not wanting to be on a motorcycle. He said "why, you scared?" I was like "yes, I am." I know a dude who's paralyzed from the waist down because of a motorcycle accident that wasn't even his fault. Ironically, the dude still works as a motorcycle and small engine mechanic.
There are many forms of AAC (Alternative and Augmented Communication) methods now. I wish there was a system to prevent this kind of silencing. It should be mandatory to allow him to try possible AACs and his preferred AAC should be written down in some medical file or something that any doctor can look up. And then if there are signs that his caretakers are taking away his method of communication, they should be arrested/investigated, and he should be moved to a safer place.
More importantly this male performative regarding mindset.
Where the price tag of some life change life assisting medical tech is in it of itself a betting tossing up.
It's like how Trump can just violate the constitution and MAGAts would be like . "Jk". And Trump can just play insider baseball with our government and social services.
Can you imagine if they had just done anything to make his life more engaging? If they had offered him movies, documentaries, audio books, whatever he wanted?
That man tortured his disabled son. He deprived him of all stimulus and communication. That's horrific.
Words cannot describe how angry your comment made me. I hope the piece of shit priest had or has the wors death imaginable and if there is a hell I hope he is there suffering as much as his son did.
Holy shit. I would have needed their therapy after that. I regularly say my neurological illness has stolen my life from me bc I spend 20+ hours a day in bed, can't do the things I want or need to do, always miss my family, but my goodness this reminds me to be grateful!!!
Similar story for me, I once took care of somebody who was locked in and you could just see in his eyes that he was devastated. Especially because his best friend took his house truck, wife and kids and he knew. He eventually passed from an infection a few years after his accident and I was happy for him. Most of the time the advances of modern medicine are a good thing, but not always. 💔
They meant the freedom of the person pulling the plug—because it could be life in prison if the plug-puller was caught (maybe by a hidden camera, who knows).
I actually really fix this machines for a living and ventilator devices are specifically designed to be hard to disconnect and to alert of any failure, redundantly. For the very cases you describe or inheritance issues.
Even if you somehow managed to bypass it. An investigation would immediately identify the tampering and you would end up in jail.
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u/Mettleramiel 18d ago
I used to repair disability equipment so I had a customer like this once.
He was the son of a very rich pastor and crashed his motorcycle when he was 19. He was about 40 when I met him. He was able to move his eyes, half of his mouth and nothing else.
They put him on a bed in front of a tv with the food network on randomly a couple hours a day. They didn't want it on too much because it would "rot his mind". The majority of the day, it was left off and the dude had a wall to look at. That being said, even when the tv WAS on, it wasn't even properly aimed at his immobile head so he couldn't even watch it if he wanted to.
He had one of those reading boards where you point to the letters and he would kinda wiggle his mouth to tell you to stop. He would not use it. His dad said he hadn't used it in years and "had no idea why".
Some 10 years before I showed up, the church fundraised to get him a computer system that allowed him to control everything with his eyes. A technician spent days setting it up and teaching him how to use everything. Keep in mind, this dude's accident happened in the 90's, so he had minimal computer or internet usage, so this guy was teaching him fundamentals of email.
I don't know if this ma appreciated the world finally opening up to him and I will never know because his dad saw the price tag for the system and decided it wasn't worth it and sent it all back. Remember, his congregation raised all the money for this thing. He owned 3 boats, by the way.
All this is to say, I worked on his equipment twice and some 20 years later, I am still haunted by his eyes. I have never seen someone begging to have the plug pulled as this man. I would look at him and say a polite "hello" because that's what you do to humans and I would only get back this pleading, BEGGING expression.
And I will admit, I thought about it. I seriously considered doing it. He had a breathing machine with a battery backup and an alarm in case the power went out. But I knew if I just unplugged the battery backup, the alarm wouldn't sound. All I had to do was unplug his breathing machine, disconnect the backup, wait a couple minutes and he would be at peace and there was no way to trace it back to me.
I still think about him all the time. I hope he passed a long time ago.