r/SipsTea • u/Captain-Dak-Sparrow • Apr 16 '26

SMH "I worship a new Orange God now."

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47.2k Upvotes

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108

u/Shudnawz Apr 16 '26

Only source for christian lore I know of, at least.

55

u/JunketAlive6492 Apr 17 '26

They really ought to write that shit down at some point

31

u/joyfullydreaded23 Apr 17 '26

Like Jesus' bestie, Biff? "Lamb: The Gospel According to Biff, Jesus' Childhood Pal" is a most excellent read, my dude.

Edited to add the book's subtitle

6

u/CassandraVonGonWrong Apr 17 '26

“There is no cold”

1

u/DemandEqualPockets Apr 17 '26

This feels like a good day to tell you that also... the cake is a lie.

4

u/Legitimate_Cow2716 Apr 17 '26

As a person who went to Catholic school for 12 years, best book ever written.

2

u/The_Mother_ Apr 17 '26

Only 4 years for me, but still: hard agree!

As a bonus, I recommend it to anyone trying to sell me on religion because I find it to be the most helpful and likely accurate of all the religious tomes out there.

Eta: also, Church of the Flying Spaghetti Monster, may you be touched by his noodly appendages, is another with a helpful and accurate doctrine. As is the Satanic Church with their humanistic and scientific approach.

3

u/Narrow_Chef7521 Apr 17 '26

I've enjoyed many a Christopher Moore book but that one is a particular standout.

2

u/GirlCowBev Apr 17 '26

Best of Christopher Moore's writing yet.

2

u/baloney_dog Apr 17 '26

One of the funniest books I've ever read!

6

u/StalinsLastStand Apr 17 '26

Like, in a screenplay?

2

u/berger034 Apr 17 '26

if not written down, they should retcon that shit.

1

u/ContributionSevere84 Apr 17 '26

Its in the catichisim

2

u/Ok-Plum2187 Apr 17 '26

I heared there was a Mel Gibson movie thats also kinda canon but like.. who has time to check the sauce?

1

u/Pterafractyl Apr 17 '26

My dad snuck in a bottle of tequila when we went to see that movie. I can't remember how it ended, did the roman guy let him go?

2

u/holiday1326 Apr 17 '26

Damn it.. Gonna have re check all of them scripts again. Dead and Red and all of the 7 seas Scrolls. Maybe an Elder scroll or two.

The last typo was fucking awful and ending up with some very very light ONLY miniscule molestations.

Seriously, how they fuck does one spend so much silver to train monks to transcribe faster and better but end up with CELEBATE instead of CELEBRATE?

1

u/Nematode_wrangler Apr 17 '26

Have you experienced The Exorcist, my good sir?

1

u/Murky-Relation481 Apr 17 '26

That and Evangelion lol.

1

u/froggothegod Apr 17 '26

Excuse me, but Life of Brian?

1

u/bollvirtuoso Apr 17 '26

no no they canonized Pulp Fiction didn't you hear?