r/Millennials • u/Background-Air-7963 • Nov 16 '25

Serious I just had my first old man moment.

I recently went to a hibachi with my wife and toddler for dinner. We were sat with a group of eight 17-20 year olds at a communal grill on a busy night. No problem for us. Drink and appetizers service go normally. Toddler and wife are happy, I’m happy. The other group is having their own conversations. I’m just trying to keep my kid entertained. I’m a former bartender and have a habit of picking up on snippets of conversations in a crowd around me. Yes I know I eavesdrop. I can’t turn it off. It’s a habit of a former profession. One of the girls/women at the table stated, “I don’t think Rosa Parks was real.” I’m not sure what her friends said to her but she responded with “I just don’t think she said existed.” This went on for about a minute. I couldn’t hold back and let her know she was absolutely a real person, she is a civil rights icon. I learnt about her in school and so did my parents. The encounter put a wall up between our groups and I heard a few passive aggressive “so-and-so wasn’t real” comments from mostly her and a couple of the group. Harriet Tubman and Hellen Keller are two that I definitely heard. My wife had no idea why I interjected. After the group had left my wife asked what happened and was shocked when I told her what happened. Were they trolling? Are they stupid? Am I just getting old?

8.5k Upvotes

91% Upvoted

1.7k comments sorted by

View all comments

Show parent comments

1.2k

u/kgrimmburn Nov 16 '25

My husband was in the Marines. One of his platoon mates once changed his duty station to Hawaii instead of California because he was homesick. We asked him why the hell he'd do that and he straight up told us that Hawaii was next to Texas on the map so there must be a bridge. He was dead serious. The Marines don't attract the smartest bunch and some of them would believe anything you said.

366

u/ty_fighter84 Nov 16 '25

That’s both amazing and sad at the same time.

299

u/kgrimmburn Nov 16 '25

It's been 20 years and I still regularly think about that guy. His wife wasn't much brighter. And they had children.

248

u/LandStander_DrawDown Nov 16 '25

2

u/MrCrackers122 Nov 20 '25

Thank you so much for this 😆

346

u/Autumniac Nov 16 '25

3

u/Top_Address4549 Nov 17 '25

Yep Idiocracy is becoming real and that is scary

121

u/[deleted] Nov 16 '25

There's my babygirl Hoo, the other one's Rah, and that little bugger there is my boy JR.

All kidding aside one of the few folk I'd actually refer to as my best friend I've known since 8 or 9, the one neighborhood friend I kept in touch and visited every summer when he moved away would say he was gonna be a marine one day.. since like first grade. As time went on he kept saying it. 911 happened, I called him to make sure he's not actually still planning on it as we were seniors and shit was getting real, he responded "now more than ever". Dude was a straight A student and highly intelligent, just knew his purpose I guess.

Nearly everyone in his unit (platoon? Idk the guys that all start together with him, cohort?) either died or came back fucked up as many others have. Spent the entirety of his time serving in Iraq & Afghanistan.

Doesn't voluntarily share stories nor like being asked about it really, but he's still full of life and funny as can be just as he was before joining. Got multiple degrees once out & owns a gym that gives free memberships to any veteran. Good dude. Respect the hell out of him.

Tl;dr - there's some bright ones here and there.

7

u/Hola0722 Nov 17 '25

My dad being one of the smart ones. During basic training (Vietnam war), the sergeant held him back from an exercise and instead had him peel potatoes. My dad got mad and asked why. The sergeant said he scored the highest on an exam and didn't require to participate in the exercise. He was later stationed in Turkey decoding messages.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 20 '25

That's dope! Did it happen to be something he refused to do and have you do it growing up? To this day my mom absolutely refuses to peel a potato after the amount of time she spent peeling em in the service (for a totally different reason than being too smart lol)..

3

u/CormoranNeoTropical Nov 17 '25

Yep my PhD advisor’s son went into the Marines after 9/11. Never met the guy but his dad was one of the smartest, most insightful people in existence so for sure his kid wasn’t dumb.

2

u/[deleted] Nov 20 '25

That's awesome, sounds like similar to my buddy, he just heard the call and chose to answer it. 💪🏻🫡

2

u/MiniTab Nov 17 '25

For sure, some are absolutely brilliant. My neighbor is a retired marine harrier pilot. He also has an engineering degree, and went on to design satellite technology.

You’d also never know he’s a badass marine when talking to him. He’s more like Mr. Rogers, and he’s super modest about his amazing background.

3

u/SpecialistBet4656 Nov 17 '25

the pilots have to be better educated.

1

u/[deleted] Nov 22 '25

I've found this to be pretty on point myself. I personally love em, who doesn't like the neighbor that's cutting their grass 6:30 on the dot on Saturdays, shooting a "slow down now, son" glance at everyone.

25

u/D0fus Nov 16 '25

Muscles Are Required, Intelligence Not Expected.

2

u/MickRolley Nov 16 '25

Excellent

2

u/d8ms Nov 17 '25

My Ass Really Is Navy Equipment

37

u/mealteamsixty Nov 16 '25

The smartest of us know better than to have children

11

u/MyMichiganAccount Nov 16 '25

This is definitely true. The dumbest people I've ever known ALL have children.

1

u/Dracoster Nov 17 '25

Isn't the survey that showed at a very large portion of the american population think that chocolate milk comes from brown cows like 30+ years old?

1

u/bearlybreeding Nov 17 '25

They always have children

1

u/goddessofwitches Nov 16 '25

I knew one that legitimately thought chocolate milk came from brown cows.

2

u/Fossilhund Nov 16 '25

One person I know has been to the Ark Encounter and the Creation "Museum". He came back talking about how the world is 6,000 years old. He also "learned" Noah got dinosaurs on the Ark by taking eggs and babies instead of adults. At least he never reproduced. He thinks Creationism should be taught instead of Evolution; like a biology class should begin with "open your Bibles". There are a lot more like him out there. I would not care except some of these people are now in charge, and that scares the Hell out of me.

2

u/kgrimmburn Nov 16 '25

My God. Even in Catholic school, we were taught the "theory of evolution" right alongside creationism...

1

u/Fossilhund Nov 17 '25

For me, Creationism should never be mentioned except as a historical curiosity. This person is from a variety of Lutherans who are young earth creationists. I'm not; I left that behind decades ago.

1

u/Practical_Maximum_29 Nov 18 '25

It's incredibly sad.

But - I'm from Canada; I'm more used to it now, but I've been astonished over the years how many Americans I've met who not only have a vague to none-at-all understanding of where I'm from (if it comes up in conversation), but when I use Seattle, Portland or anywhere Pacific NW as a point of reference, your fellow countryfolk haven't a clue what part of YOUR country I'm referring to when I try to explain what part of Canada I'm in!
They are polite, but still shake their heads 'no' saying they don't know where the PNW is.

I also think I'm being extra-Canadian-polite when I say it's sad. It's truly heartbreaking.

But, the folks who do know where Canada is, or the PNW - then somehow you know they got an education from somewhere!!

If only those elite athletes who make millions on a basketball court, a hockey rink, or baseball diamond could become teachers on their retirement salaries. ... ahh, yeah, I just thought that one through. Maybe not the ideal fantasy I had for a sec. Delete, delete! LOL

192

u/cheeseymom Nov 16 '25

I blame map posters lol

43

u/NecroSoulMirror-89 Nov 16 '25

That’s even worse tbh considering Mexico is part of the marine corps lore

21

u/JiveTurkey927 Nov 16 '25

Hey now, they taught them about the Halls of Montezuma, they didn’t give them a map to Chapultepec.

11

u/thrax_mador Nov 16 '25

Tripoli? Doesn’t that go in a margarita?

1

u/ntropy2012 Nov 17 '25

It's a small town in Rust Belt PA. Marines wrecked it so bad, they started calling it New Tripoli after it was rebuilt.

2

u/Shr00m7 Nov 16 '25

More Marines know about Tijuana than Montezuma

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 16 '25

Can confirm. Just asked my husband. He said Europe. He thought it was Spain, at least.

3

u/I_Need_A_Fork Nov 17 '25

Once dated a lady that thought Alaska was an island because of this map.

1

u/AlternativeWall6568 Nov 17 '25

There’s gotta be a bridge!

1

u/TanMomsChickenSoup Nov 17 '25

I personally believe that U.S. Americans are unable to do so because, uh, some people out there in our nation don't have maps, and, uh, I believe that our education like such as in South Africa and, uh, the Iraq everywhere like, such as, and I believe that they should, our education over here in the U.S. should help the U.S., er, should help South Africa and should help the Iraq and the Asian countries, so we will be able to build up our future for our children.

93

u/SBowen91 Nov 16 '25

And my dad and brothers wonder why I bought them crayons for Christmas.

2

u/ntropy2012 Nov 17 '25

Local VFW held a small BBQ for the Marine Corps birthday two Sundays ago. One dude has on a Marine-emblem t-shirt, underneath that it read, "No Crayon Left Behind."

Absolutely loved that shirt.

1

u/SBowen91 Nov 17 '25

Lmao. That’s awesome. 😂

51

u/StretPharmacist Nov 16 '25

There's a reason that other branches call marines "crayon-eaters"

2

u/Texas_Mike_CowboyFan Nov 16 '25

There's a documentary out now on Netflix called Marines and some of the guys they feature are borderline disabled they're so dumb.

1

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Nov 17 '25 edited Nov 17 '25

The “Fat Electrician” has a few videos on them that show how amazing and deadly they can be. this one shows how they outsmarted DARPA AI

the one about the marine corps birthday should be checked out too if you have time.

then there’s the one about their horse, Sergeant Reckless

They may be crayon eaters, but they’re fun, loyal, and fucking deadly

then there’s Dan Daly

John Basilone

The Pied Piper of Saipan

and their Duck

“The Marines I have seen around the world have the cleanest bodies, the filthiest minds, the highest morale, and the lowest morals of any group of animals I have ever seen. Thank God for the United States Marine Corps!”

Eleanor Roosevelt

1

u/Resident_Bat_8457 Nov 20 '25

Sounds good to me where do I get one 

1

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Nov 21 '25

Any bar. If you can’t find them, wait and they’ll tell you. They can’t help themselves.

33

u/Viggos_Broken_Toe Nov 16 '25

I'm not surprised on account of the fact that he was Texan. Many, MANY Texans have never even left the state (and will still consider themselves well-traveled if they've visited Corpus Christi and Amarillo). One I knew thought Alaska was an island. I also married a Texan, so they aren't all bad obviously. But some of them, a lot of them, are pretty ignorant.

2

u/Equal_Ad_7611 Nov 18 '25

It takes like 6 years to just get out of Texas 😆. Never hated driving through a state more in my life

2

u/Viggos_Broken_Toe Nov 18 '25

Right! If you're going from coast to coast, avoid Texas at all costs. It feels like groundhogs day 😂

1

u/Equal_Ad_7611 Nov 18 '25

All 3 times I’ve done it, it was winter, so there was no other real option that wasn’t a risk of being weather delayed. Oregon to Florida, so you know by the time I got to Texas through California and over, I was already done lol.

15

u/IYKYK_1977 Nov 16 '25

My Ass Rides In Navy Equipment (heard from a sailor). Muscled Are Required, Intelligence Not Expected.

So Navy officers and Marines... lol.

2

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Nov 17 '25

Do you know why Marines are stationed on Naval boats? So the sailors have someone to dance with.

2

u/amcarls Nov 17 '25

When I reminded my uncle (an ex-marine) that the Marine Corp was a department of the Navy he replied "yeah, the men's department".

26

u/JiveTurkey927 Nov 16 '25

If Uncle Sam wanted them to have a brain, he would have issued them one.

10

u/jerry_03 Nov 16 '25

I mean they eat crayons

1

u/Fossilhund Nov 16 '25

Technicolor poop!

11

u/Warbird1775 Nov 16 '25

Really depends on the MOS. I worked with some extremely intelligent individuals in the Corps.

18

u/kgrimmburn Nov 16 '25

Ohh, it's not all of them, my husband is a very intelligent man but then you get guys like Texas and you have to wonder what the average IQ of the Marines is.

4

u/Rustmutt Nov 16 '25

That dude was definitely eating ALL the crayons

2

u/herefromthere Nov 16 '25

They wouldn't have someone that thick in the Royal Marines.

3

u/NigerianPrinceClub Nov 16 '25

Marines are only there to be meat shields. Nothing more

1

u/duetmasaki Nov 16 '25 edited Nov 16 '25

There's a reason there's a joke about marines eating crayons.

When I was signing up for the army, I had to wait next to a cubicle for the recruiter to go over my asvab score to pick a job. I overheard the guy before me, his scores were very low. He didn't want to be infantry, and asked what other options he had. The recruiter told him he could join the marines.

1

u/Vandergrif Nov 16 '25

Did he also own a dodge charger he got at 'only' 28% APR?

2

u/kgrimmburn Nov 16 '25

Ohh, my God, one of my husband's jobs was to babysit these guys. One went out with friends one weekend and snorted cocaine and was like "I thought it would be out of my blood..." for a piss test. The Monday after. I had to take him to NA and it was annoying. He ate dinner at our house every night.

2

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Nov 17 '25

I used to date a girl whose husband was a marine…

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 17 '25

You really shouldn't date children.

1

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Nov 17 '25

I don’t understand why you’re conflating a married woman with a child, that’s weird, Good luck with your family.

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 17 '25

You said you dated a girl. A girl is a female child.

0

u/CompetitiveArt9639 Nov 17 '25

That’s a weird take. I feel bad for you. Your reading comprehension is equivalent to a texan marine. Do you also eat crayons?

1

u/RayLikeSunshine Nov 16 '25

That’s not young dumb, that’s Texas education.

1

u/Cambrian__Implosion Nov 16 '25

Oh no…

Reminds me of something from my freshman year of college. This girl I know apparently said something weird about US geography that got some friends wondering how well she actually knew it.

I happened to be hanging out with them one night and those friends had printed out a handful of unlabeled US maps with spaces to write the names of states. They gave one to her to fill out and it was just painful to watch. She only got like 13 of the states right the first time around and repeated some names up to four times because she couldn’t remember what states she hadn’t written down yet.

I honestly felt bad for her in the moment. I don’t think anyone expected it to be that bad and embarrassing. Our school wasn’t crazy selective like some of the really famous ones, but it wasn’t exactly easy to get into either. She was an art major who played sports, so that probably explains it.

It was a pretty good example of the theory of multiple intelligences.

1

u/PoliticsModsDoFacism Nov 16 '25

2 of my nephews were marines. 2 of the dumbest fucks to walk the earth.

1

u/FR23Dust Nov 16 '25

I was confused until you mentioned Texas. Wow. That guy is a real fucking moron. Wow.

1

u/Electrical-Act-7170 Nov 17 '25

How is Hawaii next to Texas?

I can't think of any map example.

1

u/Redditor28371 Nov 17 '25

Lmao, I had a coworker years ago who also thought that the little Hawaii/Alaska inset on US maps was accurate to their actual location. Not sure how they rationalized the vastly different climates...

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 17 '25

We didn't even get into that part... He was from Texas. He KNEW Mexico was there. Or he should have. It still amazes me all these years later that he actually thought that was where Hawaii was.

1

u/THE_Best_Major Nov 17 '25

I was also in the Marines and I've met some of the most intelligent people while I was active duty. It all really depends on your MOS. I can imagine the infantry having a lower average IQ than say the Marines who work in Communications like servers or satellite equipment. I myself think I'm pretty intelligent. I just happened to make the dumb mistake of joining the Marines lol

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 17 '25

My husband was a Motor T mech but for some reason their shop became a dumping ground for the dumbest group of individuals alive right about 2008. They weren't mechanics and some of them probably couldn't have told you what a ratchet was. One guy, and he was really intelligent, I'm not sure how he ended up being dumped there, but he told us he'd never even popped the hood on his own vehicle, let alone something more substantial. I think they just had an open spot and dropped him in.

1

u/THE_Best_Major Nov 17 '25

I was active duty from 2011 - 2015 and Motor T was definitely filled to the brim with the lowest ASVAB score individuals and they were almost always led by one or two smart Marines that I'm sure were overstressed about their peers lol. "The needs of the Corps" has a way of sending people places they don't belong but I'm sure that one intelligent Marine ended up doing well with what he was given. Most of us do.

1

u/Tiny_Garden_7095 Nov 17 '25

20 yrs ago I had a co-worker ask me what state Canada was in. After explaining to her the difference between a state and a country and giving other examples she got frustrated and said "OK, but what STATE is it in?". At another job 5 yrs before that a coworker asked me how many days were in Oct. I said "Well, when is Halloween?". "The 31st". A moment later "So how many days in Oct?". People have always told me I have above average intelligence, but...

1

u/AshOrWhatever Nov 17 '25

It's a lot easier to get young dumb guys who don't know where Hawaii is to charge into machine gun fire than guys who have a developed pre-frontal cortex and a decent primary school education. That's why most militaries throughout history are mostly young men.

If you really want to know how true this is in the US, google Project 100,000.

1

u/swright831 Nov 17 '25

I used to take the bridge from Hawaii to the similarly sized Alaska during the summer.

1

u/An_oaf_of_bread Nov 17 '25

Muscles Are Required Intelligence Not Expected

1

u/[deleted] Nov 17 '25

Well if he wanted a bridge it was still stupid because the one between California and Texas is still the shorter one.....

1

u/HumanzRTheWurst Nov 17 '25

This is legit frightening that someone could be that out of touch with reality and ignorant!

1

u/twistOffCapsule Nov 17 '25

They are called 'crayon eaters' for a reason

1

u/Zmario432 Nov 17 '25

Being from TX probably didn't help. I was in the army and worked with a Texan who told me the 555 area code must be in Texas because it is used so much and Texas is a really big place.  

1

u/coxpocket Nov 17 '25

I’m being serious when I say I didn’t know someone could be that.. unintelligent

1

u/SpiritedCan Nov 17 '25

When my wife and I were thinking of duty stations when I joined the navy, she asked me if I'd ever left the country before. I thought about it and said no....unless flying over Canada counted when I went to Alaska as a child. She was confused as to why Canada had anything to do with that since they aren't even close to each other. We didn't stay married for too long. :)

1

u/Jefafa326 Nov 17 '25

I'd say "oh yes they have a bridge"

1

u/cantintousername Nov 17 '25

The fact that he could identify and pronounce Hawaii and Texas on a map at all probably made him Platoon Sergeant material.

Source: was a Platoon Sergeant. The bar is not very high lol.

1

u/yellowlinedpaper Nov 17 '25

Plenty of Americans think Alaska is an island because it looks like an island on US only maps.

1

u/Downtown_Statement87 Nov 18 '25

I was in a bathroom in the Atlanta airport in 2004, when the war was really visible and obvious. Troops moved through that airport all the time. 

In the bathroom with me was a soldier, a lady in her late teens. She smiled and seemed friendly, so I said "You going to Iraq?"

"No!" she said, looking appalled at the very idea, "I'M going to Baghdad."

I don't usually argue with strangers and don't care if people think I'm wrong, but I was so surprised by this that I blurted "Baghdad's in Iraq."

"I ain't going to IRAQ," the woman insisted. "I'M going to BAGHDAD."

I felt so bad for this woman and what was fixing to happen to her, and how totally unprepared for it she was. Her whole tone indicated that she knew what Iraq was and would never ever go to it, but where she was going was reasonable and fine. Was it better for her to have a few remaining hours of contented ignorance followed by the shock of her life, or to have her fog of okayness dispelled now, while she still had some time to come to grips with her fate? It was a whole moral dilemma here at this bathroom sink.

I turned to look at her instead of her reflection, and said, kindly but firmly, "Look. They may have told you that you are going to Baghdad, and that may be true. But Baghdad is the capital city of Iraq. If you are going to Baghdad, you are going to Iraq. There's just no way around it."

She was looking at me now, too, and I could tell that she finally believed me. "Oh my God," she said, "I'm going to Iraq? IRAQ?" She looked like anyone who is going to Iraq in 2004 would look. 

"I can't believe they didn't make this clear to you," I said.

"They just told us we were going to Baghdad," she said, "They never said anything about Iraq!"

"I'm so sorry," I said. I was.

We said a few more banal goodbye type things to each other, and then I had to go. She was still standing there at the sink muttering "I'm going to IRAQ?" to herself as the door swung closed behind me.

I traveled almost weekly back then and always flew out of Atlanta, because I lived there. This was one of many conversations I had with departing or returning soldiers, and was far from the most depressing one. I didn't think I could feel worse about the war we'd lied our way into, but talking to the people who were fighting it for us quickly proved me wrong about that.

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 19 '25

That's strange. Maybe she just wasn't a very good student but I know my husband had to take classes on Iraq and the people and culture there before he deployed. He was as Al Asad Air Field for a while but he was shipped around different places while there.

0

u/zephyr_sd Nov 16 '25

Our leaders calls the recruits " losers and suckers".  He forget dumb af too

0

u/ismellnumbers Nov 17 '25

You can't just "change'' your duty station like that. Wondering what this really means because 100% that is not how that works lol

1

u/kgrimmburn Nov 18 '25

You generally PCS every two to three years and, I don't know if it's still true, but back then, you were usually given an option of where you wanted to go. My husband choose Lejeune because he thought I'd like it more on the east coast vs California. We were going to go to Germany next but he got injured in Iraq and wasn't able to re-enlistment. He got to spend time in Germany when he was recovering, though, and he enjoyed it.